Forging a Future
by Downton Addict
Summary: Robert and Cora are both trying to do what they were raised to do, marry the right person and bring their family honor. But how do you do that and still be yourself? Cora and Robert courtship and early days. First time at an early piece.
1. A Future Worth Saving

Robert Crawley stared thoughtlessly out the carriage window as it made its way through the London maze. He didn't notice the gentle sway as the wheels pulled him along the city streets, or the soft spring breeze that wafted through the cracks in the closed door. His mind was on the conversation he had had with his father 3 weeks prior. It amazed him how ones world could change in the course of so short a time. 3 weeks ago he was Robert Crawley, Viscount Downton, Heir to the Earldom and estates entailed to him through his father and his father's father and all those who came before. A proud heritage, a noble name, and a life of privilege not to be squandered but respected. It had been the only work he had been trained for to grow to manhood, marry, produce an heir and take over from his father upon his death. He had been taught since the nursery that this was his goal, this was his life … there was no other purpose for Robert Crawley. This had suited Robert just fine. Pleased in fact, proud was he that he would one day rule over the estate and take upon himself the name Earl of Grantham. He would be a just and generous land owner, a kind employer and master to those in the house, a benevolent member of the community in which his estate resided. His one hesitation at taking on the Earldom was that for him to do so his father would have to be dead. There had always been the rub. But his father had taught him well how to put Downton first, how to be the man that ruled it all.

So it had been that Robert had accepted gladly the life that was mapped out for him. Yes, 3 weeks ago his world had all but come crashing down upon his ears and he could not find his way out. He felt as though he was drowning and could not reach the surface for air. 3 weeks ago his father had called him into his study and confessed that all was not well, that they were in financial trouble, that unless something changed – and soon, they would lose Downton. Robert had thought at first he misunderstood his father, this could not be so. The life, the only life he had been raised for would no longer exist. Who would Robert Crawley be then? Viscount Downton? Future … what? Who? Had he not looked into his father's eyes at the very moment his thoughts were running off in such a selfish manner he may have continued down that train of thought for who knows how long. Wallowing in the self-pity and dishonor of it all. But he had looked up; he had seen the despair in his father's eyes, the remorse, the guilt. He knew in that instant that he would do whatever he could to help save Downton.

At first his father explained there was nothing to be done. If they were lucky, very lucky, they could last at Downton perhaps until the end of the year. One last Christmas and then they would be gone. His father's concerns were for the farmers, the servants of the house, the village as a whole. He wore the strain of his worry in each line on his face and Robert knew it had cost him more than money to finally have to face it. It had cost him his pride, but he had given it when he realized he would have to somehow face the masses of people he had let down. For the next week Robert and his father had gone over books, plans, finances trying to find any untapped resource, any way to make things easier, make it last longer but it was for naught. Then at one dinner it had been Rosamund who made what was supposed to be a wise crack about Robert marrying wealthy and Robert had stopped mid bite. His pouched quail dangling in between the plate and his mouth as the words sunk in. Yes. Robert could fix this. He could secure his families fate, save his father's pride; reclaim the future he was born to have. He could marry a wealthy girl. Not just wealthy, an heiress. She would have to be from newer money more than likely as the kind of dowries the women in his circle came with may seem pleasing, but they would not suffice in this situation. It would be a blow to his mother for sure, to have him marry someone she considered 'less' in the social scheme of things. She would have to be new money, no doubt in that. But the London season was set to begin and the young women arrived in droves from the country estates and even countries abroad. He had never envisioned marrying for love anyway, his people very rarely had that luxury so it would be no great loss. Of course he had hoped to marry a woman of impeccable breeding and class, a woman that could please even his mother and her mountainously high standards. But given the circumstances he did not think even she could find fault with this plan. Marry a wealthy, possibly slightly less established girl, or lose Downton. There was no argument. So it had been that Robert had discussed it with his father that night. He made a plan with his mother over the course of the next week of what balls to attend, who may be worth looking into and had set of for London a week before his parents were even ready. He wanted to get started. If he was responsible for ensuring Downton's safety then there was no better time to start than right now.


	2. A Future Worth Trying For

Cora Levinson had walked the length of the drawing room a hundred times, or so it seemed. She found it hard to keep still when nerves plagued her, and she found herself nervous more often in England than she ever did at home. Besse, her maid had suggested that it was only natural for one to feel out of sorts when not at home, but Cora knew there was more to her nerves than that alone. Yes things were different here. The food tasted a little different, they drank more tea than she thought humanly possible, the manners were just that bit more refined and the social structure a lot more strict than she was used to. But that was not the cause of the constant butterflies and dull ache in her stomach. It was why she was here that caused her anxiety. She was to secure a title for her mother. A nice piece of old English aristocracy to rub a little of the dirt off the Levinson 'new money' name. Shine up the family image and make them all proud. Cora didn't think her father or Harold gave 2 hoots what anyone thought about the Levinson name, "they happily take the Levinson cash" her father often said. Of course it mattered a great deal to Martha Levinson, and what that woman wanted she almost always got. So it had been that once Cora had finally turned 18 she had been thrown the most elaborate of birthday balls, and then said farewell to New York and all those she held dear and made the voyage to London with her mother fussing all the way.

Cora was not surprised by any of this. She had been raised for this purpose, taught by the best tutors, completed hour upon endless hour of finishing lessons, how to curtsy, what the English aristocracy was made of, who outranked who, what titles meant, why they were important, how to hold your tea, sit up straight, a lady does this, a lady never does that … it had been one lifetime of teaching and preparing for Cora to marry an English Lord. Her mother had been preparing for this for 18 years as well and was practically giddy that the time had finally arrived. She had made sure that Cora was outfitted with only the best, the finest, the most beautiful gowns and jewels and coats. Cora was not the only American heiress in London without a doubt, but Martha Levinson intended that her daughter would stand out from the crowd, shining like a jewel. Sometimes Cora felt as though she was a jewel, a piece of valuable ornamentation that her mother would sell to the most titled Englishman she could find. It was in these moments that Cora felt her stomach flip and the air leave her body in a rush. She could get quite panicked if she thought that way for too long. Eliza Morison had been married off 3 seasons ago to an English Duke nearly twice her age with 3 children from his first wife, now dead of course. Cora and her friends had been horrified when Eliza and her husband had come to visit after their wedding, he was so old, so harsh looking and so stiff. It had sent Cora into a state of panic at the thought that she could end up that way. To Martha's credit she had come to Cora of her own accord after meeting Eliza's Duke and gently patted her hand adding, "That will never be you darling". Cora held onto those words one would a lifeline if they were drowning. Her mother would not just trade her in for a title; she would at least try for her daughter's happiness first.

So it was that Cora prepared herself to attend her first English ball and paced the floor waiting for her mother to be ready. Anyone would think it was Martha Levinson looking for a husband the way she was taking her time getting ready. All this time alone to pace the floor was only accomplishing one thing, making Cora more nervous. She had had to fight back the feeling that she would throw up by taking long breaths and had begun to wring her hands together the longer she waited. Finally the footman announced the arrival of Abigail Wentworth and her mother Margo and Cora's nerves eased at the sight of her friend walking in.

"Abigail how pleased I am to see you. You look a delight my dear." Cora rushed to embrace her friend in a gentle hug; there would be no getting past Martha Levinson in a crinkled gown.

"As do you Cora. You are quite breathtaking" Abigail gushed as they held hands and talked amongst themselves. If there was anything Cora could thank her mother for it was the foresight to plan their voyage with the Wentworth's. It had been a little surprising to Cora that her mother would want 'competition' around them, but Martha had simply waved her hand dismissively, "oh Cora, Abigail is a dear thing but she is no competition to you darling. Besides, I believe having a friend on hand will help keep you calm, and when you are calm you can be poised and remember how to behave with greater ease." Cora had rolled her eyes at the time, but now she could just hug her mother senseless for her forethought. Yes, having at least one friend in attendance would make things much easier for Cora and for that she was grateful. So it was that not 20 minutes later Cora found herself bundled into their rented carriage holding hands with her friend, off to face their futures.


	3. The Dumfrey's Ball

Years of training served a girl well and Cora silently thanked her mother a thousand times in her head for her rigorous lessons. Of all the American heiress's present at the Dumfrey's ball that night Cora Levinson was by far the most refined, and more importantly most educated on the manners of the English. She had heard Abigail make 3 mistakes when being introduced to young Viscount's and had made a mental note to explain the way things worked to her when they were next alone. Cora had also seen Rachel Charmical whom she knew from summers in Newport give the most strained curtsy to a most stiff looking Duke and felt a pang of sympathy for the poor girl. One look in her eyes and you could see Rachel was panicked and confused. Aside from Abigail and Rachel Cora did not know the other ladies at the ball. There were 3 other American girls there, or so her mother had informed her but they did not know any of them. Martha thought perhaps one of them was from California.

Cora had found that once she exited the carriage at the ball her nerves seemed to slip away and her years of training kicked in. She did not feel completely at ease, this was a room filled with strangers after all, and she here to find a groom. But at least she was not in a harried state of nerves each time she was introduced to another new person. She knew her mother was pleased with her because she had given her some free reign in which to not be chained to Martha's side and Cora had gladly taken the chance to slip outside into the garden where she found a bench upon which to sit a moment. Her feet ached from the constant dancing, her dance card never empty, and the attention she had received although very flattering was a bit much. She just needed a moment to herself. Just a little fresh air and a break from being Cora Levinson, heiress.

Robert did not have particularly grand ideas for how the Dumfrey's ball would turn out. He knew he could not find a wealthy heiress and win her over in a single night, although if there was a way he could do that he would most assuredly like to find out. He had known when he left Downton a week ahead of his parents that the Season was only just about to begin, not everyone had flocked to London yet. But he also knew that he had to start trying, he had been fishing on the estate many a time and knew the key was patience and the right kind of bait. He may not land a fish in one night, but he had to at least start putting in the work. Perhaps that was why he was so off tonight, he was looking at it like work. One should think of finding a person to marry as exciting and fun, but Robert felt an immense amount of pressure truth be told. Why he didn't know, it had been his idea after all. But once again it had been the look on father's face at the thought that perhaps Downton wouldn't have to go. There was a chance, and Robert was the chance. He had done the usual rounds, seen all the familiar faces, the girls he knew enough about to know they were not the solution to his problem. He hadn't any particular feelings toward any of them anyway. There were 6 American Heiresses in attendance and 1 Italian financier's daughter said to be worth an unknown amount. His Italian was very bad and he didn't know if she spoke English, his mother would faint if her daughter in law couldn't even speak the same language. He thought it best to see what America had to offer. It was a start.

He had danced with 3 girls from America, a Miss Abigail Wentworth, Miss Gloria Travis, and a Miss Liddy Brewer. They all seemed nice enough, Miss Brewer had been rather pretty and Robert thought maybe he could get his man to look into her situation later in the week. You just never know, perhaps there could be something there. Despite knowing he was on a mission, and despite knowing what was at stake Robert found himself rather put out about it all. "It was your idea you fool" he reminded himself as he made his way to the garden for some air. He needed to just have some time to himself, maybe a little time to think. He knew he would do what he had to to save Downton, but right now he was a little tired from the events of the last few weeks and he just needed some time to himself. Walking into the garden he turned to the left to shy away from a small group gathered to the right and headed towards the bench he knew was located further down this path. That's exactly what he needed … to follow this path while he thought of his future.


	4. Air To Breathe

Cora realized too late that it was much colder than she anticipated in this English garden and rubbed her gloved hands up and down her arms. She really should be heading back inside, but it had taken a little maneuvering to escape the crowd on the other side of the garden, and now she had some solitude protected from their sight by a low row of perfectly manicured hedges. She could endure the cold a moment longer to enjoy such a night. Slowly and almost without noticing she began to hum a soft lullaby as she rubbed her arms and softly swayed on the bench. She did not notice the crunching sounds of the feet as they approached, so caught up in her thoughts and her melody.

Robert thought he could hear someone humming nearby and thought it funny how the sound must have carried as he was quite alone. The sound gave him comfort though as he recognized the tune as a lullaby he had heard as a little boy, and for the first time in 3 weeks he felt the beginnings of a genuine smile form at his lips. Perhaps if he had been paying more attention he would have noticed the young woman sat on the bench as he approached. However his thoughts were caught up in the sweet melody and the memories it was bringing back to him that he did not notice until he all but sat on her lap.

"Good heavens. I am most sorry Miss I did not see you" he said jumping to his feet. He had sat so close to the young woman that there legs had been touching, an inch more and he would have sat in her lap. The young woman with the dark hair let out a cry of surprise and rose to her feet at the same time.

"No need to apologize, I assure you I was quite in my own world just now or I would have noticed your approach" she gave the sweetest little laugh as she smoothed the skirt of her gown and came to her full height, back straight, posture perfection itself. She was American. Had his thoughts not been on Downton so fully he might have noticed her piercing blue eyes, or the way the moonlight caught her hair and danced across her curls first. But no, the first thing he heard was the sound of her voice and what that might mean.

"It is not your duty to be on the lookout for such as I. The responsibility is mine to ensure the safety of the women in my presence and I do apologize." He bowed to her slightly to ensure she knew he was not only sorry, but also a gentleman. A smile came to Cora's mouth as she noted the difference in his apology to that of her American peers. Not better, not worse, just different. She had to admit she did enjoy the way he bowed to her. She nodded her head in acceptance of his gesture and spoke,

"You are too kind Sir. It makes a girl feel most safe with gentlemen such as you out there ensuring our safety" Cora couldn't help but bite her lip to stop from giggling. It was all so silly. He hadn't seen her, he had sat next to her, it was really nothing to fuss over. But that was the way of things here … fuss, fuss fuss. Cora looked up and studied the face of the apologetic gentleman for as long as she dared. He had brown hair with a slight curl at the tips, a kind face with light blue eyes. She thought there seemed a little sadness in those eyes, but she did not know him well enough to know for sure.

"You are welcome of course Miss … Ah, I see. You are laughing at me" the realization dawned on him that she was a little amused by their encounter.

"I would never do such a thing I assure you. But perhaps if you were to laugh a little at the humorous situation in which we find ourselves I could laugh _with_ you instead" Cora knew it was bold and brazen of her, and if her mother heard her she would be in real trouble, but sometimes Cora just wanted to be Cora ... not Cora Heiress and Title seeker. Besides, this man did beg a little to have fun with, and she would like to hear him laugh.

"I see Miss … well here I go again, I do not even know your name, although I hazard a guess you are American are you not?"

Nodding Cora answered with her lips turned into a cheeky smile, "Was it the dress that gave me away as foreign? Or perhaps it was the bench sitting that did it? I cannot figure out how you English keep finding out my nationality so easily" at first Robert stared at her in confusion, young ladies did not speak to him thus. They answered questions with politely and gave appropriate responses. This young woman was playing with him. He supposed he had made it rather easy to make sport of him, he had been rather distracted upon his arrival and had diverted to his training of manners, manners, manners. Cora looked up and felt a nervous flitter start in her stomach once again. Perhaps she should not have made fun? Perhaps he would not like it and think her uncouth? Perhaps he would tell others and then word would get out that the Levinsons were a shabby sort and not to have anything to do with them. Suddenly it was Cora whose eyes turned to sadness, or was that fear? Looking into her eyes Robert noticed that they were a rather dazzling shade of blue, and that she had perhaps regretted her joke. He didn't want her to regret speaking with him. She was American, maybe an heiress, and she had such beautiful eyes. So before he could stop himself Robert started to laugh. More than was probably necessary but it was real and it felt wonderful to laugh instead of think for a moment. The relief came washing across her face like a wave and she turned her lips into a broad smile before she joined him in laughter. Robert noted that her face lit up when she laughed and she tilted her head to the side slightly when she did so. It caused Robert to notice the delicate line of her neck and soft features of her face. Of all the woman in attendance tonight she was by far the most beautiful, and apparently the most funny. No one else had made Robert laugh this way. Regaining himself Robert extended his arm for her to take and she laced her arm through his.

"Allow me to escort you back to the ball before we are found out and thought to be terribly improper. Miss … but I still do not know your name, or shall I call you Miss Witty?" Robert smiled at her chuckling to himself. At least this little meeting had helped blow off some of his worries. He felt much lighter with her on his arm.

"No, I think my mother would have a spell if you did. I am Miss Levinson, Miss Cora Levinson, of New York. And I do believe it is proper for you to offer me your name Sir. After all, I am on your arm." Cora motioned with her eyes to where her hand laced in the fold of his arm and raised her eyebrows in a teasing manner. He was very much a gentleman to take her arm and offer her a way out of this intimate and completely improper interlude. If her mother knew she was out alone in the garden, secluded, with a man she did not know she really would have a spell. Girls had been ruined for less she was sure.

"You do get rather to the point don't you?" Robert grinned studying the beautiful face of Miss Cora Levinson a moment longer. He was not sure exactly what to think of this lovely creature. She was lovely, he could not deny.

Cora shrugged her shoulders, "Well it is a far sight better than beating around the bush" given their current location behind a hedge and between the bushes Robert found her clever retort charming and let out a throaty chuckle. She was lovely yes, and intelligent too or so it seemed. He would need to have his man look into this Miss Cora Levinson, yes, he would have him look into her first thing in the morning.

"You are quite something Miss Levinson. May I be so bold as to ask for the next dance once we return inside?"

"Of course I would be happy to dance with you … as soon as you tell me your name Sir. Only an ill bred woman danced with a man she cannot call by name" Cora pretended to scold him with her tone, but her playful eyes told the true story, she found him fun to be with. She felt a flutter in her stomach, but this time it was not nerves.

"Robert Crawley, Viscount Downton at your service Miss Levinson" he nodded his head in way of introduction and Cora lowered her lashes, suddenly a little embarrassed, a slight blush crept to her cheeks. Probably due to the fact she knew her mother would approve of him, he had a title, and he was easy to talk to.

"It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance Viscount Downton" Cora said raising her eyes to meet his. A soft smile formed on his lips and for once Robert felt himself being able to genuinely say,

"The pleasure Miss Levinson is all mine" as he led her back to the ballroom. Cora could not know how long they had lingered in the garden together, but the fluttering in her stomach would not settle. Viscount Downton. She would need to find out more about this handsome young Lord.

Robert led Miss Levinson onto the dance floor and for the first time in 3 weeks felt that perhaps his future was not so out of his reach after all.


	5. Paying Calls

Three days after the Dumfrey's ball Cora sat in the day room of their rented London house and tried to focus on her book. The rush and bustle of arriving in London, followed by the Dumfrey's grand ball, a dinner party, and a night out to the theater had left Cora itching to do more than sit and read. Although if she lay down right now she could probably fall straight to sleep tired as she was. They had been kept busy with social engagements during the days, luncheon with the Wentworth's, tea with Lady Middlemore and her 2 daughters, walks through the park with Abigail, and trips to the shop with her mother. That combined with their busy evening schedule had left Cora feeling an odd mixture of exhaustion and energy. She was a social creature and enjoyed being around people, and thus far everyone had been very kind, although a bit stuffy for Cora's tastes.

It was as she turned the same page for a third time that her mother chided her, "Cora if you are not reading that thing put it down, you are terribly distracted and it is making me lose focus" Martha was seated at a desk on the side of the room writing a letter to Cora's father. Cora put her book down and fought the urge to blush after her mother followed up with, "What is the matter with you today?"

"Nothing at all mother, it is just difficult to stay still after the business of the last few days" Cora lied with a smile on her face and a twinkle in her eye and her mother seemed to accept it for truth. If Cora was telling the truth she would say that during this time as she finally had the chance to sit and be still her thoughts had turned to the handsome Viscount Downton, Lord Robert Crawley and the way he had danced with her and made her smile. Once Robert had led her to the dance floor he had danced with her twice, and those dances remained cemented in Cora's memory outshining all other dances of that night. He had returned Cora to her mother following the second dance and remained with them long enough to be formally introduced to Martha and cast several twinkling gazes at Cora that had not gone unnoticed. Once home she had prepared for bed with thoughts of Viscount Downton dancing through her mind. Having been so busy she had not given him much more thought, but today sitting in the day room he was returning to her thoughts making her feel a slight flip of excitement in her stomach.

Robert had returned from the Dumfrey's ball with a large smile and a feeling of a much lighter load upon his shoulders. He was not foolish enough to think he would marry the first girl he saw, or even have the chance to court someone so soon, but meeting and dancing with Miss Cora Levinson had given him more hope than he had had since his father had told him the news of Downton. She was most definitely beautiful - the most stunning in attendance that night, her striking blue eyes twinkling against her soft porcelain skin. The contrast of her dark curly hair made such an impressive view that he could not get her image out of his mind. She was beautiful, and had been charming and witty as well. She had said things that other young girls would have thought and been too scared to say, yet she was not impolite or uncultured. She was a wonderful mixture of beauty and brains – or so it seemed. He had only spent a fairly brief amount of time with her, but had decided he wanted to spend more. Before he did though he had his man of business make inquiries into her family, their fortune. It would do nobody any good to go rushing in and getting involved with someone so appealing only to find her wealth lacking.

He had not been disappointed when Stanley had returned that morning with news of the Levinson's, their wealth, and the reported dowry the beautiful Miss Cora came with. Robert had questioned Stanley at length to make sure that the figures were in fact accurate. How had he come upon them so quickly? Stanley could not say for sure why the information was so freely available, but did hint that Mrs. Martha Levinson had allowed inquiries into the family wealth to be easily accessed hoping to gain interest in her daughter. Robert was astonished at the size of the fortune and Cora's dowry was more than he had every heard of. She was most definitely qualified to be courted; even his mother could not sniff at what a bride like Cora would bring to the table. Downton would most assuredly be saved with money of this nature, saved and secured for generations. The thought made Robert smile and relief washed over him as he considered courting a beautiful, intelligent and wealthy young woman.

It was during his thoughts that he realized in horror that he could not be the only young Lord seeking a wife this season, not even the only one in financial despair. A prize like Cora Levinson would not go unnoticed for long, and Robert knew although his lands were great and his title desirable, there were others with more land and more grand titles. He would have to move and move quickly. He would have to be more open than he was used to in order to win her favor, there was no time to play games and be coy about things. He would have to let her know that he was interested in her, woo her, be attentive and generous. It was with this thought in mind he called for the carriage … he had a call to make.

Not 5 minutes since putting down her book in favor of looking out the window Morley opened the door to announce the presence of a visitor.

"Viscount Downton to see Mrs. and Miss Levinson" Cora felt her stomach flip at the sound of his name, she tried to keep her face impassive as she didn't wish her mother to know her thoughts at such an early juncture.

Martha stood from her desk after casting a brief look at Cora, and said with her usual brisk American tone, "Well show them in". Cora joined her mother at the couch and turned to receive their guest. Viscount Downton entered the room in his day jacket looking more handsome than Cora remembered and she quickly averted her gaze to avoid blushing.

"Mrs. Levinson, Miss Levinson, do please excuse my unannounced visit. I was out of the house on business and thought I would see how London is treating you both." He gave a short bow in their direction and Cora bowed her head toward him but did not open her mouth to speak. She had sat next to her mother during enough visits to know that Martha Levinson would take over in the beginning; Cora's job was to sit up straight and look pretty. As they sat Cora straightened her back and pulled her shoulders back to the point of hurting, placing a serene smile upon her face.

"Thank you Lord Downton, how kind you are to think of us. We have found your countrymen very accommodating and friendly since we arrived here, I did not know the English could be so kind" Martha said with her usual enthusiasm. Inwardly Cora cringed at her mother's last comment, she did hoped Lord Downton did not take offence as she was once again reminded at how handsome he was, how kind his eyes seemed. Cora met his gaze and shared a silent acknowledgement of her mother's comment, and then Cora lowered her gaze … looking at him for too long made her feel too overheated.

Robert was pleased that Cora lowered her gaze from his and her cheeks turned a light pink. In his estimation it meant that she was being coy, that he affected her in a way that made her blush, that he was not just another caller, but perhaps someone she had thought of since the ball. He also noted that Mrs. Levinson had mentioned his 'countrymen' … how many other callers had there been?

Martha called for tea and they spent half an hour discussing the success of the Dumfrey's ball, the business that kept Mr. Levinson in the States, and the make up of Robert's family. He gladly noted the look of pleasure that came across Mrs. Levinson's face as he explained the family's estate and the title they had passed down through the generations. This was a mother who was hunting for a title, she wanted her daughter to marry a man like Robert, it was clear that this was the purpose behind their visit to London. He felt an odd sense of admiration for the woman as she did not try to hide her plans behind veiled excuses and reasons for them to be present during the season. Although she did not come straight out and say they were hunting for a titled match, she did not try to hide the fact. With this knowledge tucked away coupled with the thoughts of other callers Robert did something he would not have usually done, certainly not upon his second meeting.

"Thank you Mrs. Levinson for allowing me this lovely visit. I am sure I have taken you from your daily tasks" he lay the ground work with a smooth smile.

"You are most welcome Lord Downton. I was merely sending correspondence to Mr. Levinson, nothing of great importance" she waved her hand dismissively and laughed. Robert saw how Cora relaxed slightly and laughed with her mother, apparently the thought of Mr. Levinson being of little importance was funny to the 2 of them.

"I should not keep you then, I would be remiss to keep you from your husband in any way." He saw Cora purse her lips to try to hide a smile and it spurred him on, "But perhaps Mrs. Levinson you would allow me to escort Miss Levinson for a walk through the park. It is a lovely day today and I fear to tell you that the weather in my country is not always so agreeable, one must take advantage of it when it appears." He kept his eyes fixed on Mrs. Levinson but from the corner of his eyes he saw Cora draw a quick breath. Yes, she wanted to go for a walk with him, she was interested in learning more about him and it pleased Robert immensely.

"You are so kind Lord Downton, I am sure Cora would enjoy getting out on such a fine day. I really do have to attend to Mr. Levinson's letter, he is most eager to hear about our time here." Martha stood signally to Robert and Cora to do the same. "What do you say Cora? Would you like to take a walk with Lord Downton?" she turned her attention to Cora with a smile and a look Cora knew meant she was supposed to say yes. It wouldn't have mattered what her mother's look said, Cora would have said yes no matter if her mother wanted her to or not. This visit had been pleasant, but her input and ability to speak had been small. She wanted to talk to Robert Crawley and walk on his arm once again. He obviously came to call to see her, he obviously had an interest in her and it made Cora feel a quickening of her pulse.

Looking at her mother then flitting her eyes to Lord Downton's gaze Cora answered in a quiet voice; "Yes mother, I think I would like very much to go with Lord Downton."


	6. A stroll through the park

Cora found herself falling into step with Lord Downton easily and imagined he must have shortened his stride on her behalf in order to make this happen. Noticing how he made the effort to do small things to make her more comfortable caused the hint of a smile to touch the corners of her lips once more. They had been walking for 10 minutes and she had noticed how easily they were able to converse without really knowing each other. He had begun the conversation with quick talk of the weather, and then had moved to questions about life in America. Once again Cora felt this was to help her feel at ease while in the presence of a man alone.

"And your father Miss Levinson? How does he feel about your recent trip to English shores?" He tilted his head to the side to see the look at her face as she spoke. Robert was walking much slower than usual with his stride so much shorter, but his goal was for Miss Levinson to be as comfortable as possible. If he was honest his motives for this was not only because he was a gentlemen, but perhaps more importantly he wanted her to be comfortable with him, at ease enough to enjoy herself, to become used to him in a way that could progress into something more … and quickly.

The hint of a smile turned into a large beautiful one as she began to speak of her father, "Oh, papa just does whatever mother thinks is best in these sorts of things." she spoke openly and Robert could feel her body relax a little next to him as they walked in step. She was easy to talk with, and Robert found himself enjoying her company more than he probably should. He did not want to let himself get too involved in case she were to reject him, or things did not go as planned. The last thing a man in his position could afford was heart break or emotional responses in this regard. He was here to woo her, he was thankful that she was pleasant and beautiful and smart, but he would have had to pursue her regardless with a dowry the size of hers.

"Papa is rather helpless when it comes to mother I am afraid." Cora giggled thinking of her father and the way he bent over backwards to please her mother. "He is rather smitten I am afraid, despite her … um … demanding nature" Cora blushed a little at her own boldness, talking about romance and her parents in this manner made her all the more aware of the handsome young man on her arm. She enjoyed being on his arm, she could feel the tight muscles of his limb beneath his jacket, and every now and again their legs brushed each other as they walked along.

"Really Miss Levinson, you shock me with your openness" Robert said in mock surprise causing the most pleasing giggle to escape Cora's lips. She was beautiful, there was no doubt, and the sound of her laughter Robert thought would not ever get old.

"Really Lord Downton I thought you were already aware of my shocking American nature" Cora teased back, smiling coyly up into his face. Her breath caught briefly as their eyes met for a moment and he kept her gaze. He had the kindest blue eyes she thought she had ever seen. The most handsome, distinguished face. She tried to remind herself she had yet to meet other Englishmen, but she could not imagine anyone being more charming than the one on her arm.

"Oh I am not entirely sure your shocking nature has anything to do with being American Miss Levinson, I fear perhaps it is just part of who you are" Robert watched happily as her smile grew at his comment, remembering his mission he added more than he really aught, "and if I am honest Miss Levinson I do not find your nature shocking at all, I find it refreshing … like a summer breeze" he knew he had hit his mark when she turned her head away briefly to hide the blush he saw already gracing her cheeks. Good heaven she was beautiful, never more so than when a light pink crept into her cheeks and she became almost shy. She could be quite disarming in her charm and beauty. Robert mentally reminded himself once more to keep himself aware of what he needed from her. He did like her, she was lovely, but he had more important things to worry about than whether his future wife was lovely and so he continued.

"I apologize Miss Levinson if I have overstepped, I find myself rather unable to keep myself from telling you the thoughts that creep into my mind. Do please excuse me" he nodded towards her in a gentle bow and Cora felt her pulse race in that warm way that made her body tingle. He had compared her to sunshine and summertime. He could not keep himself together in her presence; he had all but told her he liked her. Cora bit her lip before she turned her head back to his.

"There is no need to apologize Lord Downton, I find your honesty and goodness as refreshing as cool dip in the warm sea" now it was Robert's turn to blush as he immediately drew an image of Miss Levinson splashing in the water to his mind. He found her too attractive perhaps; it was hard to keep from liking her too much. She had also praised his honesty which gave him an unwanted feeling of dread in his gut. He was not lying to her, not really he told himself as he contemplated her words. He wasn't lying so much as handling the courtship differently than he would have 3 weeks ago. This had become a courtship in his mind, he would make it had. It was not a lie to flatter her and tell her things that were true, she was like a summer breeze, she was slightly shocking, she was beautiful beyond words … the lie was in his reasons for pursuing her so openly. The lie was in his approach. This was not how Robert Crawley would have usually behaved with a young woman, not that it was wrong, it just wasn't how things were done.

"Well, now I must confess Miss Levinson, now you may have actually shocked me. What would your father think of you walking alone with a man and speaking in this way" he teased of course and spoke quieter than he had before so that she had to lean in slightly to hear him, he did enjoy the way her cheek nearly brushed his shoulder.

Once again she smiled at the mention of her father, "Well now you have a problem Lord Downton for papa would never think ill of me … but you Lord Downton, you he may have torn apart by wild dogs" Robert could not stop the loud burst of laughter that escaped his lips at her blatant honesty. She was like no-one he had met and he was thrilled by it.

The sound of his laughter was deep and pleasant and Cora decided she should like to make him laugh more if she could. She also knew she should actually make some real conversation so as to not seem completely childish to someone of his background and heard her mother's voice in her head reminding her of propriety and manners.

"I am pleased you think my father such a comic relief Lord Downton" she laughed with him momentarily, before she quieted her voice a little as they approached a park bench and he motioned for her to sit. "If I am to speak openly Lord Downton the truth is that my father is a wonderful man. He would never deny mother or I anything and has been the most generous and kind man."

As if taking his queue from her Robert lowered his voice and straightened his expression once again, "Your poise and grace is a testament to the kind of man he must surely be Miss Levinson, he must be rather remarkable." She smiled once more and nodded her head not missing the compliment to her laid in his remarks.

"Yes he is. I have long thought I should be lucky to marry a man as kind and generous as he" almost forgetting herself and who she was with she continued in a soft voice, "Although it is not proper to speak of such things, I have not missed the way he so obviously loves and cares for mother. It has been my most heartfelt dream to have a man love me as my father loves my mother. He is quite lost without her. The way that must feel, to need another's presence so much must be the dearest feeling. That is why I know he would do anything for mother, it is very difficult for him to have her gone from his side for such a long trip, but he does so at her request." Robert found himself almost with his mouth open. No-one had ever spoken to him of love in this way. Certainly not a young woman, he was gripped with a sudden feeling of fear and dread. She wanted to be loved. She wanted more than just love; she wanted a devoted kind of love, the kind of love one read about in books. What kind of man would he be if he took that chance away from her? He needed to marry someone sooner rather than later, and if things went well he could see himself married to someone just like Cora Levinson. But love? That had never been part of his plan. He was focused on wooing her, making her feel he was right for her, making her feel he could be a good match for her … but love? He didn't know if he could do that in such a short space of time … if ever. Realizing he was almost gaping at her he gathered himself together. He could not think of these things now. Downton was at stake. Who was to say he couldn't love someone like her. His attraction was real; he liked her very much already. He could not risk losing this moment and so he pulled himself back from the fear and dove ahead. Taking her hand in his he spoke with purpose and looked at her face. Her eyes were most glorious.

"Miss Levinson, never has anyone shared such an open view of their deepest thoughts with me. I am most thankful for the trust you place in me. You are rather magnificent Miss Levinson. Rather magnificent" Cora felt the feel of his hand against hers and drew a breath. She had shared more than she should have; she had never told another soul the things she had just told Lord Downton. She almost couldn't help herself, he made her feel safe, and special and her body tingled at his touch and gaze. Her voice came out barely above a whisper and she cast her gaze down away from his face,

"You are most welcome Lord Downton …" he interrupted her gently.

"Please, do not think me terribly forward even though I know that I am … but might I ask you to please call me Robert, when we are alone at least" Cora looked up quickly and realized he had leaned closer. Their faces were inches apart and their eyes were locked. She felt her stomach flip and focused on drawing breath. Calling him by his first name! That meant they were courting. That meant he cared for her. That meant … good heavens that meant they were trying to see if they wanted to marry each other. Cora could not tear her eyes away for the soft blue of his gentle eyes.

"Oh …" was all she managed for the space of several seconds, "yes, I think I would like to call you by your given name, if you will the same for me. Please, call me Cora … Robert" she couldn't maintain his gaze any longer, it was too intense and she felt she might burst into flames. This was all so quick; he made her feel so different than any man ever had.

Robert felt the warmth coming from Cora's body as she was obviously taken over with the intensity of the situation. Although he wanted to keep talking with her in this way, this close, he knew he had a responsibility as a gentleman to maintain propriety in their dealings, especially if she would one day be the Countess of Grantham. How had this happened so fast? Sure, they were not engaged, they had just begun to know each other, but he had helped to move things along very quickly and could see that she most definitely liked him. This could really happen if their courtship continued as happily and easily as it had so far. Pushing his feelings of doubt about leading her astray aside, he helped her to her feet.

"Thank you … Cora. It will give me great pleasure to have your name on my lips" that was not a lie. He would enjoy calling her Cora, seeing her blush the way she was right now, having her on his arm. He could think of her need to find love, he could not think of the reasons for pursuing her so vigorously. Who was to say he would not have pursued her anyway? She was wonderful, and a quick mind, and divine to look at. He may have sought her out regardless of his financial situation, but he would never know that. His situation was what it was, and he needed the money that came with her regardless of whether he fell in love with her or not.

Walking her back to her home and her mother he lingered in the entryway a moment longer as they said their goodbyes.

"Thank you for the lovely walk Robert" she said as she removed her gloves. Hearing the way her accent formed his given name gave him a warm feeling in his stomach.

"You are most welcome Cora. If I may, I would very much like to call on you tomorrow, perhaps a carriage ride through Hyde in the afternoon?" even hearing the words leave his mouth he knew he wanted to see her again. Despite the money, he wanted to see her.

"Of course Robert. I would like that very much" and with that they said their goodbyes.

Cora excused herself from her mother's presence feigning fatigue and took herself to her room for a rest. She lay on the bed and replayed the events of the walk in her head, with a smile across her face.


	7. Courting

Robert Crawley, Lord Downton had returned to collect Cora the next day as planned. They had enjoyed a carriage ride through Hyde Park and spent well over an hour talking and laughing together as they became better acquainted with each other. Cora found him surprisingly easy to talk to, and she relaxed a little more in his presence than she did with anyone else. He was very attentative and complementary, he was also smart and funny and not at all pompous or stuck up as some of the titled English seemed to be. The way he spoke of his family's estate made her feel of his goodness and generosity. He wanted to carry on the family way of helping the village, working with the farmers, providing employment and means to that in need. Cora found herself unable to think of much else once she had returned home and had simply replayed their carriage ride over and over in her head.

The following day he had called on Cora and her mother for tea, and once again they had taken a private walk after. Cora had now come to know enough about him to know what she didn't know and had plied him with an array of questions ranging from his time at Eton, to the layout of the house at Downton. He had teased that he felt he was being interrogated by the police. Cora had replied that she was in fact a foreign spy … Robert had been forced to swallow hard as an image of Cora as a mysterious foreign spy had crept into his mind and made him rather hot under the collar.

The next day he had offered to escort Cora and her mother to the opera and dinner after. He could tell that Mrs. Levinson was becoming quite fond of him and he had noted with pleasure she had ceased to mention 'other callers' who may or may not have come by. Cora had told him of 2 of his peers who had paid calls during the week, but according to her their visits had been brief and their personalities not at all to her liking. He had teased her that she was just trying to make him feel good, but she had assured him that they were not receiving private carriage rides or walks in the park. The opera was going to be important for Robert as it was the last meeting they would have before his parents and Rosamond arrived from Downton the next day. He would have to tell them something at that point and knew he would get the 3rd degree. His mother would blanche at how quickly he had pursued Cora, Rosamond would probably laugh, his father may ask him to weigh his options. He was not ready to propose marriage of course, she had not even met his parents, but he did have it firmly in mind and would need to decide after tonight if he was going to keep up his courtship with such fervor and zeal, or move on. He could imagine moving on to anyone else, he genuinely liked Cora, he just had to be sure. Once his family arrived and she met them things would move at lightning speed and he had to feel comfortable.

Arriving at the Levinson's rented home he was greeted by a footman and almost instantly after him Miss Cora Levinson herself.

"Good evening Robert, how are you?" she gave him a smile but her eyes weren't in it and he felt something was wrong. She was dressed so exquisitely he had to stop himself staring at her. The lace trimmed bodice held firm to the curves of her breast and gathered at her waist showing her slender figure. The color was a deep red that set against her porcelain skin made her even more beautiful than he had ever seen her.

"Cora you look a vision in red. You take my breath away." He concluded his complement with a bow in her direction and saw her face flush pink. He did love it when he could do that to her. He could see that he would have no problem fulfilling the physical duties of marriage with Cora. He was very attracted to her.

"Thank you Robert, you are, as always much to kind. But I am afraid I have bad news that may affect our evening" she looked at his face and her eyes were not shining as they usually were. "Mother has been taken ill and cannot attend. She is not sure if I should be seen out with you alone at night, she is concerned it may cause … talk" Cora was leading him to the day room where a footman was waiting to give them both a glass of champagne.

"Your mother is right to be concerned for you Cora, she only wants your good name to be protected. Is your mother currently indisposed or may I have a word with her?" Cora was surprised that he would want to talk with her mother, but nodded her head and led him through to the library where Martha was resting with a book waiting to see what happened with Cora before she took herself back to bed.

"Mrs. Levinson" Robert said gently as he approached Martha with a little bow, "I am sorry to hear you are not well. Have you a physician to attend you? I can call for ours if you stand in need?"

Martha waved her hand in the air dismissively, "No no, not necessary Lord Downton, I am simply run down and with a cold. Sleep and broth will fix this, mark my words. But it was kind of you to offer. Please do sit" she motioned for him to take a seat opposite her own chair, Cora coming to sit beside her mother. "I am afraid this does rather put a kink in the Opera plans though doesn't it" she went on. Robert nodded and listened, "You see Lord Downton, should Cora attend alone with you this evening I fear it would send the message that you are both involved in , excuse me for being so bold, an exclusive courtship. I like you very much My Lord, but such a message at this juncture would discourage other young men from showing an interest in my lovely daughter, so you see … I do not think she will be able to attend with you. You do understand."

"But Mother" Cora began, Martha held up her hand cutting her off.

"Mrs. Levinson, I whole heartedly agree with you and applaud your motherly instincts in this matter. If you will forgive me for now being bold, may I say that if I took Miss Levinson to the Opera alone tonight and it sent the message that we were courting in earnest …" Robert paused as his gaze left Martha's and found Cora's, she was on the edge of her seat, hanging on his every word, her blue eyes locking on his and sending a shiver of a thrill through him, returning his gaze to Mrs. Levinson he finished, "I believe I would be most pleased by that." He heard Cora let out a quiet gasp and resisted the urge to look at her. He had to convince Martha to let her daughter go with him. He would like to court her, and he wanted to do so exclusively.

"Lord Downton, are you saying you would like permission to Court my daughter?" Martha asked with a rise of her eyebrows.

With a slow nod of his head Robert smiled, "Yes Mrs. Levinson. I would like that very much"

Their carriage ride to the Opera had been all nerves and stolen glances, the accidental brushing of hands against each other. Robert Crawley had asked to court her. If they continued in this way a marriage could occur in a matter of months. Cora found herself both nervous and excited at the same time. He was so handsome in his white tie and tails. The way he looked at her made her lose her breath and her pulse race. She had imagined what it would be like to kiss him, remembering that caused her to flame red and she turned away for a moment.

Robert had not anticipated having to decide at the beginning of the evening if he wanted to court Cora in earnest or not. He had thought to have more time this evening to consider, but the combination of her figure in that red dress and the way she had looked at him in the library had caused him to make the decision early. He knew it had been a decision spurred on by his attraction to her and not the best course of things, but sitting so close to her in the carriage he did not really care. His mother would be furious he had made his courtship public without so much as a mention of the girls name to his family, but that would have to be dealt with tomorrow. Tonight, his job was wooing a beautiful girl in red, and he liked his job a great deal.

The opera was lovely, crowded of course, but having Cora on his arm made Robert feel superior to those of his peers there alone. He had seen the other men who had called on Cora and felt their eyes follow them as they walked through the foyer. An immense sense of pride fell upon him as he considered the stunning woman walking with him through the crowd. He was by far the luckiest man there; Cora made all other women pale in comparison, and the way her dress held to her body in the right places made every man aware of just how lucky Robert Crawley was. He knew it was base, he knew it was superficial, but he felt like the cat that got the cream.

Dinner was more of the same. People Robert had known all his life looking at the couple as they dined. Some closer friends and acquaintances came to talk with them, Cora was her most intelligent and witty self charming them all with her brilliant smile and those striking blue eyes. By the time they reached the carriage Robert felt he was ready to propose then and there … only thought of his mother held him back. That, and Cora. He felt she would need more time. He knew she felt love was important and they had only known each other a week. He would need to be patient, but as far as he was concerned he had found the savior of Downton, his future wife. She was beautiful beyond description, carried herself with grace, she was intelligent, funny, sincere and sweet. She came with the money to fix their problems forever, and she made his blood boil in the best kind of way. He was attracted to her in all the physical ways a man could be. The more time he spent with her the more he felt that way. Perhaps it was the way other men looked at her, and then looked at him obviously impressed, jealous even. It made him feel ready to do things to her that he could never tell her about … well, perhaps on their honeymoon if she would accept him. He didn't love her, he didn't know her enough for that, but he didn't need love in a marriage so he that did not matter to him. He could live a lifetime with Cora, she would be a wonderful wife, a distinguished Countess. He just had to give her more time. She needed to feel more, she had less riding on this than he did.

The carriage ride home was much cozier than the ride earlier, some of their nerves being extinguished by spending the evening together and the bottle of champagne they had shared. Cora sat close to Robert on the seat and could see the slight curl of his hair in just the right moonlight. She could not remember a night as perfect as the one they had shared. She was very much in danger of falling in love with this man, and after merely a week – she should really scold herself but she just could not. He was so wonderful.

"Did you enjoy the evening Cora?" Robert asked in a raspy voice she had not heard from him before.

"Very much Robert. Thank you once again. It was perfect in almost every way" she did scold herself now, she had said 'almost' and she knew he would catch that. She hadn't meant anything had been lacking, it was just that her mind continued to wonder what it would feel like to be kissed by him and she thought that the addition of a kiss would finally make the entire night perfect in every way. She could not tell him that though, whatever would he think of her?

"Almost?" Robert leaned his head in a little closer as Cora blushed against the gaze of his kind blue eyes on her. She just couldn't say it, she couldn't tell him she wanted to be kissed. It was just too brazen, to bold.

The blush of her cheeks made Robert even more attracted to her. She was a dark haired ethereal beauty and he wanted to kiss the air right out of her lungs. Heaven he wanted to kiss her. He wanted to do all manner of things, but he could not let his mind go there. Perhaps she would like to be kissed? Perhaps he could test the waters a little? When she did not answer his question he pressed on, leaning a little closer to her.

"Cora I only desire to make things perfect for you, if there is anything I can do to take away that 'almost' and make the night perfect, I am at your service to do so" Robert let his hand drop from his knee so that it brushed the side of Cora's leg, he kept his gaze fixed on hers as her eyes widened a little at his touch.

Her voice came out in a softest of whispers, " Oh, Robert, I am sure you could think of something to remove my 'almost'". Cora could not believe the words coming out of her mouth. She was being bold, she could not help it. Being so close to him, feeling his hand brush the side of her leg for that moment, looking into his eyes … it was all too much. When she felt him inch his head even closer so that she could feel the warmth of his breath upon her cheek she shuddered in delight and bit her lower lip softly.

Robert watched her bit down on her lip and let out a sigh. He was going to have to kiss her now, there was only so much he could take, "Cora, may I brazenly ask if I may be allowed to kiss you?" he whispered against her cheek, hoping against all that she said yes. He would be sorely disappointed if she turned him down at this point.

"Yes please" her response was barely audible, but it was all Robert needed to move the last inch toward her lips. He brushed his lip across hers as gentle as a feather and felt the breath leave her body, he closed his eyes for a moment and pressed his lips against hers in earnest. He would have pulled back at that point if not for the little sigh that escaped her lips causing her lips to part slightly beneath his own. With that motion Robert became more eager to taste her. Reaching a hand up to cup her cheek he kissed her more passionately and was thrilled as she responded in like manner. The feel of her lips against his, the warmth of her breath, the way her chest moved up and down with each breath was intoxicating. Robert seized the opportunity and let his tongue enter her mouth as she gasped in what he hoped was delight. She did not pull away, he let his hand leave her cheek and wrap around the back of her neck pulling her into him, his lips moving against hers, his tongue savoring the taste of hers against his. Feeling himself becoming aroused he let out a groan and pulled away, releasing her neck with his hand and sitting back in his place.

"Cora, I … I apologize for taking liberties." He stammered once he felt able to speak.

"Robert Crawley, please do not ruin such a wonderful kiss with such a terrible apology" she smiled at him and looked down, "It was lovely."

Robert swallowed hard. If they were courting in earnest and he wanted to marry her then he would have to make her want the same thing and fast. He could not handle many more kisses like that, he would lose control, he would take advantage, he would do all the things he had imagined and more. He would have to make her fall in love with him, or he might just go crazy.


	8. The Family

"Robert Theodore Crawley what in the devil have you been doing in London? You've been gone a week and you are half way married! To an American girl, of all the ludicrous things to do Robert really?! What ever has happened to your good sense?" Violet Crawley was flabbergasted at the news that reached her upon their arrival in London. She had supposed Robert would attend a ball or too, send his man out to make a few inquiries … not fall immediately into an exclusive courtship with the daughter of an American merchant. It was almost too much for her to take in.

"Mother if you will allow me to explain .." Robert began, but there was no interrupting Violet when she had a cause such as this.

"Honestly Robert. What do you even know about this girl? Her family? Good heavens, I am sure they all just climbed out of their wigwams and dusted themselves off … it's horrid, just horrid" Robert stood a little straighter and found himself growing irritated at the way she was speaking about the Levinson's.

"Mother, I am afraid you are being rather uneducated in this matter. Miss Levinson is the height of grace and decorum, she is well educated and I doubt even you will be able to find fault with the manner in which she conducts herself … although I have no doubt you will try"

"Now Robert, there is no need for that" Patrick Crawley spoke up for the first time since their conversation had begun and Robert took notice. At least now there may be some reason present in this whole affair. "Your mother is surprised to find that in the space of a week you seem to have set your heart on someone to marry, perhaps this is a bit hasty? We are looking to understand this more Robert, as we both know you are not usually so rash and impulsive"

Robert had known he would have to explain things to his parents, he had known his mother would be difficult to deal with … but knowing and doing were 2 different things, and being the middle of this conversation was wearing him out. They came to sit on chairs opposite one another and Patrick motioned for Robert to begin his explanation, the look Violet gave indicated that it had better be a good one. An image of Cora in the carriage last night after their kiss flashed in his mind and he took a breath.

"Thank you father, I would very much like to explain things. Let me say that I have not 'set my heart' on Miss Levinson as you say, but more so I have set my mind on her."

"Well at least you do not fancy yourself in love" Violet huffed.

"Violet, let him finish" Patrick shushed her. Robert continued.

"I met Miss Levinson at the Dumfrey's ball and she was a vision of loveliness and most popular amongst all the guests in attendance. You will see that she is well mannered, cultured and intelligent. She is beautiful and we enjoyed a few very nice moments and a dance or 2." Robert tried to keep his expression plain as he recalled the details, but he was fighting the urge to smile as he thought back on the last week. He told his parents about paying her several calls with her mother, and then walks alone. He explained that they had spent very many hours conversing and he found her company very satisfying and that he enjoyed spending time with her very much. Violet had rolled her eyes at that point but Robert had pressed on.

"You understand of course that I pursued none of this until after I sent Stanley out to gather information on the family … who as it turns out are incredibly wealthy." Patrick's eyes perked up at the words, "The dowry that Miss Levinson comes with upon her marriage is larger than any I have heard of … much larger in fact." Even Violet's eyes widened at this and he saw he had piqued her interest.

"How large?" Violet asked with her eyes narrowing in concentration.

"Large enough to make Downton secure for generations to come mother." Robert could see that this information had done what it was intended to do … it settled both his parents worries on the matter and he saw his father visibly relax.

"Well, why didn't you begin with that information instead of all the fluff about enjoying her company" Violet scolded as she rose to her feet. "It sounds as if you may not be as foolish as I thought, thank goodness for that. I will leave the two of you alone to discuss the details of this. Robert, you and I will talk later … I suppose we shall have to have them over for a dinner party." Violet rubbed her hands together as if this would be most inconvenient and she left the room.

Robert and his father discussed the details of Cora's fortune and what they would be able to do with such funds at Downton, and in the village. Robert could see his father was finally beginning to believe that perhaps Downton would be saved and it gave him the most tremendous sense of pride at being able to be the one to make it so.

"When do you plan to see her next?" Patrick asked as they prepared for luncheon.

"I have not set anything up as I wanted to attend to you and mother first." Robert explained.

"Never mind us Robert, leave your mother to me. If this Miss Levinson is all you say she is then you need to focus on her for the time being." Robert was pleased that his father was in agreement with him on this, and the fact that he would be able to spend time with Cora made it even better. "I should like to get this all squared away as soon as possible" his father finished. Robert felt a feeling of gloom hit him at his father's final words. It sounded so businesslike coming from his father's lips, it sounded so contrived and forced … the very things Robert had been trying to push aside from his thoughts. He had himself a promise that he would never lie to her, he would never tell her feelings he did not have … but he was most assuredly acting just a little. He was not being 100% himself as he felt pressure to move things along at a more rapid rate and so increased his boldness, his compliments, his gestures of kindness in general. Pushing those thoughts aside he took his leave to send a note around to Cora asking to take her out to tea later in the day.

For Cora Levinson the last two weeks had been a whirlwind the likes of which she had never dreamed of. Robert Crawley, Viscount Downton was courting her and doing so in the most affectionate and agreeable manner. He took her for rides in the carriage, both alone and with his sister Rosamond who Cora liked very much. He took her for walks through the park, once they had had a picnic there and even fed the ducks. She had thought him rather adorable as he took care to make sure even the slower ducks got their fair share. He had taken her and her mother out to tea and to dinner. He had called on her for no reason other than to bring her a book they had spoken of and they had taken the opportunity to steal a kiss before he had left. She had stopped keeping count of their kisses as they had begun to become more frequent and Cora found her body responded to the caress of his lips in the most warm and electrifying way. His attentions had been constant and she could not imagine it being any other way. With so little free time she had been neglecting Abigail Wentworth and so it was with great joy that she welcomed her friend in that evening prior to leaving for dinner at the Crawley's London house. It had been Martha who had suggested to Robert that perhaps their friends the Wentworth's join their dinner party and he had made it happen. Cora knew why her mother had suggested such a thing and she could just hug her for it. This was the first time in their 2 week courtship that she would meet his parents. Rosamond she had met and liked, so she had high hopes to enjoy his parents company.

Stealing a few moments by themselves Abigail embraced Cora warmly, "My Cora you have been busy haven't you?" Abigail said giggling; Cora drew her lips into a mischievous smile.

"I will never tell" Cora replied covering her mouth to suppress her own laughter.

"I am so happy for Cora, so very happy." Abigail beamed at her friend and looked down for a moment, "Has he, … has he kissed you Cora?" Abigail blushed at her own question and Cora felt her own cheeks turning red in response. "I believe that is a yes Cora" and with that both girls fell into a fit of giggles.

It was later that evening that Cora sat silently in her room fighting back tears. She had told Besse to leave her and she would take care of herself tonight, she could not bear to make mindless chatter with her maid, she just wanted to curl in a ball and cry giant tears. Tonight had been a slap in the face and Cora could still feel the sting. The evening had not started out badly, she had been happy to see Robert and of course Rosamond was lovely. His father was polite and formal, she hadn't expected much else. But his mother, the way she had looked at Cora like she was some dirt trailed in from the street had made Cora's blood run cold.

Things had taken a turn during dinner as discussion turned to America. Lady Violet had seated Cora at the other end of the table from Robert and next to herself, placing Cora on edge instantly. Lady Crawley had spent the duration of their meal either ignoring Cora's attempts at conversation, making rude comments under her breath, or speaking to her as if she was a simpleton. Cora had endured the meal with a smile on her face casting glances in Roberts's direction, but he was busily conversing with and his father. Cora had told herself to just endure the meal and then she could speak to Robert in the drawing room once the men joined the ladies later.

The drawing room had been a little better as Cora was able to place herself in the company of Abigail and Rosamond while the older women began a game of cards. Cora's eyes kept flitting to the door waiting for Robert to enter, which apparently his mother had noticed as she made a rather rude comment about it in front of all of everyone. Finally the men had entered and she had expected Robert to come and find her straight away and she had made as if to stand, but he crossed to the card table and began to speak with the older ladies once again. Cora had tried to hide her disappointment and rejoined Abigail and Rosamond's conversation. Then she had waited. She waited and waited for him to come and pay her attention yet for the space of an hour he did not so much as glanced in her direction. When he had finally come to see her she had to stop herself from jumping up with excitement. The way she found herself needing his attention made her mad. She had not meant to be so involved with him so quickly. She felt quite the fool.

After joining their conversation for a time Robert asked Cora to join him for a tour of the library and her stomach flipped in anticipation of some time alone with him. He took her arm and led her out of the room and into the library. He showed her his favorite few selections, and gave her a detailed description of the library at Downton as compared to this one. Cora hung on his every word, finally glad to be able to converse with him, and be away from his mother's glare.

"I am sorry it took so long to be able to steal you away Cora" Robert said gently as they stood next to the Shakespeare collection. Cora wondered if Romeo and Juliet were close by and grinned at her silliness.

"I am just glad you were finally able to do so" Cora replied with a flutter of her eyelashes. She knew she was flirting quite shamelessly, but all that waiting for his attention had made her senses heightened and she wanted to keep his attention as long as she had it. She enjoyed the smile that crossed his face and she leaned a little closer so she could almost whisper in his ear, "I have missed you this evening, you have become rather necessary to me I am afraid". She had started to pull back to regain an appropriate distance, but Robert had stopped her from moving by placing his arms upon either side of her upper arms and pulled her back in, crushing against her in an urgent kiss. Cora had felt her insides ignite at the feel of his lips and the closeness of his body. She had felt the pleasure of his tongue slip inside her mouth and the feel of heat the feel of his hands against her arms caused her. She leaned closer voluntarily, and just as she felt him begin to move his hands from her arms to snake behind her back she heard a loud "Ah hem" from the door. Pulling apart instantly Cora looked up to see Lady Violet standing in the doorway looking as though she had discovered something that turned her stomach.

"Really Robert! If you cannot control yourself in public then you shouldn't bother with any of this" she huffed and motioned for him that it was time to leave. He started for the door, forgetting Cora or ignoring her … she didn't know which felt worse. He was almost to the door when she heard his mother tell him in a whisper, "See what comes of dealing with American's", and then he exited the room.

Cora felt abandoned; she was left alone in the library with Robert's mother who had just caught them in an embrace. She was embarrassed, but more than that she was hurt. Robert had left her there to fend for herself against his mother. He had gone, tail between his legs like a scolded little boy. He had never seemed so unattractive to her and it made her feel conflicted. Straightening herself to her full height and keeping her back as straight as a rod Cora began the walking to the door. Violet spoke just as Cora walked past her, her voice dripping with disdain.

"Perhaps in America one frolics in the library, but we are civilized here … do try to remember that" Cora kept her eyes forward, her expression unreadable, and walked out the door.

It was on the carriage ride home that Cora felt like she wanted to cry. She had replayed the events in her head and they had been painful to her. The pain had come when she realized that Robert had either not noticed the way his mother had treated her, or the worst thought of all was that he did not care.

So it was that Cora began to undress herself in the stillness of her room as large tears began to fall.


	9. Moving Forward

Robert knew the night had not gone well. He had almost been dreading it and had fought the uncomfortable feeling in his stomach all day leading up to the dinner party. This would be the first time that he was with Cora and his family. This would be the moment that the 2 Robert's combined and he did not quite know how to manage that. With his family he was much less animated, much less charming and outspoken as he was with Cora. She would expect him to be one way, his family … rather his mother would expect him to be another. He really wished he could be more of the Robert he was when he was with Cora, but he knew his mother would not hold her tongue if she thought his behavior strange, and so he thought It best to be mostly the old Robert, he would do his best.

He had known Cora was looking forward to spending time with him but his mother and Mrs. Wentworth had kept him in conversation for the longest time. He had tried to catch Cora's gaze but she was not looking at him at the right times. He was eager to have time alone with her so he could talk to her, have her to himself for a little time, be the more interesting Robert that he was when he was with her. Robert rubbed his temple as he thought about how badly things had turned out. Their kiss had been intense and delightful … and then it had turned to custard. His mother had discovered them and made the whole thing awkward. Robert had been caught off guard and found himself deferring to his mother's indications for him to leave, and like a total cad he had left without Cora. The shocking thing was that he did not even realize his neglectful behavior until he found himself back in the drawing room without Cora. He felt his stomach drop as he realized he had messed it all up, but he could not go back in there, it was too late. Cora appeared a few moments later and avoided him like the plague.

Pacing in his room that evening he replayed the evening's events in his mind once again. He had told his mother once the guests had left that she had not been as kind to Cora as he had hoped. She had started to argue with him, but had just sighed and said she would try to be less abrasive next time. Robert hoped there would be a next time. Finally he made up his mind and sat at his desk to write a letter. It was late, and rather uncommon, but he needed to do something to appease the feeling of guilt and unease that he had, he needed to know he had tried to leave Cora's evening on a pleasant note instead of an embarrassing one.

When Cora heard the knock at her door she thought it must be her mother come to discuss the evening. But it was the voice of her maid that she heard instead and then the door opened.

"I said I did not need you tonight Besse" Cora snapped, so unlike her, but she did not want to share her tears with anyone.

"I'm sorry Miss, it's just you received a letter just now and I thought you'd rather have it tonight that in the morning" Besse lay the letter on Cora's bed and left the room.

Cora approached the bed with some trepidation. Why would she get a letter at this hour? It must be from Robert, but what would be so important that he couldn't send it tomorrow? Perhaps his mother had convinced him he should not court Cora any longer and he had agreed. He obviously did as she wished and the thought made her hands tremble as she reached for the letter. She opened it cautiously and sat on the edge of her bed and read.

_Dearest Cora, _

_I cannot begin to explain how much I regret the events of this evening._

Cora took in a deep breath and steadied herself for what was coming. He did not want to see her anymore, he was not who she thought he was. She was the worst kind of fool.

_I fear that I may have hurt you and the thought causes me intense pain. It was never my intention to kiss you in the library tonight, but I will admit that I find myself unable to resist you when I look into your sparkling blue eyes. You are beautiful and I have little control of myself around you. Please do not be shocked at the boldness of my words. _

_My mother's interruption caused me such shock that I am afraid I became the little child who felt scolded, I left the room without you and I feel the biggest cad because of it. I am aware my mother can be rather prickly at times; I hope you understand it is not you; it is simply how she is. It is my deepest hope that with more time spent together she will see the wonderful parts of you that I do. _

_I hope that this letter finds you tonight as it was my intention to send you to your dreams with my apology in your head and my fondest feelings of affection towards you expressed. _

_Yours, _

_Robert Crawley Viscount Downton_

Cora read the letter a second time and lay back on her bed with a smile.

Cora found herself smiling from ear to ear as she strolled with Robert through the park and passed their ducks. It had been 2 weeks since the awful dinner party and things since that small hiccup had progressed easily and at rapid speed. Cora knew that she was in love with him. She had felt it the night she had read his letter, she had known he cared about her feelings and had felt her body respond to the words he had written. She had fallen into dreams about Robert that she would be embarrassed to share with anyone. He had awakened a desire in her she had not felt before and she could not imagine ever having it extinguished now. Their time together had grown in frequency and intensity as their courtship progressed. She knew that Robert cared for her a great deal, she knew he was certainly attracted to her. She felt rather wicked, but she had already discovered ways to make him blush. She would accidentally brush his knee with her hand, breath close to his ear, lean against him a little too close and touch the muscular top of his arm. She enjoyed the way his body responded to her touch and stares, it made her feel powerful and womanly. Their kisses had become a daily occurrence and they had found themselves quite adept at finding ways to be alone. The kisses were heated, passionate, all consuming. Cora found herself placing her hands upon his chest and running her hands across his muscular shoulders. It gave her shivers and she knew she wanted more.

There had been two more dinner parties with his family, both were a far cry better than the first. Although she would not call them successful, they were not horrible. His mother was awful at best, Cora could only hope that if they were to marry Lady Violet icy exterior would give way to a warmer center … just a little. Cora hoped.

Walking through the park and conversing with ease Robert steered them down a path away from their usual route. Cora looked at him with a questioning tilt of her head and he patted her arm snaked into his and told her he had a surprise for her. Her stomach flipped. After several minutes more they turned a corner and came into view of a secluded grove of trees. As they approached Cora saw a table and chairs set up with rose petals strewn around it and a delicate afternoon tea set out. She let out a surprised sigh and exclaimed,

"Oh Robert! It is lovely. How sweet of you" she beamed with happiness at the sight set before her and the look of satisfaction on his face. He was sweet, he was kind, she loved him more every day and she looked forward to the day she could tell him so.

Robert was pleased with the way his surprise had turned out, he had been right to leave the details to Rosamond to coordinate, he mentally congratulated himself. It was a flawless afternoon, Cora was smiling and laughing with him, he was enjoying himself, the sun was shining. It was all turning out to be the best of days. He knew Cora loved him. He had seen it in the way her eyes found him every time they were in the same room, he had heard the slight change in her voice in the way she said his name, he had felt it in the eagerness of her kisses. He knew that it was time to ask her the big question, he knew she was ready … he hoped he was. He had been so focused on the mission to save Downton that he had not even given himself the chance to love her. He didn't love her, he knew that. He liked her a great deal, he loved her kisses against his lips … that was enough for him.

As they finished their tea Robert decided it was time to seize the moment. This was what he had planned for, this was what he had worked for. He felt the nerves creep back into his stomach as he fiddled with the lapel of his jacket. Cora looked at him sideways, querying his odd behavior. Taking the opportunity he stood and came around to stand in front of Cora.

"Are you quite alright Robert?" the concern evident in her voice. Robert took a breath and steadied himself, he looked into her eyes to calm himself and dropped slowly onto his left knee in front of her. Cora gasped out loud, her hand flew to her open mouth to cover it for a moment as she prepared herself for what was coming. She broke his gaze for a moment and let her hand drop to her lap and her mouth close once more. It was as he said her name that she looked back at him, tears threatening to fall.

"Cora Levinson." He began, his voice was sincere and his face was sweet, she felt a single tear roll down her cheek.

Robert saw the tear escape laying a trail down her porcelain cheek and he had a sudden pang of guilt. She loved him, she really and honestly loved him … he liked her, lusted after her but she loved him. He thought of Downton and dove on.

"You are most extraordinary, it makes me happy to spend my time with you, would you make me happy everyday by agreeing to be my wife? Will you marry me Miss Levinson?" he felt his heart thump in his chest like a drum. He had done it. He had asked the question that would secure the future of Downton, it was in Cora's hands now, and he waited on his knee for her response.

Looking down at her hands once more Cora took a moment to breathe. He had asked her to be his wife. He wanted to marry her. She felt as though she could fly she was so happy. Looking back into his waiting eyes she drew a smile across her face and reached one hand out to gently touch his cheek.

"Oh Robert. Yes. Yes I will marry you. Nothing could bring me greater happiness than to do so." With that she rose to her feet along with him and before she could stop herself she flung her arms around him and kissed him soundly on the lips. He drew his hands about her waist drawing her closer and molded his body against hers. Her kisses were like fireflies dancing in the darkness, they lighted all his senses and he felt truly alive. Pulling back slightly Cora broke their kiss and he pulled her in for a hug. She felt good in his arms, he felt invincible. He had secured the future of Downton, and he would be married to someone wonderful. He was indeed a happy man.

"Oh Robert, I love you." Cora whispered into his ear … and Robert felt a little of his happiness slide into a sea of guilt.


	10. The waiting game

"Cora" Robert breathed her name against her lips as their kiss deepened and he pressed her gently against the large trunk of the shady tree. She had placed her hands around his neck and was currently sending shivers down his spine by lacing her finger around the hair at the base of his neck and caressing his shoulders. She felt so good against his body, her lips so smooth, her mouth wet and enticing. This was becoming more than he could take. His fiancée was the most beautiful woman he had laid eyes on and he was eager to make her his in every possible way. As if reading his mind Cora flicked her tongue against him in greater passion and he felt her body shiver beneath his touch.

Robert's hands were against her body sending bursts of flame ignite at his touch. One arm had pulled behind her waist crushing them together with the tree trunk at her back. The other had slid down the side of her face caressing gently, before dropping in excruciatingly slow pleasure down the soft skin of her neck, along her shoulder, around the curve of her breath … which caused her to moan into his mouth and kiss plunge her tongue more eagerly against his own. His roaming hand came to rest on her hip, where it joined the flatness of her stomach and she felt her knees go weak. His touch sent her to heaven and she did not know how to control herself when they found themselves like this. It was happening with greater frequency as their engagement continued, Cora knew if they had ever had the chance to be alone for an extended period of time she may just lose her virtue altogether. It shocked her to her core that she didn't think she would even mind. She loved Robert, she craved his touch, relished in the feel of his lips, felt desperately alone when he was not with her. Their fevered coupling against the tree grew to greater heights as Robert lifted his lips from hers and placed them against her neck. It was the first time he had kissed her there and she thought in earnest she would have fallen to the ground had he not had one arm firmly around her waist. His breath was hot against her neck and she leaned against hi lips needing more of what he was giving. She ran her hands further up the back of his head pulling gently at the hair she had threaded into her fingers. His hand that rested against her stomach blazed a trail down her hip coming to rest against her backside lifting her slightly with one hand as he gave it a firm and delightful squeeze. Almost out of instinct Cora lifted the leg connected to that part of her backside and wrapped her leg around his calf.

"Oh my heaven!" Cora breathed, unable to contain the sounds her body was making. He had stirred her into distraction, his tongue and lips against her neck and the now the top of her chest. His body pressed against hers as if they were a single person. His hand squeezing her backside causing her to squirm in delight. "Robert. Oh Robert, oh my gosh, oh"

Robert felt his arousal come to full attention as he pressed against Cora's body. His lips tantalizingly close to her breast and the feel of her backside in the palm of his hand was enough to bring him to the brink. But that coupled with the way she lifted her leg up and around his calf had caused her legs to open just enough that he was pressed directly against her womanhood … he could not think anymore. Damn her dressed, damn his trousers. He wanted her and he wanted her now. She was undoing him with every gasp of pleasure that left her lips. The feel of her hands pulling his hair, the way she felt beneath his touch … he groaned out loud and pushed against her more purposefully.

Cora felt the extent of Robert's arousal against the top of her thigh and it jolted her back to reality. Yes it felt good to be touched by him. Yes she loved him. Yes, yes, yes her body screamed. Her mind took notice of his prodding manhood against her reminded her of her virtue, to pull back, to wait until they were married. That thought coupled with her remaining uncertainty about the actual act of consummating their impending marriage finally caused her to release her grip on his hair and drop her leg,. "Robert" she said breathlessly, "We mustn't" … " We have to stop". She heard Robert let out a frenzied sigh and then felt the coldness envelope her body as the heat of him pulled away from her. She remained where she was, back against the tree trunk and took in the air to her lungs as she smoothed her skirts and gathered herself. She felt for Robert as she watched him take several steps away from her and turned his back to her as he smoothed his hair with his hands. She was not upset by this, she knew he was aroused, she knew he needed to calm down, she knew it was hard for him.

After a few minutes she stepped away from the tree and came up next to him placing her hand in his.

"We shall be married soon my love" she offered with a gentle smile. Robert looked at her and returned her smile.

"I do not mean any disrespect to your father, but if he does not get here soon I may have to punch him square in the jaw when I see him" Cora laughed out loud and knew it was his way of saying he was looking forward to the wedding. "I am sorry Cora, my self control in this area is beginning to come undone. I will take greater care to protect your virtue from now on"

"Well, don't protect it too much" Cora said squeezing her hand.

"That is not helping Cora" he replied with a strained smile. "I think we should return to the house before we get into anymore trouble" he said as he let go of her hand and placed it in the bend of his arm to lead her back through the large garden estate toward the house.

Cora and Martha had come to Downton a month after the engagement. There had been the engagement ball hosted at the Crawley's London home, then several celebratory dinner parties held by some of the Crawley's oldest friends. Eventually it had been decided that it was time to remove them from the distraction of the season and plan the wedding at Downton. It would also give Cora a chance to learn about her new home and become accustomed to the way things were done there. It had been his father's idea to open the long empty Dower house for the Levinson's, thus allowing them their own residence as they waited the last three weeks for the wedding. Mr. Levinson was coming to the wedding, but had needed an extra 2 weeks to settle some business affairs. Robert might actually hurt him if he delayed any further. He was desirous to get things settled with Cora's money, but the overwhelming feeling he had was to take Cora to his bed and discover her body. He had never had a woman affect him this way, he felt happy that she would be his.

It was later that evening as they were gathered in the drawing room after dinner that Cora found herself drawing in her breath in shock. She had covered her mouth with her hand and felt her body go weak as she had made her way back to the chair upon which she had previously been seated. She had overhead something awful and she felt that she could faint. It was then that the men rejoined the ladies and Robert had entered smiling brightly at her before walking past her to speak to Lady Anglesy. He gave her a wink as he crossed her path and set about his duties as host in his home. Cora felt more at ease at seeing Robert, but the fear that had crept in her heart after what she had heard was still there, drumming in the back of her heart and causing her mouth to go dry. It was not true it could not be. She lifted the drink offered her by the footman from the tray and took a large unladylike gulp. Of course it was her mother who noticed her and she received a stern look of disapproval from her.

As they travelled back to the Dower house Martha scolded her for throwing back her drink like a sailor. Cora had told her she was overreacting, to which Martha had expressed her keen displeasure. Half way through her second scolding Cora's mother stopped and looked at her daughter's face, the tears on the brink of falling.

"What is it Cora?" Martha asked concerned. Cora had no choice, she shared what she had overheard and to her pleasure her mother scoffed at it with a swat of her hand.

"Why do you concern yourself with what these people say? Robert is marrying you. You can not wish more than that"

"I'm going to ask him about it" Cora stated matter of factly, her shoulders squaring in a determined line.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you dear. You might not like what you hear" …. And with that the fear that had been drumming in the background paraded through her heart.


	11. A painful truth

Cora paced the floor of the Dower house living room as she waited for Robert to arrive. He came at the same time each day and had tea with her while her mother busiest herself in the next room. Some days they had taken a walk to the village, some days they stayed in and read excerpts of their favorite books to each other, and then on the best days they had taken the carriage to Downton and walked the grounds. Those were the days they had let their hands roam across each other's bodies and the heat between them and grown. But today Cora was not planning on any of that. She had to ask him. She had to know the truth. Although in her heart she dismissed it as a bald face lie, in her mind she had gone over all the things he had told her, all the things he had said and she was not entirely sure. It was early this morning when she realized that he had never said that he loved her, he had said other words and endearments, but never that. Perhaps it was an oversight, perhaps he was saving the declaration, perhaps … well, she didn't want to think on that perhaps. She had been so free with her 'I love yous' since the engagement; she had not noticed that she was not getting any back.

When Robert finally arrived Cora felt as though she had paced a hole in the floor. He greeted her with his usual warm smile and took her hands, but he stopped halfway as he leaned down to kiss her cheek.

"Cora are you quite alright?" she looked drawn, her eyes carried a sadness he didn't care to see in them and he could tell she was agitated.

"Only you can answer that Robert" she said quietly. The tone in her voice brought him to a standstill and he knew straight away that something was amiss.

"I will do anything to help you, of course I will, come let's sit and find a way" he showed her to the couch taking the seat across from her so he could look into her eyes and see her face. His stomach was in knots as he pondered what could make her feel this way"

"It's quite simple really Robert. Tell me you love me and it will all be well" Cora knew she was being too abrupt, too demanding, but she knew what she needed to hear and what her heart required of him. She saw Robert's eyes grow wide and her heart broke into a million pieces. She had her answer. They were right, what she had heard was the truth.

"I … what? Cora, what is the matter? I adore you, you know that." Robert knew that somehow she knew his true motives and it caused him to panic just a little. He could not fall short of saving Downton, not when he was so close.

"You adore me, but you do not love me … I see." Cora rose to her feet and walked away from him, Robert stood and followed. This was not happening. He had to save Downton, he had to. He wanted to marry her as well. He truly did … what was love when it came to that?

"Cora, I … "

"Please don't!" Cora whipped around and he saw her eyes glassy with tears, his stomach knotted at the sight and he felt sick. He made to speak again but she held her hand up to stop him. "If you cannot tell me you love me then tell me that your motives in pursuing me were not my impressive dowry? Tell me that and I shall be happy"

Robert's mouth had gone dry. He could not tell her a lie, he would not lie to her and he hung his head to escape her gaze.

Cora took a deep breath. She had known it was true when she heard Violet Crawley and her guest last evening. She had known it in her bones, but now she knew it in her heart and it hurt worse than anything she could imagine.

"Tell me you would marry me now, even without my dowry Robert? Hmm? How about that?" she had kept her voice low, but the anger in it was clear.

"I can't" was all he could muster and she made as if to leave the room.

"Cora wait, I …" Robert tried to think, tried to think what he could say to her.

"What should I wait for Robert? Have you suddenly grown a heart? You are ready to profess your love in order to receive my money?" Cora knew that was harsh, but she was hurting, she did not care.

"I have never lied to you Cora, and I never will" Robert said gently, the sadness in his eyes was clear and she thought she saw a tear welling in the corner of them. She looked away, broken hearted or not she could not stop loving him. She headed for the door and stopped in the doorway, her back still toward him.

"You knew what I wanted from a marriage, and still you pursued me in this manner … is that not a lie Robert?" … and with that she walked out of the room.


	12. A truth worth hearing

Her mother eyed her with a certain degree of interest as if trying to figure out the thoughts running through Cora's head without speaking a word. Cora forced her face into a clean slate, hoping she would give nothing away. She did not think she could discuss this with her mother, not now.

"You asked him about his motives didn't you" it was not a question for they both knew she was right. How she could read Cora was always such a bother to her. What gave her away? She had tried to be so unreadable … perhaps that was her first give away.

"I may have" Cora tried to keep up the illusion, but her mother's eye's narrowed in a knowing way and Cora could not keep it in, "Fine, yes I did ask him. I asked him and he told me and now I know." There was not a single ember of joy in Cora's voice, she was trying to push all the emotions out, for if she let any emotions in she would feel them all come crashing upon her. He did not love her, his motives had been financial, she really was just a prize. She turned her back to her mother not wishing to give anything away.

"Cora I really don't know how you did know before anyway" how she could act so casually about this was baffling to Cora, in fact it enraged her. She clenched her fists at her side and spun back around, the almost bored expression her mother wore pushed Cora over the edge and she did something she had only ever done twice before in her life, both times with disastorous results … she raised her voice at her mother.

"How didn't I know? Because we don't all walk around thinking about socially advantageous matches mother. Not all of us primarily concerned with selling their daughter to the highest bidder. I didn't know, I didn't know , I didn't know because he acted so kind and gentlemanly and sweet, and I fell for it like a fool I fell head over heels and now I am left broken hearted and you act as if this whole thing bores you to tears. Mother how could you?!" tears stung in the corners of her eyes and she took a giant breath to try to calm herself. She expected her mother to scold her for her insolence, to chastise her for the way she had spoken, for her rude comments. She expected her mother to order her to marry Robert anyway, the engagement had been announced and there would be scandal to break it off. She expected to not like what was coming her way … but as she felt her mother's arms pull her into a hug she let the tears in her eyes fall and found herself sobbing into her mother's shoulder as she patted her on the back.

"Now now, it's alright" Martha soothed as she patted Cora's back and led her to the couch to sit. After several tearful minutes Martha pulled back and straightened her arms gently pushing Cora away so she could see her face. "Dry your eyes darling" she said with a smile handing Cora a handkerchief, "and let us think about this shall we?" Cora dabbed at her eyes softly and patted the handkerchief against her cheeks. Her mother was always full of surprises, crazy as she made her she loved her mother with all her heart.

"Now, let us think about this Cora. You have been surprised by the motives Robert had when he began to court you, and yet I am not in the least surprised. I blame myself really, I thought you would have known as I did that it would not be just your beauty and company the English Lords would be interested in, but your very impressive dowry" Cora spoke up, of course she had known that, she was not a complete idiot, she just didn't think it was like that with Robert.

"Mother I knew that, of course I did. I just didn't think it was that way with Robert. He made it all seem so romantic, when really it is just a business deal to save Downton."

Now Martha frowned, "Cora" her voice held a tone of irritation, "you make Robert sound very calculating and I do not agree. Yes, he was interested in your money, he is not a fool, but I cannot believe he lied to you in any way. Did he ever tell you he wasn't after your money? Did he ever tell you he loved you?"

Cora shook her head no, Martha continued, "He has not mislead you my dear, I am sure he assumed you knew as we all know the motivations behind this union. I have seen how happy he has made you, how well suited you are together, there is really not a problem except you feel foolish … and that darling is just your pride hurting" Martha patted Cora's hand and it made Cora angry all over again.

"Do I not deserve to be loved? How can I marry him if he does not love me? How can I do that?" Cora turned her head from her mother afraid more tears would come.

She heard her mother release a sigh before speaking, "Cora, you are being rather dramatic. Very few people in our circle marry for love, or love alone. You have found a man, an Earl who cares for you deeply … it is plain that he cares for you. Perhaps that is not love, but love may come … and if it doesn't, he will always treat you well."

Cora could not believe her ears, this was supposed to make her feel better? It made her feel sick to her stomach. She loved him, she couldn't stop despite what she now knew, and now she would be the fool in the marriage, the one who loved the most and could never be truly happy. She turned back to Martha "So it's fine for you to be in love when you marry but not me? That's most unfair mother" Cora knew she sounded like a child, but it was all driving her to distraction.

"I never said I was in love when I married your father" it was like a bomb had been dropped on Cora. Her face betrayed her surprise and for a moment she did not think of Robert or her feelings of betrayal.

"What?" Cora asked.

"I did not love you father when we married Cora, it is not a secret." Martha acted as if this was the most natural sentence in the world. Cora's world was tipping on its end.

"But, but, you and father love each other. What do you mean? Father has told me how much he loved you when you married, how much you took his breath away when he saw you walk down the aisle … he told me, and he is not a liar mother." Cora almost dared Martha to contradict her father, she knew she could not.

"He did not lie, your father loved me when we were married that is entirely true, but I did not feel the same. Well, perhaps that is not entirely true … I did not know that what I felt was love. I liked him a great deal, he was definitely a good match for me, his prospects were good and he loved me. How could I refuse an offer like that?" Martha smiled at the memory and looked over Cora's shoulder into the open space for a moment, as if reliving the past.

"Weren't you scared you may never have loved him?"

"Not at all. He was very good to me Cora. He was kind and loving, and wanted to take care of my every need. I knew no matter what he would love and care for me and I would always like him and that would be enough."

"But what changed?" Cora could not believe the story her mother had told her, how did she not know this?

"Well it only took a few weeks really and I knew that I did love him, I was just terribly afraid of my feelings … they often get in the way of good judgement when it comes to these things." Martha watched her daughter try to take in the words she had just heard and deicded she needed some time by alone, so she rose to her feet to leave. "Cora, I want you to be happy, of course I do. I know you are upset, you have always felt things so tenderly, so much your father's daughter in that regard. But I would like you to think of a few things before you make any rash decisions. How does Robert make you feel? Your feelings are not contrived in any way, and he has not lied to you so his feelings are real … they are not what you want but they are real. I know that you have been terribly terribly happy with him and that is not something that will change, your married life will bring you closer together and maybe one day he will find himself in love with you. But if he doesn't, you still love him and he has still chosen you. It doesn't matter much why." With that Martha took her leave and Cora was left sitting on the couch alone with her thoughts, and her terribly broken heart.


	13. Notes

Robert did not go to Cora the day of his confession. He thought it best she be allowed some space. Instead he sent a note to let her know he was thinking of her, he didn't know what else he could do.

_Dearest Cora, _

_I am terribly sorry for the way in which we parted last. It has never been my desire to cause you pain and I am very sorry to have done so. I would very much like to see you, but I am sure you would rather me stay away just now and so I will attempt to show you how much I do care for you by doing just that. _

_Yours, Robert Crawley_

He was going to add his title as was his custom, but decided she may feel it a slap in the face after their fight. He sent the note and waited another day. It was some strange form of torture to not hear from her, to not have a plan of when they would next be together. He knew he did not love her, but he did very much enjoy spending time with her, he did very much enjoy walking with her in the garden of the estate, and he did very much enjoy letting his lips find hers in the quiet moments they found themselves alone. It was not love, but he was very happy to marry her … not just for the money.

Of course his mother was constantly in his ear about going over there and demanding she get over it, and Robert could tell his father was nervous things were about to fall apart leaving them once again in danger of losing Downton. Robert willed himself to stay calm, he had told her he would give her space, and space he would give her. But he did send another note.

_Dearest Cora, _

_Please know that I did not sleep a wink last night as I lay awake and thought of how much I must have hurt you and how deeply I regret having done so. When you are ready I would very much like to be able to call on you, to explain to you how very happy I have been at the thought of marrying a woman of your intellect, humor and beauty. _

_Yours, Robert Crawley_

It was on the 3rd day that Robert decided he needed to step up his plan. He could not see her as he had told her he wouldn't, but he could communicate with her in the very best ways he knew how. He took himself for a long walk and found a deep red rose of exquisite form and color. He picked it and sent it with his note.

_Dearest Cora, _

_While walking through the grounds at Downton I saw this magnificent rose, its beauty and elegance reminded me of you. Please accept it as a symbol of my sorrow for your pain, and my pledge to be a better man for you. _

_Yours, Robert Crawley_

And so it was that every day for a week Robert Crawley, Viscount Downton sent Miss Cora Levinson a note with a perfect flower from the Downton gardens, much to his mother's annoyance. Violet Crawley could not see how any woman from Cora's 'new money' background could even think of walking away from a marriage proposal with her son, the future Earl of Grantham. Robert was Cora's social superior in Violet's estimation and she should be ecstatic at the match her father's money had bought her. Robert had physically flinched at those words "the marriage her father's money had bought her" and left the room in haste. He had spoken with his father, asked him to please talk with his mother, encourage her to keep her feelings on that particular matter to herself from now on. If not for Cora, for Robert. His father saw the wisdom in his request and agreed to help in this regard.

He knew his mother came across cold, stiff, the epitome of English breeding and manners and she was in fact all those things. But she was also his mother, though like most of his kind he had been raised by the nannies his parents hired and sent away to Eton for his schooling. But as he had matured into adulthood he had come to know her better and knew that even if she had a prickly exterior her heart was in the right place. Robert knew Violet would not intentionally mean to hurt Cora, but she would train her, critique her, mold her into a future countess. He did not want Cora to feel awkward once they married, constantly reminded about the money that bought her into their family, the changes of living in a new country without all she had previously known would be hard enough, the less she was reminded about the money the better. This of course all supposed Cora Levinson still planned to marry him. She had been very angry, but perhaps worse than that she had been incredibly sad, he had seen it in her eyes, in the fall of her shoulders. He had known her deepest dreams of marriage and he had pursued her anyway, she had the right to be mad and he knew it. No, he had never lied – but he didn't have to, he knew what he was doing and he did it anyway.

He sent her another note after breakfast 7 days since their last meeting. Not only was he worried about the future of Downton, he was worried what he had done to her. How was she? He wished he could go see her, but he would not break a promise or lie to her ever. She deserved as much from him.

_Dearest Cora, _

_I find myself thinking about you and wondering how you are. I continue to move forward in plans for our wedding in the hope that there will still be one, as I would very much like to be married to you. I know that I cannot say that I love you and that was something you made clear from the start that you wanted in a match. I am afraid my stiff English heart may not know how to do that as freely as your sweet American one does. But do please believe me when I say that I have never lied to you in my affection for you. It may not be love, and perhaps that will not be enough for you, but every word I ever told you has been a truth. I do find you as lovely as warm breeze in the summertime, I do find your humor refreshing, and looking into your eyes does cause my pulse to race. You are divine, and in lieu of love I would offer you my devotion as a husband and my time as your friend. I sincerely hope to see you soon. _

_Yours Robert Crawley_

_Your Robert._

He had done all he could. As far as laying it out there that was what Robert could muster. It was true, of course it was. He would be a devoted husband to her, he would be kind and generous and try to make her happy. Love? He hoped she could accept him without it, but knew she just might not and it made him nervous. Downton was on the line. His future was hanging in the balance. Finally as he walked out of the dining hall from luncheon on that 7th day a footman brought him a letter on a silver tray. He could tell it was Cora's feminine script and he opened it hastily.

_Dear Robert, _

_You may pay me a call at your earliest convenience. _

_Cora Levinson. _

"Harrison" Robert called to the footman, "Have them saddle my horse right away",


	14. Truce

Robert rode his horse as quickly as he dared across the fields of the Downton estate and in the direction of the Dower house. Cora had finally broken her silence and he felt the combined feelings of fear and excitement bubble inside him. He was unsure what he would find when he arrived at the Dower house. Cora had given no clue as to what she had decided and he was anxious to find out.

Cora stood in the room that had become hers the last few weeks and looked out the window, her hand placed delicately against the curtain. She had told him to come, she wondered how long it would take him? Would he rush straight there in haste? Would he wait until later? Would he come at all? She scoffed at herself for thinking that way, she knew he would come. If not because of what his letters had said she knew he would come … there was too much money at stake. It made her heart hurt a little each time she thought that way, each time she reminded herself that he had pursued her for the cash. Love him as she did, she felt it may not be something she would ever truly recover from. Hearing the sound of hooves approaching Cora squinted through the window and saw Robert riding up on his horse. She had not expected him that fast. She had sent the letter not even an hour before, less than that she was sure, and yet here he was getting off his horse and approaching the door. She supposed it was time, and she rang the bell for Besse.

Robert entered the house and was escorted to the empty drawing room. It was this room that had been the scene of their last meeting, he hoped and prayed this one would end better than the last. He stood next to the window and gazed out into the garden as he waited, wondering what dress Cora was wearing today, how she had styled her hair, what she had been reading this week? He had genuinely missed her company and he was eager to see her again. He waited for possibly 10 minutes next to that window and still no-one came. Finally he heard the door open and close and he turned slowly ready to look into her eyes and beg forgiveness for hurting her. He was stopped in his tracks at the sight.

"Please take a seat" he said. Robert looked around the gentleman trying to see where Cora was, "She is not coming yet, you may have a seat" the man insisted rather gruffly. Robert did not know who he was speaking with, yet he thought perhaps he could hazard a guess. If he was right, he was most assuredly in the fieriest pits of hell. Walking slowly Robert walked to the nearest seat and did as he was told.

"Allow me to intr…" Robert began trying to introduce himself, he was interrupted.

"I know who you are" this man could care less about proper manners and Robert's estimation of him. He was not playing games either, one look into his eyes and you could see he had nerves of steel and would do whatever it took to get what he wanted.

"Then you are ahead of me sir, I can guess at who you are but perhaps …" Robert was trying to keep things cordial, but he felt as though his world was slipping out of his hands. This man was here to give Robert his marching orders and it caused Robert a fear that he had never before experienced. He was interrupted yet again.

"I am the man who will have you ripped apart by wild dogs if you bring my daughter to tears once more. Am I clear on that point?" Isidore Levinson was a man who did everything that needed to be done, damned the consequences. It had served him well in business and it had won him the woman of his dreams. But, when it came to his daughter he would do it all and then some. He had arrived the day before, surprising both Martha and Cora at being there early. He had concluded his business sooner than expected and had left the follow up with Harold. He had thought he would be walking into a sea of wedding parties and Cora's smiling face, instead what he had found was his daughter heartbroken and disillusioned and it had made him mad. You simply didn't make Isidore Levinson mad if you were a smart man.

Robert swallowed hard and nodded his head. Cora's father had arrived, he as both relieved and terrified at the same time.

"I did not hear you boy" Isidore would make this as difficult for Robert as he could, he would let him know you did not mess with his daughter, not even a little.

"Yes sir" Robert managed to speak with a firm voice, he was glad, the last thing he needed was to sound like a sniveling child.

Isidore sat quietly for several minutes staring at Robert who sat still in his chair saying nothing. He had figured out this game now, was in charge, he would do the talking and Robert would do the listening. He was the future Earl of Grantham and someone that people usually treated with dignity and respect, something he himself demanded. But in this instance he knew it was his turn to sit still and shut his mouth. For Downton. For Cora.

After regarding the young man for several minutes Isidore stood, Robert followed suit and rose to his feet as well. Isidore took one step closer to Robert and rose to his full height before he spoke, "For some reason Cora loves you despite how you have hurt her. She is tender hearted, she is young, and she is my only daughter. I give you permission to marry her simply because _she_ wants it to be so. Should she ever send word that she no longer wishes it to be so I will make that happen so quickly it will make your head spin. I will descend upon you and your family with lawyers enough and I will rip my daughter's dowry from you grasp and ruin your family in the process. You know my worth, you know I can do what I say."

Robert nodded silently, Isidore made to leave and turned just before he reached to open the door, looking Robert dead he spoke once more, "I meant what I said about the wild dogs" and he turned and left the room.

Robert stood as still as a statue and let out a breath he was not aware he had been holding. So _that_ was Isidore Levinson. The man Cora loved with all her heart. His future father in law, as it seemed that the wedding was indeed on, Cora loved him still, he had her father's permission … albeit with the most severe of warnings. He did not know if he was supposed to wait there to see Cora or if that was what he had been asked to come for? Robert was not often confused in social situations and feeling that way made him nervous and he felt he might perspire. Stay or go? He walked back to the window for a moment and looked outside, he did not know what he was looking for exactly, but it gave him something to do.

"Was it terrible with papa?" the sound of her voice caused Robert to whip around in a flash. He had not heard her enter the room, but there she stood in its center, her body draped in a dress of cream and peach that made her look almost angelic. His stomach flipped in excitement at seeing her again. She was more beautiful than he remembered, her hair the color of the night sky and there were several ringlets falling around her neck drawing attention to the delicate features of her face. He let out a breath as he said her name.

"Cora" he began to walk towards her but she held her hand up for him to stop and he had another wave of panic wash over him.

Cora looked down at her hands after she stopped Robert from approaching her. She knew her father had been vicious with him, and she was glad for it. It would do him a little good to be spoken to that way, to know a little of the feeling that came from being powerless. Cora had felt that way all week. Powerless to change the way she felt about him, destined now to be married to a man that did not love her and she could not stop it because deep down she did not want to. She looked back up at him and straightened her back, her eyes found his and locked them in place.

"I am going to speak Robert and you are going to listen" he nodded, she continued, "What I am going to say I am going to say once, and then we shall never speak of this. I gave you my heart and you broke it. A piece of me died when I felt your betrayal. Despite that I still love you, except now as well as love you a small part of me hates you as well. I hope in time that the love will override the other emotion, but one cannot predict their feelings." This was harder than she thought it would be, but she took a quick breath and kept going, she had to do it, "I do not expect you to love me as I once did, but what I do demand from you is honesty first and always. I will not settle for less than that." She turned her eyes away from his and after several seconds quietly added, "that is all, I am done now". She had spent so much time thinking on what she wanted to say to him, how to best express herself, how she imagined it would be that she had not even considered what she should do at the end of it. So she stood in the middle of the room with her hands at her sides and her head turned away to avoid his gaze. She was exhausted from the emotional week that had passed, and if she was honest she wanted nothing more than to be caught up in the warmth and strength of his arms.

Robert stood for a moment and watched Cora simply standing there unable to look at him. He felt he might cry at what he had done to her. She almost looked beaten down, but for the rise of her chin that gave her a quiet strength. He did not know what to do or say, so he deferred to his body to lead the way. He crossed the room to her and placed reached out to gently let his fingers caress the side of her temple and down to her cheek where he felt her lean into his hand. His hand ignited at the feel of her skin once again and he felt his stomach stir. With his other hand he lifted it to gently place her chin between his thumb and fingers and turn her face to his. Looking into her eyes he spoke from the depths of his soul, "If I should live a thousand years I could never express to you how sorry I am for hurting you." There was nothing more he could say about it. It was done, he had broken her heart and she loved him still. He had apologized and she had accepted. Neither of them could ever be the same because of it, but it was over at least.

Cora felt the gentleness of his touch against her face and fought the urge to cry. She had missed his touch, she had missed him. He was sorry, she knew that was true. She knew he wouldn't lie to her, he never had. She had decided she would love him enough for the both of them and somehow it would all be ok. As he leaned his face toward hers she closed her eyes and felt the brush of his lips across her lips once again, the softness of them, the tenderness behind them. She melted against him wrapping her arms around his neck and drawing him closer kissing him more soundly. She would love enough for the both of them, and she would start with this kiss.


	15. They Do

The sun rose giving way to a beautifully clear sky that morning. It was the finest kind of day that England offered, a soft breeze accentuating the brightness and warmth of the sun. As Cora looked out through the curtains of her room at the Dower house she had the distinct thought that this was the perfect sort of day to have a wedding. Her left hand held the curtain slightly parted so she could see the perfect day that had dawned and as she cast her eyes out to see the view she once again caught sight of the diamond ring Robert had given her last week. The light caught the cut of the diamonds and sparkled in response. It should have made her feel incredibly happy, so terribly terribly happy in fact. A bride wakening on her wedding day to the most perfect day, the most perfect ring, the most perfect groom … and yet she could not bring herself to smile. She had told Robert they would not speak of that dreadful business again and she had meant it. She had told herself she would love enough for the two of them and she had meant that too. During the last 2 weeks leading to this day she had in fact been wonderfully happy, a bride on the brink of heaven in fact. She had made the final plans with her mother and Violet, walked the grounds with Robert, showed her father about the village, giggled with Rosamond and then Abigail when she had finally arrived days ago. She had been happy, but as this morning dawned the perfection of the day seemed to mock her. Her wedding day had arrived clear and bright and perfect. The wedding itself promised to be the likes of which no-one had seen, her mother sparing no expense, the Crawleys providing guests of prominent and inspiring position, her dress was perfection in white. Everyone commented at the garden tea they had held 2 days prior what a fine pair she and Robert made, the most perfect match, so handsome together, the most excellent blend of the old and the new. Everything was perfect, and the perfection knocked on the door of that locked room in her heart where she had stored away her pain. Everything was perfect, except the one thing she had wanted most of all. Her groom did not love her and it tore away at her heart a little more every day.

Robert arrived at the breakfast table with a bounce in his step and a grin on his face that even a blind man would be able to see. The day had arrived and from the look out his bedroom window it was going to be perfection itself. He couldn't have ordered a more perfect day if he had phoned Mother Nature herself and sent her a gift basket. The day had arrived and in a matter of hours Downton would be safe forever. Just last evening his father had told him how proud he was that Robert had saved Downton, and how pleased he was for him to be married. They had toasted with champagne and discussed more plans for Cora's dowry. Finding his seat next to his cousin Patrick he said a chipper good morning and joined the other men at the table. His father had already had his breakfast being a very early riser, but he was joining a table of 4 men, his cousin Patrick, friend and best man Lord Albert Rawlings, his parent's friend Sir Michael Hemleigh, and of course his cousin Susan's new husband Shrimpy.

"How did you sleep last night old boy? Any pre wedding nerves?" Patrick asked with a grin and a slap on Robert's back. Robert barely escaped choking on the egg he had just taken a bite of.

"Steady on" Robert replied amid several coughs, he took a sip of water and added, "There won't be much of a wedding if the groom chokes to death the morning of"

"Or much of a wedding night for that matter" Patrick laughed at his own joke and Robert saw a small smile play on Shrimpy's lips. Robert rolled his eyes, what had he expected coming down to breakfast with a room of men the morning of his wedding? At least they were getting it out now when there was no chance of any ladies hearing.

"Should I draw you a diagram Robert or do you think you'll be alright?" Robert almost spat out his toast at Patrick's statement.

"Alright Patrick, we get the point" Robert said calmly. He knew the way men talked when they were alone, he had been at Eton for years, enjoyed his time at the men's social clubs in London and he didn't have much of a problem with it most of the time. He had joined in from time to time, but he was tame next to Patrick and always had been. He knew what Patrick was like, he had expected some good natured jokes with the lads, but for some reason as he listened to Patrick and then Albert join in with their insinuations and comments about he and Cora's wedding night it made him irritated and put his back up. He couldn't pin point what it was, but he didn't like it and he concentrated on ignoring them altogether and finishing his breakfast. This only spurred them on further with Albert saying almost under his breath.

"Better eat up Robert, you'll need your strength for later tonight", of course it was just loud enough for Patrick to hear and laugh aloud. Shrimpy hadn't joined in, but even he had smiled at several of their teasing words. He had married Susan about a year ago and Robert enjoyed his company very much, but even Shrimpy's presence couldn't keep Robert at the table any longer and he settled his napkin on the table about to ready himself to leave. It was then that Patrick's comment came and Robert rose to his feet outraged.

"Look Robert, perhaps if a diagrams no good I could find the time in my busy schedule to just show you how it works myself, she is a gorgeous little piece you have there so I really wouldn't mind. The money alone is enough to turn you on and …"

"One more word from you Patrick Crawley and I will ring your bloody neck." Robert was incensed as he flew to his feet, his blood near to boiling and his fists clenched automatically. Leaning closer Robert drew all the fierceness into his eyes that he could and spat the last words at his cousin, "If I hear you talk of my wife that way again, I will rip you apart. You don't speak of her, you understand that Patrick?"

Patrick nodded taken a back at Robert's outburst, "Of course, of course. I … apologize Robert, I meant no harm in it" and before he could say any more Robert had turned and stalked out of the room leaving the 4 men behind exchanging glances one with the other. After several minutes Patrick Crawley wiped his mouth with his napkin and stood to leave. "I apologize to you all, honestly, if I had known he loved the girl I would have kept my mouth shut".

Cora's mood had not changed since she had woken that morning and it was causing the most extreme case of panic to well inside her. This was her wedding day, she was supposed to be happy and excited and smiling, and all she could do as Besse worked on her hair was stare out the window at the perfect day outside. Every ray of sunshine beaming from the sky reminded her that she would be the only one standing at the alter today who was in love. It made her feel incredibly lonely. She wanted to be happy today, she loved Robert … that should make her happier than anything, but whenever she thought of how much she loved him she was reminded as quickly as a slap to the face that he didn't feel the same way. It was as if every time she was reminded of that fact it tore another piece of her heart out, and she wondered how much more of her heart she had left. A knock came at the door jolting her out of her thoughts. The footman had delivered a note for her, with a single rose … it was from Robert, she didn't have to look at the writing to know. She dismissed Besse for a few moments while she read the note.

_Dearest Cora, _

_This morning has dawned as perfect as your smile, as magnificently warm as your heart, as refreshing as your humor and it makes me most glad. If I could have placed an order for the perfect wedding day for you I most assuredly would have, and I feel the heavens must be shining down on us today. I am about to go down for my last breakfast as a bachelor and I am honestly thrilled about it. Before I met you Cora I did not realize that I had been living alone. Now I feel as if I need you with me so that I can be the man I am supposed to be. I hope your last morning as a Levinson is happy and well, for when you wake tomorrow it shall be as Cora Crawley, Viscountess Downton, future Countess of Grantham … but more important than all of that you shall from today and forever be my wife._

_Your most affectionate (almost husband) Robert._

Just as Cora read the last line her mother walked in to see how things were progressing, and Cora burst into tears.

"Cora, what in heaven's name are you crying for? It is your wedding day! You will make your face blotchy and red now stop it, stop it this instant" Martha tried to get Cora to stop the tears but Cora could barely hear her mother's words, all she could hear were the words of Robert's letter "your most affectionate" … it should have said love, but of course it did not and she felt she would break in two if she couldn't get this awful sadness out of her body. Eventually Cora handed her mother the letter to read as she continued to sit on her bed sobbing. Abigail had heard the commotion and came in to see what the matter was. Seeing Cora crying on her bed and Martha standing and reading a letter she knew had arrived from Downton she thought the worst and ran to her friend's side throwing her arms around her.

"Oh Cora dear I am so sorry. So terribly sorry" she said gently as she stroked Cora's back and held her in her arms.

"It's awful Abigail, just awful" Cora continued to cry and Martha looked up from reading the letter long enough to roll her eyes.

"Honestly Cora" she huffed as she placed the letter on the desk in the corner. Abigail continued to hold Cora close, furious at the way Martha was handling the situation. How could she be so cruel? It was a blessing that her own mother entered the room when she did because Abigail was about to scold Mrs. Levinson and that would be something she would never have lived down.

"What on earth is going on? I heard crying and then saw Abigail running down the hall like a wild woman" Mrs. Wentworth looked from Abigail and Cora on the bed, to Martha standing with her hands on her hips in the corner. It was Martha who spoke.

"Oh, it is just my daughter being dramatic" she said with a grand flourish of her hand, the irony of her statement was not even lost on herself.

Abigail could contain herself no longer, "Mrs. Levinson" she said in as much a respectful tone as she could, "How can you say such a thing when poor Cora has been treated so harshly?!" Abigail was absolutely aghast at the entire scene.

"What in heaven's name are you talking about girl?" Martha asked beginning to lose her patience with both girls seated on the bed. Abigail looked like she could murder Martha and Mrs. Wentworth could see that her daughter was about to say something very wrong indeed.

"Abigail, what has happened darling, do please tell me" Mrs. Wentworth said, trying to get Abigail's attention away from Martha. Abigail softened her voice and turned her head towards her mother, still holding Cora in her arms.

"Robert has cancelled the wedding mother" she explained gently. It was as if someone had turned a switch and Cora's tears stopped in an instant, her head flung up off her friend's shoulder and she pulled far enough away as to look in Abigail's face.

"What?!" Cora said almost with a laugh.

"What?!" Martha said almost at the same time, her tone leaning closer to one of irritation than humor.

"What?!" Mrs. Wentworth asked in complete confusion, all eyes moved to Abigail and her face felt suddenly warm.

"Robert has called off the wedding." She said again slower, "I saw the letter arrive from Downton" she began explaining as Martha huffed and waved her hand in dismissal at her, Cora's hand slowly rose to her mouth to suppress a giggle, "an an and, then I heard Cora crying, a a an and, then Cora said it was awful and the letter had been read – I just thought, I mean, what else could it have been on your wedding day?" It was clear to Abigail that she had gotten it wrong. She was most embarrassed and wished she could just be a little less spontaneous at times like this. "If not that then what?" she asked as Cora had broken into near full hysterics and Martha had opened the armoire to ready Cora's dress.

"Good heaven's girl" Martha said not even bothering to turn around, "It was a note Robert sent to Cora explaining how happy he is for their marriage, nothing more"

"Then, I don't understand why you have been crying so much Cora. Why was that awful?" Abigail was a little irritated now; it seemed she was being made the fool when it was everyone else acting foolish.

Martha ignored Abigail's words as one would an annoying bee flitting around the room, with a flick of the hand. Cora took deep breaths to stop herself from laughing, and Mrs. Wentworth now satisfied that all was well left the room once more. After a few minutes, once Cora and contained herself she took Abigail's hands in hers and spoke.

"Oh Abigail I am sorry, you are very sweet to want to comfort me, but you are very wrong about the letter. Robert wrote as mother said." Cora's voice was crisp, it was strong, there was life in it where earlier there had been none, "You see, I discovered a while ago that Robert's main reason for pursuing me was for my money and it upset me. We quarreled about it, but we reached a place where we were both very happy and wanted to marry regardless." Cora's explanation surprised even herself.

"Then why the tears?" Abigail asked once more.

Cora shrugged, "I suppose it is a mixture of nerves and excitement" well now she was just straight out lying to her friend, but after the wonderful fit of giggles and Abigail's ridiculous thinking Cora could not go back and explain in detail how full of sorrow she had been earlier. Somehow she had blown the cobwebs away, she had shoved the pain back in the door and locked it again. Hearing Abigail announce Robert had called off the wedding had snapped Cora out of herself and caused her both humor and reflection. She was terribly terribly happy to be marrying Robert. The man she loved, the man who made her heart beat faster and her pulse quicken with delight. Who made her laugh and think, who gave her flowers and read her books, who stole moments with her in the garden and in the hallway. She wanted to be his wife, she wanted this and she knew she could never be happy with anyone else – not while Robert Crawley walked the earth. She would love him enough for the 2 of them just as she had planned. All of that love would start today after she walked down the aisle at the church, and tonight … she shivered in anticipation and bit her lip … tonight … she could not think straight thinking about tonight. She stood quickly and shoo'd them all out so she could get ready. Tonight, she thought again. Tonight I will show him just how happy he should be to have me as his wife.


	16. Cherish

"That will be all for now Besse" Cora said softly looking at her maid through the reflection in her mirror. Besse nodded looking at her toes slightly embarrassed knowing what she was leaving Cora for. The maid's response did not pass Cora's notice and she inhaled a deep breath in anticipation.

"Have they made you comfortable here? You have a room and everyone is helpful to you?" Cora was eager to change her maid's thoughts and give herself a moment to regroup.

"Yes Miss, I mean, Yes Milady, they have been very kind" Besse nodded her head and gathered the last of the things she needed from the room.

"Oh goodness that sounds terribly strange doesn't it?" Cora could not get used to being a titled woman, she supposed it might take some time to come to terms with, definitely longer than the 8 or 9 hours since her wedding that day.

"I think it sounds very fitting Mis … Milady. A fine Countess you shall be too" Besse was standing to the side waiting to be told she was of no further use this evening. She knew the other staff would snicker when she came downstairs, they would ask questions and try to get information out of her. She feared tomorrow it would be worse, after the fact and all. It made her nervous and she tried to think of ways to avoid it or put off their questions without being rude.

"Well I am not a Countess yet, thank goodness, and I hope there will be plenty of time before that day should arrive. But thank you anyway, and while I am thinking of it I did want to thank you for agreeing to stay on for my honeymoon." Cora swiveled around in her chair and looked at her maid standing across the room. She knew Besse had not wanted to stay in England forever, she had family in the States, younger siblings and Cora suspected a beau if some sort as she was a fetching girl. But her father had paid Besse a most substantial sum to accompany Cora as her maid for her honeymoon to France and the girl had agreed to stay for it. She would leave once they returned through London on their way back, sending the last of Cora's ties to the States back with her. She was not an extraordinary maid by any means, just a regular young thing who worked well and was polite. But Cora had been so nervous about everything that her mother had suggested sending the maid instead of a new one to keep things as normal and uncomplicated for Cora as possible. Once again her mother had been right, Cora was thrilled it would be her maid helping her prepare each evening of her honeymoon and not a stranger.

"I am happy to Milady, glad to be of service" Besse smiled and bobbed her head in Cora's direction, recognizing there was nothing left to do Cora dismissed her and at the sound of the door closing behind her she stood and walked to the full length mirror.

She had a white nightdress on made of a sheer fabric Cora could not name. She had argued with her mother about the choice of material and flushed red when Martha had told her to trust her when she said her husband would be pleased of the choice. Cora had been turning pink in the cheeks all day long, she was sure she may have actually changed to that particular color permanently.

The service itself had been lovely, shorter than she would have thought but very nice. She had felt butterflies when the door to the church had opened and she saw Robert turn his head to look at her. He had smiled and it had caused her heart to almost jump right out of her chest. She had turned pink after the kiss when they turned to walk back down the aisle as husband and wife. She felt all eyes on her could read her thoughts. Then there had been the ride through the village in the decorated carriage, villagers cheering and waving small flags. She and Robert had made a bit of a game of seeing who could get the most villagers to smile at them. Robert assured her she had been the winner, but Cora knew they were all still unsure about the American bride. She was also sure that every man out there was winking with a wide grin at Robert and it had made her blush. Then there had been the wedding breakfast which was guest after guest congratulating them, raising toasts, talking of their future children … all Cora could think of at these times was that everyone in that room knew exactly what she and Robert would be doing later that evening. Even the footmen walking about in their liveries and serving trays of champagne seemed to smile a knowing smile at she and Robert and it had made her feel rather awkward. She was sure it was all just in her head, but the fact remained that they were husband and wife now, all things were permissible and everyone knew it. Thinking on that caused her cheeks to grow warm once more and she reached a hand up to touch her own cheek.

Robert was very aware of the amount of time his wife had been gone. He had waited 10 minutes after she had gone up for bed before he had said his goodnights to his remaining family. He had not looked in Patrick's direction when he did, he did not need his cousins obvious smirk and unsubtle wink to be in his mind just now. He had rung for his valet the instant he reached his room and the man had arrived in record time. He had been undressed and redressed into pajamas, although that seemed almost pointless but he supposed he shouldn't scare his poor wife on their first night together. He had dismissed his valet without delay and was now waiting the last 3 minutes to tick by on his clock in order to wait the full 3o minutes he had said he would. Why, he was not sure exactly, but he had decided 30 minutes was a reasonable amount of time and had decided to stick to it. He had heard the door close and her maid leave 2 minutes ago and he had had to stop himself from breaking through the door that instant.

She had been radiant today. Her dress was beautiful and fir her perfectly. If he had not been mistaken it was made up of several aspects that he liked from other dresses she had worn, the close fitted bodice, the draping gathering at her waist, the way it flowed around her legs. He had told her all day long what a vision she was, how divine she looked, and when he dared how much he anticipated tonight. This had caused that beautiful shade of pink to rise in her cheeks and for his own sanity he had not said it again for fear he may just drag her by the hand up the stairs and to hell with the guests. He had thought about tonight for weeks. Not just in the way he had started dreaming about at night when he woke up sweaty and breathing heavily and turned on. But more so his thoughts had been about her. He knew she would be nervous, hell he was nervous so she must be terrified. He knew it would be different for her, he would probably hurt her no matter how he would try not to, but it would take time for her to get used to. He wanted her to feel safe, and feel secure and feel as though she could trust him in this. He knew he had let her down in love, the least he could do was not let her down in lust. So it had been that Robert Crawley had located and read a book detailing the pleasure of a woman. It had been embarrassing to purchase the thing in Ripon, he could have sent someone for it but then another person would have known and that was awful beyond words. Then he had smuggled it into the house, sure that his mother would know it was there the moment he walked across the front steps. He had spent several evenings reading and looking at the pictures which had proved to be very educational, but had only eventually served to turn him on all the more. Now he felt as though he had spent the last week in a constant state of arousal and he was sat in his room waiting the last bloody 3 minutes he had imposed on himself.

Cora did not know how long she would have to wait for Robert, for her husband to come to her. She knew he was going to, he had mentioned today how excited he was for this evening, and had she not been busy turning the color of a beetroot at the time she would have replied to him that she was as well. She didn't know where to be when he came in? Seated on the bed? Lying in the bed? Standing next to the bed? Away from the bed? She tried a few options and then sat back at her vanity to brush her hair once more as she considered what the night would hold. Her mother had told her it would hurt, not always, but just this once it would at least be uncomfortable for a time. She had tried to tell her more but Cora told her to please not say any more. She couldn't hear that, not from her mother.

Finishing with her brush Cora picked up some lotion rubbing some on her hands, the light scent of lavender wafted into the air and she smiled. It was then that she heard a light tap on the connecting door and then it opened revealing a pajama clad Robert. Cora stopped rubbing in her lotion and sat still, her eyes on his. Surely they could hear her heart pounding all the way downstairs it seems so loud. Her stomach flipped and felt warm inside.

Robert found Cora sitting at her vanity rubbing the most pleasingly scented lotion on her hands. Her hair was shiny and freshly brushed hanging down in long dark tresses past her shoulders and across her back, small strands having fallen out and coming to rest down the front laying across her breast. He could nearly see through her nightgown, the white fabric sheer and soft. He swallowed hard and could barely manage to close the door behind him. She was so incredibly beautiful he felt he could scarcely breathe. He swallowed hard once more and locked his gaze with hers, she offered him a shy smile and spoke to him, but he could not take in her words. He should probably respond, but what had she said?

"Good evening Robert" Cora tried for a second time, her husband's eyes had locked on her, that is once they had looked up and down the length of her sheer gown. She had noticed the way he had swallowed and how he appeared to be standing rather frozen to the spot, it made her love him even more for his sweetness and gentleness in this the final sealing of their marriage vows. His shyness gave her courage and she rose from her seat and walked toward him smiling softly, not removing her eyes from his. With each passing step her body grew warmer in anticipation of his touch. She knew she liked being touched by him, she knew she liked the way his kisses felt and she found herself eager for more of these the closer she got to him. Reaching his still frozen body she stopped a few inches away and leaned her head to one side before smiling much larger.

"I said, good evening Robert" she said through her amused expression. Robert swallowed once more and nodded letting his gaze drop momentarily to her breasts before returning them to her eyes. Cora bit her lower lip as if he had physically touched her there and let out a breath of her own.

"Do you see something you like Robert?" she asked in a little more than a whisper. He nodded once more and looked down at her body again, his eyes did not return to her eyes as he slowly caressed her body with his blue eyes. If his eyes could make her shiver she could only imagine what else he could do to her. Emboldened by his obvious desire Cora reached out one hand and touched the collar of his pajama shirt gently, letting it fall delicately down the line to where his buttons were and let her hand rest against his chest. She could feel his heart beating underneath her hand and it thrilled her.

"It's yours Robert. All yours" she could not bear the few inches of distance between them any longer and took the final step forward just as Robert reached his arm out and wrapped it around her waist pulling her to him. They stood for a moment, her hand against his chest feeling his heart, his arm wrapped around her waist holding her against him, their eyes locked. This time it was she who froze and he who spoke.

"Cora." It was said more like a breath than a word, "What you do to me" he leaned down and their lips crashed together in a passionate kiss. Their kisses before this one had started out slow and built up to more, but this one was different from all it's predecessors, it was its own breed altogether. This was the passion and heat and need of months of waiting and wanting combined into the formation of this one frenzied kiss. Robert's lips were eager and demanding and so incredibly soft. They opened and closed at all the right time and his tongue gently caressed the outside of Cora's lips as she joined him in his frenzied need. Robert had awakened something in Cora these last months, a need and a yearning she hadn't know she needed. Now she could finally bring it to pass and the thought made everything more intense and heated.

Cora parted her lips to him with the softest of moans taking Robert from turned on to aroused in seconds. The months of waiting were over, he had come to claim his wife as truly his and it felt so good. He let his arm around her waist let go and find her backside feeling the roundness and softness of it against his skin. It was everything he hoped feeling her through just this soft material and not all those layers of clothes, but he wanted more, he wanted to touch her skin, to taste the different parts of her. He wanted everything, and he willed himself to slow down and savor each moment.

Cora let Robert into her mouth and relished the feel of his tongue against hers. The feelings it created between her thighs was delicious and she wrapped her arm around his neck pulling him closer to her mouth to create greater sensations through her body. His hand left her waist and found her backside, the other moved to the hem of her dress and began to slide it slowly up across her thigh higher and higher. The feel of his fingertips on her skin made her almost loose her balance it was so exciting. She could not have spoken if she wanted to, the heat of his kiss, the feel of his hand and fingers was more than she could take. She knew this was just the beginning, and she wanted more. Tangling her fingers in his hair she held him close and then pulled her mouth away allowing him access to her neck, remembering how exquisite his lips had felt there. This time was better than the last and she let out a loud gasp of air at the touch of his lips and the feel of his tongue at the side of her neck. She tingled all over and was losing the ability to think. Last time his lips had been there she had known they would have to stop, this time she knew they could travel wherever they liked across her body and it made her unsteady once more.

Feeling her body sway beneath him several times Robert knew it was time to move to the bed. He was loving every heated second of their kissing and fondling, but he wanted to really have the chance to explore his wife, and he couldn't have her topple to the floor. Lifting his head from her neck and releasing his hands from her body for a moment he heard her disappointed sigh, she was enjoying this as much as he was and it made him even harder. He leaned down and slipped one hand around her hip and another under her buttocks and lifter her into his arms and carried her to the bed. She wrapped her arms around his neck and placed her lips against his neck as he walked . She felt so good. Lowering her to the bed he lay he stood back up and backed away, he noticed with pleasure that her hands and reached for him of their own accord and he undid his pajama shirt buttons faster. Tossing his shirt to the floor he heard Cora gasp and watched as she bit her lip in appreciation before he joined her on the bed.

The sight of his shirtless form was breathtaking and Cora had to bite down on her lip, hard. Everything had felt so good, so right, so incredibly tantalizing she could not wait to have his hands on her again. So she did not protest when he joined her back on the bed and placed both hands at the hem of her nightgown and began dragging it up her body.

"You won't be needing this" his voice was husky, all she could manage was a breathy nod as she wriggled her body to help him remove the unwanted garment. Somewhere in the depths of her mind she knew she should feel embarrassed, perhaps he would think her eagerness wanton, but the passion in her overided those thoughts and as Robert flung her nightgown to the floor she welcomed his lips to her neck with open arms. He started kissing her neck and then moved slowly down covering every part of her chest, her collarbones, her shoulders. She felt his one leg slip between hers and she could feel the evidence of his arousal pressing against her thigh, it felt hard and foreign, but somehow she liked it. She knew she had made his body react that way and it made her stomach flip once more. When his lips began to descend their trail of kisses and tongue tasting down further she began to tremble. He had brushed her breast with his hand once before and she had liked it, if he was going to taste them with his mouth as she hoped he might be then she thought she would be in danger or exploding. She ran her hands along his back and felt the muscles and grooves of his skin, squeezing the tops of his arms as she rounded his shoulders and moved back down his back. He felt so strong, so smooth, so right under her touch.

Robert was mesmerized by his wife's porcelain skin, the feeling of her fingertips running across his back, the feel of her sweet center nestled inches from leg. He could not hold off much longer, and when he finally reached the peak of one of her breasts with his mouth he devoured it with need and tasted it with his tongue. He felt her shiver beneath him and her hands leapt from his back to the back of his neck pushing his mouth closer to her body. She cried out and made breathless noises as he licked and caressed her breast and nipple with his tongue. He hoped she was ready for him, he could not wait for her much longer, the way she had begun to writhe beneath him and grasp his hair was all too much.

"Oh Robert" Cora could not control her body or the wordless noises escaping her mouth. This was sweet sweet torture and she was desperate for more. When she thought she couldn't feel more pleasure than that of his lips and tongue against her breasts she felt his hand slide down her stomach and softly begin to touch her most secret of places. She almost stopped breathing for a moment as her began to slowly rub delicate circles between the folds down there. She gasped and tilted her head back crying out in the most unladylike manner. The moans she heard coming from her mouth were shocking, but what was there to do? She was being driven mad by the touch of her husband and the feel of his lips.

"Cora" Robert breathed, finally unable to take any more. As if the feel of her wasn't enough to drive him to distraction, the taste of her, the way she responded to his touch, the shivers of her body and the moans of pleasure were enough to make him spill his seed before he could even enter her. He was so excited he could not be without her another moment longer. "I need you" it was almost a growl, sort of a breath, not really a word. But he did need her. He needed to feel her around him, it was out of his control.

Cora felt Robert move his body on top of hers and came back to hover his face above hers. He leaned down and kissed her passionately again as he wriggled between her legs and positioned himself above her. He stroked her dark curls with his hand as he laid it across her head and kissed her again and again with a heated need. Cora knew it was about to happen, she was excited, she was passionately awakened, yet all of a sudden she felt nervous, and then before she could think any more he was inside her and she gasped softly against his lips in pain and he moved his lips to her ear as he pushed deeper inside her.

"I'm sorry Cora, I'm sorry" he breathed against her ear stroking her hair with one hand. She felt so good around him he could almost not stand to move, and yet he couldn't stand not to, it was amazing, but he knew he had hurt her. He heard her gasp. He needed to know she was ok.

"Are you alright? Can I …"

"Yes, keep going" she said quickly, and he started to rock against her body. Cora reached up and held onto the back of Robert's head and neck and tried to concentrate on the feel of his lips and breathe against her ear and not the feel of him between her legs. It hadn't hurt as much as she had thought, but it wasn't overly pleasant either, she hoped it would get better with time.

"C – O – R – A" Robert breathed again and again as he thrusted his body against hers. She was his wife now in every way and he felt incredible. He knew this was not good for her, he would help her to enjoy it as they practiced, but for now he felt the way she was beneath him and the feel of her center against his hard member had him to the brink sooner than he would have liked. Letting out a loud moan of pleasure Robert's body shuddered above his wife's as he finished and spilled inside her.

Clutching him tighter Cora could feel he was done and it felt warm and pleasant. She held on to him and closed her eyes for a moment. It was done, they were one now, married, joined. She was happy with the way the evening had gone, it was not as bad as she had been lead to believe. A little painful and unpleasant towards the end but that would not be forever she had been told. She was caught in her thoughts, enjoying the feeling of her husband lying across her body in her arms, thinking of the next time they joined together and smiling at the thought of it getting better with time. She was happy, her heart was full, and then Robert sat up and gave her a soft kiss on the cheek.

"That was lovely thank you Cora." Robert stood up and found his pajama top. Putting it on he smiled at her, then leaning down to kiss her once more he said "I will see you in the morning then" and he left her room.

Cora lay on the bed naked, alone and in shock. She had heard of English ways of course, but she had not thought that she and Robert would sleep apart. Not after what they had just done. Slowly Cora found the sheets and pulled them up to her chin. She felt lonely, cold, used. How could think the night had gone so well only a few minutes ago, when now she sat on the verge of tears. He had simply left. She did not know what to do, she was devastated by the formality of it all. Without even pulling her nightdress back on Cora curled into a ball and fell asleep for the first time as Robert's wife, all alone.


	17. Miscommunications

Robert woke up and stretched like a lazy cat. He felt rested, he felt happy, he felt satisfied. Downton was safe, he was married to Cora, their wedding night had been successful … well mostly, and this morning dawned almost as perfect as the day before. He had been a married man for almost 24 hours and he felt renewed. Cora was magnificent, the most beautiful bride. Last night she had been the most magnificent wife and stirred him in ways he didn't think could happen. He thought perhaps he had hashed it up at the end a bit thought. He had rushed out of her room rather quickly, but he had not known what else to do after the fact, especially as he had hurt her in the process. She was so sweet and understanding and he knew she would not blame him, it was just the way it was for a woman and everyone knew that. But what was he going to do, lay naked with her while she was in pain? He didn't know if the pain subsided straight away or if it lingered and he didn't know how to ask her. He didn't really need to know, or honestly care to know the details surrounding the secret parts of womanhood. He had felt it was best to remove himself as quickly as possible so she could take care of whatever needed taking care of. He didn't want to cause her any more pain than he had, even though she had reassured him she was ok he had seen and felt the slight change in her when he had entered her. He smiled glad that the first night was behind them and they could concentrate on getting better at the task. He would not mind practicing with his beautiful wife at all. He could practice with her right now in fact if he thought she would want to, but he was still not sure how she would be feeling after the events of last night. Would she still be in pain? He hoped not. He had planned a picnic for the two of them out in one of the further parts of the estate. It was set by a small, yet rather pretty pond, and there were ducks – which reminded him of their walks in the park in their courtship. He had taken great pains to coordinate the entire affair and had the cook arranged to cook all of Cora's most favorite tea cakes and the lavender bread she liked so well. Day 1 of married life was going to be a wonderful day indeed.

Cora had woken in the early hours of the morning and not been able to go back to sleep. She had replayed her husband's abrupt and unromantic exit from her room last night over and over in her mind and had come to the conclusion that she needed to speak to someone to clear the cobwebs threatening to cloud her mind. She could only think of 1 person who she could do that with, and she was going to be catching the evening train to London tonight, so she would have to call on her for luncheon. Robert wouldn't mind, Abigail was leaving and there was no other time for her to see her friend before she returned for what remained of the season. Then she and Robert would be in France a few days after that, so by the time they would return Abigail would be home in the States and she and Cora reduced to communication via mail. She was sure Robert probably had things to do today anyway, the wedding having taken up so much of his time of late and with their honeymoon days away she was sure it would be acceptable. Besides, she didn't know that he would even want to spend time with her today. Her mind had wondered off into dark paths where she thought Robert's attentions would cease once he got what he wanted from her both physically and financially. She didn't think that would be the case in reality, but her mind took her there as she thought about things and with last evening as a marker for things to come then she feared the worst. Ringing the bell for Besse Cora decided it was best to get the day started with and face her future.

Strolling arm in arm with Abigail after luncheon Cora let out a sad sigh.

"I just don't understand Abigail, I really do not" Cora has explained the situation to her friend, leaving out many sordid details so as to not completely scandalize her. They had shared their last luncheon together at the Dower House with the Levinson's and Mrs. Wentworth, Robert had declined to join her making his excuses quickly and with a short bow. She had thought he looked a little angry at her, but she had made it clear as soon as she had seen him that morning that she would be busy for a good part of the day and he needn't bother with her. She thought he would be pleased, but his face had seemed to darken at her words which caused to irritate her a little. He was obviously taking his role as husbands most seriously and she thought for a moment he might tell her she could not go. Much like her mother Cora had not often been told no before, and the thought that Robert might start out that way at the beginning of their marriage had begun to make cause her blood to boil. She had considered responding to him in ways she had seen her mother do in the past, with a quick wave of her hand and a clipped voice indicating she was going to get her way. But in the end she had decided that that was not the way she wanted to start her marriage, and she was not her mother and did not plan to ever be, so she had laid a hand gently in his arm and simply said, "Please Robert, will not see her again after today." He had bowed his assent and backed out the door quickly. Cora had the uneasy feeling she would have to get used to being left by her husband, and it made her feel sick.

"I am sure it is nothing Cora, although I have no experience from which to give you advice on this matter" Abigail said as they walked together. "Maybe he was overcome with emotion and wanted to leave before you saw him cry", at this both ladies giggled and Cora gently swatted Abigail's hand.

"Oh I am sure that was most definitely not the case." Cora said, "But I do hope you are right that it is nothing, I don't think I could live that way every night" they had reached the bench and sat down together.

"Cora, you and I have always known the English live a little differently than we do, perhaps if you explain to him how important …" Cora cut her off.

"No I can't. I don't want to start my marriage out making demands of my husband and trying to change him. I won't be that awful nagging wife who bothers her husband endlessly. I think it just comes back to the fact that he does no love me." Cora said sadly.

"But you knew that yesterday" Abigail said softly. She was not wrong. Cora thought for a minute before replying.

"I know I did. I guess I just believe that if he did love me he would have stayed, or at least stayed longer than he did. It was yet another reminder that he doesn't feel as I do and even though I already know it, it still hurts." Cora looked far away for a moment before shaking her head as if to clear her mind, "But that is enough of that. I am being silly aren't I? Everything was fine, better than fine, lovely, more than I could have hoped for" Cora blushed at the memory, "My feelings getting hurt in the last 5 minutes of a wonderful day and night does not make the day any less wonderful now does it." As if to convince herself Cora nodded. "Now, let us go and finish overseeing your packing dearest Abigail, you wouldn't want to return to London unprepared now would you".

Robert was in a grumpy mood most of the day after seeing Cora, he would not have thought that when he woke this morning and had had the most wonderfully romantic afternoon planned for them down by the little pond. Glancing at the clock in the library he sighed and thought of what he and Cora might have been doing at this very moment had she not found the first excuse to escape him. Right about now he would be feeding her blackberries and blueberries with whipped cream, maybe she would have gotten some cream stuck on the corner of her lip and he would have leaned in and brushed it away with his thumb. She would have smiled at him, maybe even blushed at his touch. A little bit after they would have strolled hand in hand around the entirety of the pond, ducks and ducklings alike quaking away after them as they took turns to drop crumbs of the old bread he had been sure to order from the kitchen along their way. He would have taken her in his arms, kissed her soundly on the lips and if he was lucky he would have heard one of her soft satisfying groans of pleasure release from the back of her throat as he caressed her mouth with his. Yet, none of that was happening. Here is was, a married man of exactly 1 day sitting in the library of his father's estate while his wife preferred to spend her day with her friend. He didn't begrudge her having friends, of course not. But this was their time, their honeymoon period to be together as much as possible and she had taken the first chance she had to go running off with her friend. He had wondered if it had anything to do with last night, if he had hurt her more than he had thought he had and considered how he might ask her. He had studied the way she moved across the room this morning and watched from the window as she had walked to carriage, but she seemed to be moving unhindered and in no pain. He had pain though, and it was most assuredly hindering him. He was hurt that she had left at the first opportunity without more than a 'please Robert' and away she went. He didn't mind admitting it, she had hurt his feelings and he was feeling terribly sulky about it.

Cora returned from Abigail's and thought it would be nice to find Robert. She had thought about thinks the more they talked and packed Abigail for London and she had decided she had overreacted in her thoughts about last night. 5 minutes of sadness did not sully the entire evening, and perhaps he had been nervous. She should at least start out by giving him the benefit of the doubt, she thought maybe it had been disappointment on his face this morning instead of something else, perhaps she was reading it all wrong. The least she could do was give him a chance, and she did love being around him. So as soon as she arrived back at Downton she began the hunt for her husband, but he was not anywhere to be found. Unsure what else to do Cora called for the butler asking where her husband was. It was at precisely this time when Violet entered the room followed by Robert bringing a large smile to Cora's face. Her smile faded as soon as Violet opened her mouth to speak.

"Cora, I am not sure how they do things where you are from, but here in the sophisticated world one does not go running through the house like a banshee looking for one's husband, or dragging the servants in and interrogating them as to his location either" Cora was flabbergasted, not only had she not done either of those things, but the tone in Violet's voice was almost violent and it stung as though she had been slapped. "If you are to be a Countess one day, which we can only pray will be a long ways off as you obviously have so much to learn, then may I suggest you find a way to start acting like one. And for heaven's sake keep yourself abreast of your husband's affairs that you may know where he might be at any given time of the day, that is why you are here." Cora stared in disbelief at the words her mother in law had spewed forth and braced herself for the onslaught that Robert would bring. He would not stand for his mother speaking to her in this manner, he would leap to her defense and Cora knew it would be a terrible fight. The more seconds that ticked by the more Cora realized with a painful dread that there would be no leaping or defending on her behalf today. She closed her eyes a moment to compose herself and as she was just about to speak Robert opened his mouth.

"Cora is not familiar with my habits yet mother" he said in an even tone. If Violet's words had felt like a slap, then Robert's felt like a knife. She would rather he said nothing at all than something as plain as that. She could feel tears on their way and would not let them spring forth in front of any Crawley's today.

"Thank you, yes. If you will excuse me, I am not feeling well at all" Cora said with a shaky voice, and turned on her heel and headed straight for her room where she closed the door behind her and crawled into bed tears streaming down her face.


	18. Making it work

Cora stayed in her room through dinner that night and all of the next day feigning illness. Robert had come to see her several times, all of which she had pretended to be asleep so she didn't have to talk to him. She didn't know what to say or where to start, so she hid away in the room and Besse bought her trays of food that largely went untouched. It was a good thing she and Besse had already packed almost everything for the honeymoon as Cora was in no mood to deal with that now, and in fact wondered how she and Robert would manage to get on for a month alone in France when they had not had a single day together as husband and wife. She supposed some of that responsibility fell on her as she was the one pretending to be sick and staying unapproachable in her room, but she had just not been able to get Robert's disregard for her out of her head. He had stood there and listened to the way his mother had spoken to her and allowed it to happen. Cora wondered what her father would say if she should ever be bold enough to tell him. She considered sending a letter to her parents about it all, but quickly dismissed that thought as childish and self absorbed. She would have to just face the music tomorrow when they began their honeymoon trip and pray for the best.

Robert had effectively spent the first 2 days of his marriage alone. How had this happened? He would never have thought Cora able to act so childishly as to pretend a sickness and stay in her room. If his feelings had been hurt the other day, then they were quite trampled on now. She had even pretended to be asleep when he had come to see her, it was like she had slapped him across the face. She had told him she loved him, and yet this is how she behaved days into their marriage. It gave him an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach and made him sadder than he would have thought possible. Now it was time to embark on their honeymoon together and he could not think of a single thing to say to her that did not begin with 'stop being childish'. He was well aware his mother's comments had wounded his wife and he had given his mother a firm piece of his mind about it after Cora had left. Perhaps he could have said more at the time, but he didn't want to begin the marriage getting in the middle of his mother and his wife's business, they would have to sort it out between themselves ad women did. But he had insisted his mother treat Cora with more courtesy and kindness from now on, she had rolled her eyes. Then when Cora remained in her room for the entire next day, well Mama had a field day with that. She was not making this easy on herself and Robert did not know how to tell her that. Maybe he had missed something, maybe he was not being a good husband … not that he had been given the chance to try, it had been 2 days and he'd seen her for only a handful of minutes. Robert let out a sigh and rang the bell, it was time to get to the train station and start his honeymoon with his beautiful new wife, and he was not really looking forward to it anymore.

They had made their journey to France in relative silence, Cora reading her book, Robert his newspaper and had spoken very little. When she knew he was preoccupied with his paper Cora would steal glances at her husband and try to figure out what had happened in so short a time to the man she had fallen in love with. The most horrifying thought that would creep into her mind was that he had been putting on a very convincing act and was not really who he had seemed to be at all. She supposed one could act very well with so much money on the line, but she shut her eyes and willed that thought away hoping and praying she was wrong. She must be wrong, he had been so tender with her on their wedding night, she had already realized those final moments were not his fault, she had already decided to move on from having him leave so abruptly … but she had not been given a chance. Rather, she had not given Robert the chance as she had sulked and moped in her room avoiding all Crawley's for an entire day. Stupid really, she thought, she could have spoken to Robert when he came, but all she could think when she heard his footsteps cross the room to her bed and heard him lean over her whispering her name as he brushed her hair from her eyes was 'you did not save me' and it had hurt, so she had pretended to sleep and ignored him. Perhaps now she was getting the same response from him? She could not escape the nagging thought that maybe this was her doing, but how to fix it she had no idea.

The journey to France had been horrid. No-one spoke much of anything except 'watch your step' and 'are you hungry?' … 4 weeks of this would drive him mad. He had not married Cora because he was head over heels in love with her, but he had very much enjoyed her company and the easy way which they passed the time together. Now the awful feeling that perhaps he had been mistaken kept finding its way through to his brain. He tried shaking his head to the side in the hopes that horrible thought would simply fall out, but of course it didn't. He spent the first 3 days in Paris in a fog of uncertainty and was sure he was acting rather brisk with Cora. They had dined out once and it had been dreadfully strained. They had walked along the Seine together twice with very stilted conversation. Finally Robert had decided that if this didn't change they would be going home early, and he decided to set about trying to change it. He spent most of the fourth day going over and over things she had said, he had said, when things had suddenly turned south. He seemed to think it happened after their wedding night and he grimace again at the thought he must have hurt her terribly that night. It was after a long day of thinking that Robert finally decided to act, and went down to the foyer of the hotel to do just that.

Cora had taken herself shopping on the fourth day of her honeymoon alone, Besse in tow. She could not handle yet another strained conversation with Robert, and thought if she had to cry herself to sleep every night he did not come to her room she might die of dehydration. Things had been better before they were married; things had been almost perfect then. But now, now it was as though they were strangers who couldn't think of anything to say and they were both frozen in fear. As she walked through the elaborate market and admired the trinkets she thought on the past few days. Maybe it had been unwise to leave her husband alone the day after their wedding? Maybe there were things he hadn't told her? Definitely it had been foolish to remain in her room for an entire day. Cora was new to marriage and she was not sure what to do from here. She knew she could not live her life this way though; she would crumple into a ball and die. Rather than allow that to happen Cora decided she would do something, anything to make things different, and so with purpose she had lacked for days she entered another store with a plan.

When Cora returned to the room Robert was nowhere to be found, but there was a note.

_Dearest Cora, _

_Please be ready for dinner by 5:30._

_Your Robert_

Cora had only an hour to be ready and to set her plan in motion, so she hurried into her room and got to work.

By the time 5:35 rolled around Robert was a little nervous. Maybe he should have spoken to her in person rather than the note, but he thought maybe he might give something away, or mess it up in person, and he had several details to attend to so he had run out and didn't want to miss her upon her return. It worked to his advantage that their room was in fact the largest suite available at this hotel. They each had a room on opposite side of a living area, so Cora had been quite unaware of what he was doing in his room and in the shared space while she was in her own room. But now he wondered if she had ignored the note, maybe things were worse than he thought, and he nervously adjusted his tie. As his hand came down from his neck the door to Cora's room opened and she took a step forward. He felt relief wash over him like a warm wave, and felt his mouth fall open slightly at the sight of his wife before him. She looked beautiful beyond words, a dress he had never seen her wear, light pink and sparkling so that it caught the light. He swallowed hard and smiled.

"Robert?" Cora asked looking at the display before her. "What is this?" she smiled at his face as he stood looking like a proud little boy at what he had done. The living area had been completely transformed from a living area into an n elaborate dining room. A small round table for two sat in the middle with places set in elegant ivory. Several large dishes were covered and sat to the side of the table on a cart; the smell informed her it was their dinner. The floor was littered with an array of different flower petals, and a single red rose lay across one plate. Cora felt air escape her and she held her hand to her chest for a moment as she took in the scene before her. For the first time since her had left her alone Cora felt her stomach flip in excitement.

Robert could see her reaction and it bolstered his confidence, she was obviously pleased with what he had done, the evening was finally beginning and it was starting off well. Robert extended his hand to Cora to escort her to her seat, when she placed her hand in his and looked into his eyes and smiled he felt that he could hold the moon. He could get them back on track; he could save Downton, his honeymoon and his marriage.

The evening had been more than lovely, more than she could have hoped it would be. Robert had arranged an intimate, beautiful, elaborate dinner in their suite and he had spared no expense. They had 2 bottles of the finest champagne, the best of Parisian cuisine, the most incredible dessert … and Robert. Robert had been the husband every girl would dream of. He had begun after they sat down with an apology; Cora had felt her throat get tight and told herself not to cry. He expressed his sorrow for not being more understanding. When Cora was able to speak she had apologized as well, sorry that she had acted as she had locked away in her room. Reaching across the table to hold both of her hands in his he had smiled and suggested they both forget the last few days and just move forward. Cora couldn't have thought of anything better herself and had nodded her agreement, unable to speak.

After dinner Cora remembered what she had done earlier and asked if he excuse her for a few moments. Robert had nodded, but she saw that he was a little sad that she was leaving him after their wonderful meal, but she knew he would be happy with the result.

Robert sat at the table playing with his spoon tipping it over and back again while he waited. The evening had been a complete success, Cora had apologized to him as well, he had been surprised and pleased that she had felt the same as he did, and following that they had enjoyed their evening together laughing and talking. Just before she had made her exit he had decided he was going to ask her to retire to her room and make up for the end of their first night, but she had quickly excused herself before he had had the chance, and now he waited. She said she had a surprise for him, but it was taking longer than he had thought it might. He was getting agitated waiting and he began to tap his leg under the table. His foot froze in place as he saw Cora's door open and she leaned her back against the doorframe with a shy smile. Robert knew his mouth had gaped open, he knew he was staring; he could faintly remember to breathe and was barely aware of the sound of her voice floating through the air.

"Robert? Would you care to join me?" Cora asked quietly, shyly. She had found the store quite by accident but it had been exactly what she was thinking of. She had not seen undergarments such as these before and it had been quite exciting to look through them and consider how Robert might like some of them. She had ordered others, but for her plans today she needed something that was ready to wear with only minor alterations. It had no sleeves, just straps that went across her shoulders and it hugged her body closer than anything she owned and flowed out at all the right places. If the cut wasn't brazen enough the color was, it was deep red, with see through lace cut outs throughout. She felt as though she was wearing nothing at all. Robert's face made her shift her feet nervously and she knew she had hit her mark. Her blood began to race.

Robert sat frozen in place staring at his wife. He had never seen such a nightdress, or undergarment, or whatever that was that slid across her body. He could hardly catch his breath for a moment and was aware she had spoken to him. He couldn't answer.

"Robert?" Cora asked again, her nerves were through the roof, this was so forward of her, she didn't really have a plan as she had hoped Robert would take over, but he sat staring at her breathing hard, so she took several steps across the room and closed the gap between them. Reaching her hand out to him she spoke his name once more, "Robert, would you care to join me?" she asked as she took his hand in hers. The touch of her hand bought him out of his state and he rose to his feet.

"Very much" he breathed.

They moved to Cora's bedroom and Cora slowly backed away to lie on the bed propping herself up on her shoulders, the garment she wore slipped between her legs revealing the tops of her thighs.

"Perhaps you should take off your jacket" she said calmly, Robert quickly complied before crawling his way up the bed and covering her body with his. He closed his eyes for a moment and breathed in her scent as she lay back and reached her arms up to his neck bringing his lips down to her lips. Cora felt as though she had been starving and was finally given food, she opened her mouth to his straight away and relished the taste of his tongue and the movements he made against hers. She ran her hands through his hair wildly, pulling him closer and closer to her, desperation taking over her in way she could not have known existed. She felt his body heavy against hers and it caused a stir in her stomach, a pleasure she couldn't deny, she parted her legs slightly and he slipped between them fully clothed causing them both to moan in delight.

"Take – off – your – clothes" she murmured between breaths and kisses as they continued to assault each others lips in a frenzied collection of kisses. She moved her hands down to his neck and began fumbling with his tie while they kissed, he lifted a hand to help her and between the two of them they managed to remove his tie and throw it to the floor. She started on his shirt buttons and he reached a hand down to his pants to begin the process of removing them. He did not complete the task as he felt Cora's hands run up his chest once she had freed the buttons and he couldn't think enough to take his pants off. She was running her fingers across his chest and pulling his shirt off his shoulders; he wriggled his arms and helped her free him. When they reached the cufflinks they both laughed as they had come to the point they would need to separate to complete Robert's disrobing, and he sat up to do so as quickly as he could. Cora lie watching her husband finish removing his clothes and breathed heavily, desperate for him to be naked, ready to feel what he had done to her before, hoping it would not hurt again. When he was ready he came back to her he smiled gently before returning to his previous position. They both lay still for a moment looking at each other before Cora moved her hands back up and touched his chest. She enjoyed the feel of his body under her hands, the firmness of his muscles, the texture of his chest hair against her fingertips, it made her shiver and she bit her lip. When she brushed her fingers across his nipples he shut his eyes and let out a breath of pleasure.

"Oh Cora" he breathed, and then he lay his lips down against her neck and lay a trail of his kisses there satisfied at her sighs. The longer he ministered to her there the more she moved beneath him in pleasure, spurring him on. He moved his hand to her side and ran it down her length and rested it upon her upper thigh. She sighed in pleasure as he slowly let his hand wander back up the inside of her thigh and skirt around her center.

Robert felt her shudder beneath him as he teased her with his hand. He continued to taste her neck and jaw line and enjoyed the way her hands roamed across his body, brushing his buttocks, her nails gently scratching him as she went. When he finally touched her center with his hand she gasped out loud and he bought his head up to see her face. She breathed deeply as he touched her there slowly, deliberately, stoking the fire that formed there and enjoying the look in her eyes as she felt for the first time the pleasure he could bring to her. She moved one hand to touch the side of his cheek as he gazed down at her and he leaned against it nuzzling her hand with his cheek. He sped up his movements with his hands in response to her sighs of pleasure, and when he saw her close her eyes and lean her head back further into her pillow he bought his lips back to her neck to add to her pleasure. She moved her hand to the back of his head and moaned louder as he bought her to pleasure with his hands. Writhing and panting beneath him he heard her cry out and he moved his body above her to take her completely, lifting his head to look at her face once more, with one swift motion he entered her and she opened her eyes. He stopped, fearing he hurt her again, but she smiled and pulled his face back to her lips and moved beneath him inviting him to continue as they kissed each other once again. The combination of their kisses and the feel of her around him drove him wild. He thought their wedding night had been good, but this, this was amazing. She was so slick around him and moved with him as he thrust into her. She responded to his touch eagerly and he had made her feel pleasure with his touch. He kept up his thrusts and moved in a rhythm that gave him intense pleasure.

"Robert" she breathed against his lips as he rocked against her again and again. "My gosh" she gasped as he pulled her legs up and repositioned them around his waist further, deepening his access to her. She gasped and groaned in pleasure as he rocked and rocked against her. When he finally could not take it any longer he cried out her name and thrusted once more falling against her body exhausted and satisfied.

Robert lay on top of her with his head against her chest and her arms around him. She traced tiny circled along his back and gathered her breath. It had been magical, wonderful, the way he had touched her and made her feel – she could stay there forever with him that way. When he started to stir and then got up and sat against the bed she felt cold and lonely all of a sudden. She did not want him to leave her, not now and she racked her brain for a coherent thought. As he stood to gather his things she sat up and watched him.

"Stay with me" she said softly before she could stop herself. He looked up from gathering his pants, his face forming the question for him. "I mean, could you … sleep in here … with me?" she asked looking down, suddenly feeling childish. Cora saw him move out of the corner of her eye around to the side of the bed where she was sitting and felt his hand against her cheek, gently raising her head to meet his gaze.

"I would love to" he said, leaning in to kiss her softly against the lips.


	19. Coming Home

The newlyweds arrived home to Downton on a drizzly Thursday afternoon a little weary from their travels but happy none the less. Cora had seen Robert's face light up as they had rounded the corner in the carriage and had their first view of Downton and she had squeezed his hand tighter. She could not be sad that her fortune would be spent keeping this estate alive. It was such an important part of who Robert was and she loved him so dearly she was glad her money had made him so happy. She found herself of two minds about returning to Downton. On the one hand she was eager to begin their life together, to start forming habits and rituals as a couple, to in time have their children and make memories with each other. On the other hand she knew things would be different at Downton than on their honeymoon, not just because they would have to get on with the business of living and not honeymooning … but also because her mother in law would be there, and they had yet to have a conversation where Cora did not feel belittled and slighted. When Robert looked down at her and laid a kiss on her forehead Cora relaxed a little more, with Robert as her husband she would be fine.

Robert had not realized how happy he would be to return home. He had enjoyed being alone with Cora for their honeymoon, that is after those first few days had passed. They had made love throughout the nights and slept late in each other's arms. They had made love in the morning as the sun rose, and then again in the afternoons as they rushed in from sight seeing with senses heightened after a day spent flirting and teasing each other. He had very nearly taken her in the carriage on the way back from dinner not 3 nights ago, had it not been for her layers of skirts under her dress he would have done so, but he had bought her pleasure with his hands anyway which had left her face flushed and breathing fast as they had walked through the foyer and to their suite. Robert smiled at the memory of her swatting his arm once they were returned to their room as punishment for making her so disheveled and heated. He had grabbed her arm and kissed it at the wrist, slowly moving his way up its length - she had not been angry after that. He would surely miss those moments of freedom with his wife, but he was ready to start his life with her in earnest, settle into their life at Downton, establish a routine. He was not a man who relished change but rather found beauty in the routines of daily life. He was ready to so with his new wife.

His parents had been please to see them, and after a fairly enjoyable dinner together they had retired to the sitting room. Cora and Violet had waited in near silence, Violet choosing a book in favor of conversation with her daughter in law as they had waited for their husbands to come through. After 10 minutes Cora could not take the silence and decided she would retire, she was tired anyway and so she made her excuses to Violet and slipped out of the room. She knew Robert would figure out she had gone to bed, and she knew he would be there to warm her up soon. She had come to love their nights together, relished his touch. The thought of it made her rush up the stairs a little quicker, and once in her room she rang the bell for her maid.

Cora's new maid had arrived at Downton a few days before they had returned home and Robert was not familiar with the woman. He knew her name was Willis and had felt a bit nervous asking to speak with her after dinner. He had informed her she needn't attend his wife that evening, even if she called for her. Robert new his wife's American maid would have not listened to him, but would have needed to confirm this with Cora first, but an English maid would do as he asked. So it was with no fear of being caught that he carefully opened his wife's door from the hallway entrance and walked in slowly.

Cora was seated in front of the vanity and he saw the look of surprise in her eyes when she looked in the mirror and saw him standing there. She turned around to face him.

"Robert, you are early darling, Willis has not come to prepare me for bed yet" she smiled up at him and he returned it with a gleam in his eye.

"She's not coming - but I am here to serve you My Lady" he gave her a bow and she looked at him in slight confusion until she realized his intent. A soft simmer of butterflies began in her stomach and she stretched out her left leg toward him deciding to play along.

"Very well then" she said softly, "You may start by removing my stockings."

Cora shivered as she Robert knelt on one knee in front of her and after placing her foot on his knee ran his fingers up and under her skirts and found the top of her stockings in the middle of her thigh. She thought perhaps he would forget about undressing her and just do as he had in the carriage in Paris, but he slowly and gently pulled the top of her stocking down her leg and off her foot, repeating the process with her other foot. There was something so sensual and arousing about the way he looked up at her, the way he touched her delicately, the way he stared into her eyes and held her gaze. She wanted to cry, but her deepening arousal took over and banished the tears in favor of a wicked grin.

For the next 20 minutes Robert's hands served Cora's body, tenderly removing each piece of clothing that kept her bound. He was gentle like a lamb, and Cora hid a smirk as he laid each piece of clothing down carefully do as to not ruin it in anyway. When he reached her corset he turned her around and she held onto the bed post. She felt his arms reach her shoulders and rub across the top of them before sliding down her back and begin unlacing. She was so turned on by his touch she was shivering slightly, and she knew if he entered her she would be ready for him. His hands had touched each part of her body as he had carefully undressed her. It was the most spectacular way to heighten her longing and she felt her blood racing to her most tender areas creating a pleasant throbbing need.

Robert had thought himself incredibly restrained as he had undressed his wife. He had taken care not to touch too much, but just enough and he could see that his efforts were working with Cora. She trembled as she held on to the bed post and he pulled on the laces of her corset. He had seen in her eyes that she was turned on, heard the way her breathing had become quicker, her pulse more rapid, her face more flushed. He himself had felt the same way since she had held her leg out for him and he had pulled down her stocking. He was ready to have her, and with her bent over against the bedpost this way he could almost not wait any more. Pulling hard on the last of the laces he freed her body and pulled the corset down over her hips and past her buttocks to the floor. After she stepped out of it she move to turn around, but he stopped her placing his hands on top of hers and guiding them back to the bedpost. Once she was holding on he ran his hands down the length of her arms, across her bare shoulders, down her back and over her round buttocks. He guided her legs apart further with his hands and then gently reached between and began to stroke her warmth depth. He heard her sigh and watched as her head dropped to rest on her arms still holding the bedpost. He came up behind her and dropped his lips to the back of her neck while reaching up with his free hand slide it back along her arm, resting it above hers. Her neck pushed against his lips begging for more and he trailed his kisses along the side of her neck, down her shoulder blades, and back up to the other side. Coupled with his ministrations between her thick folds she was left moaning in pleasure, gasping for air. When she breathlessly said his name hi wiped her body around and pulled his arms around her middle crushing her to him, meeting in a spine tingling kiss. She lifted one leg up and wrapped it around his waist, as they lay an onslaught of passionate kisses against each other's lips.

Cora felt her body was on fire. He had touched her everywhere, kissed the back of her neck driving her wild. She felt as though she would come undone if he wasn't inside her soon. She felt out of control, and frantic for him. She undid his tie and ripped at his buttons hearing a popping sound as several flung away from his shirt. She broke their kiss in order to taste the sweet and masculine flavor of his neck and chest. She heard him grown and could feel his arousal through his pants. She reached her hands around his neck and held on tight as she kissed his chest and dragged her tongue down to his erect nipples. He groaned loudly and pulled her closer as her tongue flicked across his nipples and she sucked at them hungry for his taste in her mouth. She had lost all control when it came to him. He made her feel so safe, so desired, so ready for anything that she gave herself to him willingly and openly. She had been worried that things would be different at Downton, but their wanton need of each other proved her wrong. Feeling Robert grab her other leg and lift it up she squealed in delight and returned her lips to his as he walked them across the room to the wall.

Robert carried Cora, her legs around his waist and his arms around hers over to the nearest wall. He was more aroused than ever, but for his pants he would be inside her already. Letting go of one hand he fiddled with his pants not wanting to part his lips from hers or break away. He felt her hands come to his and help as together they unclasped his pants and he wriggled out of them. Once free he kissed her more soundly and eased himself into her as she let out a throaty sigh of pleasure against his mouth. He had excellent access to her in this position and thrust against her again and again as their bodies thudded against the wall. Cora parted from his lips and held onto his shoulders tighter, gasping and sighing in to his ear. Robert let go of her waist with one hand using it to steady them against the wall. He was going to be spent in a few moments, and he thrust harder and with greater force hoping to have her reach her own pleasurable end.

"Oh – my – stars" Cora breathed as he thrust and rocked her into the abyss of pleasure. She felt him come to a stop soon after and his body shook against her and she knew he too was spent. Panting and sweaty he carried her to the bed where they both lay down, naked, exhausted and satisfied.

"Wow" Cora exclaimed, Robert chuckled in response and patted her hand. After several moments he stood up and began to gather his clothes, Cora sat up in the bed and a slow realization of what was taking place came upon her.

"What are you doing?" Cora asked the question, surprised she even had to. Was he really leaving? After sleeping with each other for a month he was going to take back up the separate room policy now they had returned to Downton.

"I'm going to my room" Robert said the words slowly, thinking perhaps that if he answered carefully enough he could avoid a disagreement. Sleeping with each other was fine during their honeymoon, but here in Downton …. His mother would find out and it would be another thing to hold against Cora and a fight he did not want to have.

Cora felt her shoulders sag and pulled the sheet up around her further, after the bliss of their honeymoon Cora had assumed things would continue in the same vein at home. The blow was worse than when he left her the first time. The first time he had not known any better, he had not slept with her at night and woken up in each other's arms. He hadn't laid gentle kisses across her naked shoulders and neck to wake her up in the morning; they hadn't made love under the gaze of the earliest morning light. Now he was turning his back on all of that and leaving her there alone once again. She wished he had never stayed with her in the first place if he was going to leave her now. It would have been easier to digest the medicine had she never known what the cure felt like. Her disappointment quickly turned to anger as she watched him wrapping himself in his dressing gown and heard him try to justify himself.

"It's just, people like us don't do that Cora and mother …"

"Just go!" she snapped, interrupting him more harshly than she had intended. She had not spoken to him this way since being his wife, but her blood was beginning to boil and she couldn't just let him think this was ok with her. The fact he had cited his mother's disapproval just added fuel to her fire.

"Cora I …" he reached out a hand trying to explain, but Cora was past it. She didn't want him to stay now, not when he had put thoughts of his mother above her.

"I said Leave!" Cora yelled in his direction before dropping the sheet and getting out of bed completely naked and stomping to the bathroom where she slammed the door behind her.

Robert stood in Cora's room and looked at the door she had slammed behind her. He didn't know what to do in this situation; things had been going so well and now this. He thought she was overreacting, but he still didn't want her mad at him. He would wake up and find her dark hair laid across his chest, or covering his forearm, he could bring his lips to the back of her neck and wake her up with kisses and touches. He liked it, but it was not what was done. His mother would give him grief for it and take it out on Cora. Deciding he had to try something he walked to the closed door and knocked gently.

"Cora, I can stay tonight if you like?" he could stay this one night and figure it out in the morning if it would just make Cora happy. She did not answer, so he tried again. "Cora? I can stay tonight darling, just come out, please." Her response through the door made his blood run cold. She sounded cold and angry.

"Leave Robert! I don't want to sleep with you anymore!"

Robert took a step back as if the door had knocked him down, and with a heavy feeling plaguing his heart he walked sadly to his own room.


	20. A Fighting Chance

Robert waited in the library for Cora to emerge for the day. She had breakfast in bed, as was the custom for married women of course, but he thought by now she would have come down for the day and hoped against hope that she would not hide in her room as she had done after their wedding. He paced nervously catching the eye of his mother who had been down for at least 30 minutes.

"Perhaps it is an American custom to sleep all day" Violet said in a detrimental tone. Robert was about to interject when Cora's voice came out smooth as honey.

"Oh I think you will find we sleep in very much the same patterns as the English do Lady Violet" Cora had entered the library with her writing basket in hand.

"Imagine that" Violet said sarcastically and rolled her eyes as she left the room. Cora moved across to the desk and sat down without looking in her husband's direction. He knew this was not about to blow over, it had kept him up throughout the night and he had thought perhaps if he tried to take her out for a walk, maybe a redo of the picnic he had planned after their wedding. Maybe that would help her feel settled and not mind so much the sleeping arrangements.

"Good morning Cora" he offered lightly as he walked up behind her placing his hands on her shoulders and leaning in to kiss her on the cheek. She moved her head to the side indicating she did not want him to do so and he lifted his hands from her shoulders slowly. "I simply wanted to kiss you good morning Cora, nothing more" he said gently, it felt like such a blow whenever she rejected him.

"Had you slept in my bed last night you would have already been able to do that" she said without emotion as she unpacked her letter paper and writing equipment. He sighed and tried again.

"Cora, please. It's not me, it's the way things are done here, and – you know how it is, it's not something I want it's just a tradition, it's proper Cora and …" she did not turn her head or raise her voice when she interrupted him, it frightened more than her yelling at him last night.

"I think that is what makes it worse Robert" she had begun to date her first letter and spoke as if this was something mundane, not requiring her fill attention, it irked him. "That it is your duty to a tradition you do not even like that keeps you from doing something that you know is important to me" she addressed her letter, _Mr. Isidore Levinson_ and began on the address.

"Perhaps if we could talk about it without you being distracted it mi …"

"There is nothing further to discuss on the matter Robert. Now you must excuse me, I have letters to write" and with that she began her letter.

_Dearest Papa, _

_I am writing to you from my new home at Downton having returned from a blissful honeymoon just yesterday. Paris was wonderful, the sights magnificent … although you were right about the Seine, too many boats and people to be serene. Robert and I found ourselves visiting sights and walking the streets on a daily basis and I think it is somewhere I should like to return to someday. _

_Downton is still very new to me, although I find myself excited at the prospect of finding out more about the place. I am sure there are stories behind these walls, a very great deal of history here and so many lives were lived right where I sit now. _

_I know you asked me to promise to keep you updated on how things are with Robert and I know why. I told you there was nothing to fear Papa, he is the best kind of man and I am only sorry you didn't get the chance to get to know him better while you were still here. Perhaps we can come visit you and mother before too long and you will know him more then. As you requested, yes I am happy, yes he is treating me well, yes I want to be here. You needn't worry papa, all is well with me. My only problem is missing you so terribly much. _

_Give my love and warmest embrace to mother and Harold as well. _

_Love, _

_Cora Crawley_

Cora knew Robert was still there reading over her shoulder but it did not bother her at all. It was good for him to be reminded his powerful and rich father in law had an eye on him at all times, it almost made Cora smile. Just as she began to address another letter Robert spoke.

"Do you mean what you wrote?" Robert was surprised that Cora had not mentioned their latest quarrel or the fact his mother had been frightfully rude to her at every turn. "It's just, I thought with the current situation you may have something else to tell him" Robert looked down suddenly embarrassed. It was know that Cora turned around and looked at him for a moment.

"Robert" she said almost frustrated, "I am mad at you, that doesn't mean I don't love you" deciding she needed some air and the chance to be away from her hovering husband Cora stood, "I am going for a walk, excuse me" and she hurried way from him.

It was 2 more days of Robert trying to talk to Cora and Cora trying to ignore him. She had almost moved past mad and into disappointed when she heard Robert and his mother talking one afternoon. Violet informed Robert that she knew he had not been to Cora's room for several days and that they had a duty to produce an heir and had better get on with it. Robert was all apology and explanation and it made Cora fume. It was none of her business what Robert and Cora did as a married couple, and that Robert was letting her intrude was all too much. She walked in and took a seat opposite Violet just as Robert excuse himself to see his father on estate business leaving Violet and Cora alone for tea together.

Cora began with small comments about the weather, how mild it seemed compared to France. Violet simply said France was too hot, too ostentatious, too … French for her liking and sipped her tea while studying Cora intently. After several minutes of Violet's studied gaze upon her face Cora asked,

"Is anything the matter?"

"I wonder Cora, do you understand your role here?" Violet asked, setting down her tea. Cora braced herself, sure this would not end well.

"My role? Yes I believe so" she nodded and sipped her tea, waiting.

"Because you know Cora, you are the heiress who married the Earl's son. One day you will be a Countess and do you know what a Countess needs more than anything else?" Violet looked intently at Cora with her hardened stare.

Shaking her head Cora complied with the ruled if this little game, "No Lady Violet I am sure I do not know. What is it that a Countess needs?"

"A son." Violet smirked as Cora's face registered her surprise and then she pressed on, "It is your duty to produce an heir for your husband so he may continue the family name. I should not have to remind you that it is not your place to deny your husband Cora. In matters of marital relations you need to submit to him regardless of you feelings on the subject or how unpleasant you may find it. He is the head of your home and in regards to things physical he takes the lead. Make a list in your head if you must, or count sheep until he is done, but you must submit Cora, it is part of being a good wife." Violet showed no sign of embarrassment or unease as she handed out her thoughts on Cora's marriage bed; she spoke as if it was as regular a matter as what to serve for luncheon and turned her face into a pursed frown. Cora could not stand it any longer, she was her mother's daughter after all and not one to sit idly by and be pushed around.

"I hesitate to remind you that he may be your son, but he is now my husband and what happens between he and I remains between he and I" Violet 's head snapped back to look at Cora and she opened her mouth to speak but Cora continued over top of her, "I would appreciate it if you kept your opinions and advice on this matter to yourself" and before Violet could answer Cora walked towards the door, she knew she shouldn't add the last part, she knew it would make it worse, but she did it anyway, Violet expected the worst from her so what did it matter, "I do not find it unpleasant in the least, and as son as Robert removes his head from his backside he is welcome in my bed anytime", there would be hell to pay later, Violet was not going to take that from Cora without a single word in response, but for now Cora smiled as she thought of her own mother and how she proud she would be for standing up to Violet on her own terms.

Cora heard the sound of Robert's footsteps approach her door and braced herself. His mother had told him, he was come to scold her and she knew she deserved a little scolding. She shouldn't have added the last part, but that woman set her teeth on edge and she found it hard not to bite. When Robert entered the room his eyes were much darker than the usual light blue, his shoulders were squarer and he looked mad. Cora decided she would hold her ground and stood in place next to her bed.

"You did not really say what mother says you did to my mother over tea this afternoon did you?" Robert spoke as calmly as he could muster, but he was mad at the foolishness of his wife's behavior, she would never win his mother over with stunts like that.

"It depends what she thinks I said. If she said I told her to butt out of our bedroom affairs and that I like sleeping with my husband then yes, that is what I said, and I would say it again too" Cora placed her hands on her hips to show her stance was firm.

"Cora, that was incredibly foolish of you" Robert raised his voice at her, "Mother is only saying what she thinks need be said, you need to learn to pick your battles with her, honestly" he ran a hand through his hair in frustration. His mother had been livid at the way Cora had spoken to her. She had called her every insult she could think of and Robert had had no ability to defend his wife as she had in deed done the things his mother accused her of.

"Foolish?! I am sorry Robert if defending our right to privacy is foolish, perhaps if someone else spoke up from time to time I would not have to do so" Cora was getting mad at Robert. He was too busy doing as his mother commanded to see what Cora was doing.

"I am defending you to mother ever chance I get and it is tiring me out. You need to figure out a way to get along with her without causing such problems" he threw his arm across the air for affect.

"Causing problems? Me? She is the one making snide comments and being rude. I would have expected my husband to defend me but he just does whatever his mother says, its disgusting Robert." Cora knew it was not just a fight about what she had said to Violet, but the sleeping arrangements as well.

"I do defend you. I have talked at length to mother about the way she treats you and I am trying to help, but then you do something like this and I feel like all my good work has been good for nothing."

"What good work? She get's worse every day, if this is a result of you helping me then please Robert, just don't bother." Cora let sarcasm drip through her voice as she delivered her words to Robert who had begun to pace. At her words he stopped in his tracks and turned to face her, his face red and mad.

"You need to learn the way things are done here Cora. You will be a Countess one day, you need to know how we do things whether you like them or not." Robert regretted his choice of words once they were out, but he was so frustrated, so irritated at both his mother and Cora that he had not thought them through.

"I left everything I ever knew to come here and be your wife, not to be treated like some kind of untrained leper that your mother allows in the house as some sort of pet. It is disgusting the way she acts Robert, disgusting … and you let her dictate to you like you have no mind of your own." She spat her words at him and watched his nostrils flare.

"Don't try to flatter me that you came to England for me Cora, you may have stayed for me but you came for the season looking for a title and now you will be Countess and you won't bother to learn from someone who had been one for years." Robert's words stung like he had slapped her across the face. Had he really stooped that low? After their beautiful honeymoon here they were again, this time dueling it out face to face rather than mulling it over in silence, but the result was the same – marital disharmony. Cora could play at that game, if he wanted insults then she could fling them back just as good as he could, perhaps even better … she was 'ghastly American' after all.

"If I am ever to have the title of Countess Robert" she spat each word out as if it were poison, "then it will be because I bought it"

Robert stared at his wife for several long seconds' anger blazing within him. Not knowing what else to say and being too tired to fight her any longer he turned and left the room, slamming the door behind him.


	21. Listening

It bothered Cora that part of what Robert said had been right, but she was barely ready to admit it to herself let alone anyone else, so she kept her righteous anger to herself and she and Robert remained mid squabble for another 3 days. Cora didn't think having a fight with her husband would be so unsettling and tiresome, but coupled with the fact that he was really her only friend here meant that she was left feeling irritated, sad, and terribly terribly lonely. She had no friends here whom she could call on to pass the time, she had not taken up any duties yet and had no charities to attend to. She had nothing but 24 hours worth of time per day to fill, with very little to fill it. She had taken to spending most of her afternoons going on long walks across the estate, which helped to both clear her mind and familiarize herself with her new home. She tried not to think how much better her walks would have been with Robert, she wanted to stay mad at him and thinking that way would not help. It was for this reason she had gathered her walking coat and gone into the gardens again this afternoon.

"May I join you Cora?" Patrick Crawley's distinguished voice interrupted her thoughts and she almost jumped. "I am sorry my dear, I did not mean to startle you"

"Oh not at all My Lord, I was simply lost in thought. Of course you may join me" Cora smiled at her father in law and took the arm he offered as they began to walk. She had not spent much time with him, definitely not alone at least and had not had the chance to get to know him, although she had observed him to be kind and fair.

"Please Cora, call me Patrick. You are my daughter now, one day you will be the mother of my grandchildren, I think you can dispense with the formalities" he chuckled good naturedly and Cora wondered if his wife would say the same thing. They seemed quite different and Cora wondered what had caused them to marry? Money? The right title? Love? Maybe one day she would get up the nerve to ask, today was not that day.

"Tell me, have you had the chance to visit the duck pond in the east section of the estate?" Patrick asked, "It is rather quaint and pretty"

"No My L… , Patrick, no I have not seen very much of the estate I am afraid" Cora felt herself relax in his presence and think of her own father, how she missed him and his silly jokes, the way he would pretend to be angry but broke into a smile when you least expected it.

"Well then, let's take a stroll shall we? It's a little ways across the estate, but you are young and sprightly … as long as you do not mind carrying me back, I am quite old" Cora laughed out loud and covered her mouth with her free hand. So like her father.

"I would love to" she smiled at the older gentleman and he steered them in the opposite direction. They walked for what must have been 30 minutes, talking about nothing in particular. Her family's homes in New York and Newport, the things she liked most in America, the things she missed. He spoke a little of his parents, a little about a few of the tenant farmers, some history of the village. Cora hung on his every word, he was fascinating to listening to. She felt she had come to know more about Downton, more about why it was so important to the Crawley's and it made her smile. He was a good man, he cared a great deal about his family and his estate and for a moment she thought of Robert. How like his father he was, so good and fair and kind. Coming around a bend Patrick announced with a flourish.

"There it is. Downton's own duck pond" he laughed and Cora smiled looking out at the vision before her. It was like a small mirage of water situated amid the lush green grass that seemed to go on for miles. The pond itself had a lush embankment of trees and several hedges of berry bushes secluding one side, but it was a large pond and you could avoid those if you wanted to. The sound of several ducks quaking and splashing as they walked into the water reminded Cora of her and Robert's own time spent feeding ducks in the park during their courtship. It seemed like so long ago now, and she sighed at the memory. Without thinking she opened her mouth.

"Robert and I used to feed the ducks at the park in London" she said sadly. She had not intended to voluntarily bring up her husband's name, but the view before her sparked the memory, and she had felt so comfortable it had just spilled out. Patrick patted the arm she had placed in the crook of his arm with his free hand and smiled at her, his eyes were so like Robert's it was disarming.

"Perhaps you two can feed them here too" he said gently. Cora wanted to cry. She had been so lonely this last week with no-one to talk to and nothing but her anger and frustration for company. It was wrong to burden her father in law with such matters, he did not need to know, but he was kind and he listened to her and asked her questions … and reminded her so much of Robert it was like a force not under her control.

"Oh, I don't think he wants to feed the ducks with me right now" she said softly, and quietly choked back a tear. She released her hand from his arm and turned her body away to hide her sadness. But when she felt Patrick's hand pat her gently on the back and tell his voice tell her it would be ok she lost it completely. He was so like her father, trying to protect her.

"I am so terribly sorry Patrick, I … this is most impolite of me, I …" Cora tried to make herself think of the right words but she couldn't form them. Finally after several minutes Patrick handed her a handkerchief and she dabbed at her eyes, the tears stopping but leaving her face red and tired looking.

"Cora, may I speak plainly with you?" Patrick asked kindly, she nodded. "My dear, marriage is a long, long business, and it will not always go the way you want it to. You and Robert have known each other only a few months, it will take a great deal longer than that to become accustomed to each other, to learn each other's moods and behaviors. What is important is that you talk to each other and try to make things right once they have gone wrong."

"I just don't know what to do to make things right? We said some awful things to each other" Cora admitted and lowered her head. Patrick nearly laughed.

"You have met my wife? Consider some of the disagreements we have had throughout the years" he smiled at his memories and Cora thought him to be the kindest man she knew, although did shudder a little at the thought of going toe to toe with Violet Crawley for as many years as Patrick had. "You will say things to each other that you don't really mean, and even if you do mean them … you will have to find ways to overcome them." Cora nodded her head understanding what his meaning and wondered if he had had a similar conversation with his son.

"Thank you, I never expected it to be this wonderful and horrible all at the same time" she confessed. She had no-one else to talk to, and he was here, she just let it tumble out. Patrick smiled a knowing smile.

"It is a very unusual business, but worth the trouble in the end." He looked out across the pond for a moment as if considering whether or not to share his thoughts, Cora looked at him hoping he would share whatever he thought, he was so helpful already. "Cora, I know you were disappointed at Robert's motives for courting you" Cora looked down and felt her heart pound in her chest once again, the pain seeping through her veins. "I know that you care for him a great deal"

"I love him" she said softly, correcting her father in law.

"Yes, I believe you do Cora, I can see that you do. You need to know that in all my life I have never seen Robert act the way he does with you" Cora's head shot up and she gave her Patrick a soft smile.

"Really?" it was a small thing, but it was worth the world to her.

"Yes Cora, really. I have never seen him care for someone else the way he does you. I have been observing him and he the first thing he does upon entering a room is look for you. He has been very protective of you to his mother, who can be rather overbearing I will admit, he gave her quite the scolding just the yesterday morning that she is still smarting from." He laughed at the thought of it "you mustn't tell her I was laughing about it though, I would be a dead man" he winked at Cora who stared at him in surprise, a grin forming at her lips.

"He did?" Patrick nodded in answer to her question.

"Oh yes, he told her to put away her claws and try teaching you how to be a Countess rather than trying to beat you into submission" Cora's mouth fell open and she covered it with her hand. "Of course she bristled at his words, but she knows she has been harsh on you"

"She does?" this was all news to Cora. She thought Violet could care less about how she treated her daughter in law, she thought Robert felt the same and was leaving her to fend for herself.

"Robert would not go up to bat against his mother for just anyone. He may not love you, but I believe he is on the verge of it and he doesn't even know it"

Robert had seen Cora looking at him during dinner and had looked over and offered her a quick smile before returning to his conversation with Sir Colby and Lady Aversly. Of all nights to have dinner guests of course it was tonight. Robert had spoken to his father this afternoon and he had helped him to see that his wife was all alone here, that marriage required time to get to know one another, and that perhaps swallowing a little pride would not hurt. He knew they needed to talk, and more than last time where they had simply apologized and moved on, they needed to actually discuss it so perhaps they could learn something about each other. Having her smile at him had boosted his confidence in this regard and he had the feeling that his father may have had a busier day than he had let on; perhaps Cora had been given a little marital advice as well. Either way, she seemed at least to have softened towards him and he was pleased, although it could have been for the benefit of their dinner guests, but he hoped not.

It was after the men had come through to join the ladies that Cora noticed Robert look over at her and offer a gentle smile. She returned it and looked back to Lady Colby who was finishing her thoughts about the latest gossip straight out of London. It wasn't that Cora was not interested in Lady Colby's conversation, in fact she had been craving feminine company and the idea of a friend, but with things having been so strained with Robert lately she was distracted and now he seemed to be responding to her clues that they should make up - it made it hard to focus. She wanted him to smile at her again. She wanted to talk to him. To feel his kiss and be held in his arms. She felt her cheeks grow warmer as she thought about it and she picked up the champagne next her and took a sip.

An hour passed with both Robert and Cora stealing glances and offering smiles at each other, neither leaving their post as host and hostess to talk with each other – what could they even say he wondered. He had observed her for the last hour, watched as she had blushed and drunk her champagne, watched her eyes flick to his direction, watched her stand and move to converse with another group of guests. He had observed the way her hips moved as she had walked to speak with their guests, appreciated the cut of her gown and let his mind roam to what he knew lay underneath. He knew they had a lot to discuss, but talking was the last thing on his mind as he watched his wife smile and laugh with Sir and Lady Aversly. Her eyes sparkled and she turned her head slightly to look in his direction, when she caught him looking at her she bit her lip and smiled before returning her gaze to their guests. It had been too many days of not speaking with her, holding her, feeling her against his body and he needed to be close to her. Excusing himself from Lady Colby and his mother he moved across the room towards his wife.

Cora had enjoyed the Aversly's company immensely; they were kind and interesting and enjoyed the way they interacted with each other. They had been married 5 years Lady Aversly had told her, she seemed to be in her mid 20's but her husband was definitely older than that, perhaps almost 40, yet their age difference did not seem to affect them as they cast eyes at each other and conversed freely. It was shortly after a comical story of Sir Aversly's that Cora spotted Robert making his way towards them and her heart did a somersault that reached all the way down to her stomach. He joined their group and together they moved into a discussion about their favorite places in France, and what artists they preferred. Cora was keenly aware of Robert's presence and felt herself growing warmer the longer he stood next to her. When after 10 minutes Sir Aversly excused he and his wife Cora and Robert were left standing at the back of the room alone. Robert leaned in and whispered in Cora's ear.

"You look ravishing tonight" Cora bit her lip and smiled, keeping her eyes straight ahead.

"You look very handsome as well" she said softly before leaning her head to the side and catching his eyes in hers. They were locked together in their stare, a thousand words spoken in one long gaze. Cora felt her heart beat faster her knees wobble at the intensity of his gaze.

Robert broke away from Cora's eyes and looked to the guests at the other end of the room. Everyone was busily engaged in conversation, backs to them, drinks in hand. It would be a while before they were alone, Robert needed to at least have the chance to hold his wife in his arms. Now was his chance, he didn't think she would rebuff him, but it was a risk. They had still not spoken about their disagreement, but he had a feeling she was eager to share some time with him too.

Thinking Robert had looked at their guests in order to indicate they should return to their duties Cora took a step in that direction, but was stopped by Robert's hand grabbing her arm and pulling her back. He placed a finger to his lips to indicate she should remain quiet and slowly backed them both toward the door that joined to the library. Cora looked at him confused, excited, unsure, but let him lead her through the door.

Robert quietly opened and closed the door and pulled his wife through with him. Once on the other side it took a moment for his eyes to adjust to the darkness, as no lamps had been lit in there. He prayed it was a sign they would not be disturbed. Turning to Cora he let go of her arm and stepped toward her backing her up until her back touched the first row of books and she could go no further. He closed the gap between them and stared down at her face, making out her sparkling blue eyes in the darkness.

"Robert" she gasped softly as he placed his hand on her stomach and ran it up the middle of her chest to her neck, then tracing his fingertip across her collarbone, along her shoulder and down her arm. Cora felt tingles throughout her body as his fingers brushed her skin and she thought she might tumble to the floor, he made her feel weak.

"Cora" he said softly, his voice soft and breathless. It was all he said before his lips came crashing against hers kissing her soundly. Cora returned the kiss eagerly and Robert was pleased he had read her desires correctly. Wrapping an arm up to his neck Cora invited him to continue with his kisses as she parted her lips and slid her tongue in his mouth, relishing the taste of him. Her other arms snaked up the front of his shirt and unknown to Robert was deftly undoing two of his shirt buttons. In the meantime Robert had let one hand drift to her side and slid it around her waist, the other slid up and down her left side sending a trail of sparks throughout her body. It was when he felt the skin of her hand against the skin of his chest that he drew back.

"Cora, what?" Cora silenced Robert pulling his head back to her lips and kissing him hungrily. She ran her hand gently across the hair of his chest and found his right nipple and rubbed it between her fingers gently. "Oh gosh" he exclaimed, pulling his lips from hers and moving them to her neck. Now it was Cora's turn to let out a moan of pleasure as he brushed his lips across the sensitive area around her neck and jaw line. She held the back if his head in her hand and brushed his nipple with the other. He moved both of his hands to either side of her slender waist and pulled her closer to him. Cora's breathing became more ragged as her husbands kisses moved down to her cleavage and he kissed the tops of her breasts just shown under her dress.

"We must go back Robert" she breathed with little conviction.

"I know" he said, his words came out muffled as he continued to taste her chest and pull her toward him. Cora slipped her hand out of his shirt and gently pushed him away, letting her hand slide from the back his neck, across his shoulder and down the length of his arm. Robert's hands slowly releasing her waist and coming to his sides. Looking into each others eyes and breathing deeply Cora was the first to move.

"Why don't you hold that thought" she said with a grin, and before he knew what was happening she reached up and kissed him on the lips and returned to the party, leaving him alone in the darkness. Finally, he thought he understood her a little better.


	22. Finding their way

They lay in Cora's bed, his head resting against Cora's stomach as they laced their fingers together and watched them separate again. It felt so natural, so comfortable and Robert was sure he was not leaving this room tonight. But he wasn't sure he could get away with it every night, and they needed to discuss things. As soon as their guests left Cora and Robert had taken themselves upstairs and finished what they had started in the library. It had been passionate, it had been born of their most base desires for one another, and it had left them both giddy with satisfaction. Now they lay together for the last 25 minutes speaking of great nothings and enjoying this moment together. Robert knew they had to talk, he did not want to ruin this time but wondered perhaps if this was the best place to discuss the issues of the last days. They were both relaxed and happy; maybe it would serve them better while they both had their guards down.

"Cora?" he asked gently, not quite sure where to begin. This was so new to him, people didn't get mad at him … well, except Mama and that was rather different. People didn't challenge his decisions or make him work for anything. It was new, it was unnerving – but he liked it. He liked it a great deal in fact. The way Cora held to her opinions and beliefs with such fervor made him both irritated that they did not match his own thoughts, yet exhilarated that she had such a keen mind.

"Yes?" she queried back as her hand stroked his hair, his head still resting on her naked stomach. He would argue with her every day if it could be like this at the end he thought with a smile.

"I think we aught to think about what happened over the last few days. I – I don't want to argue with you, but I would like to understand. … and for what it is worth, I am sorry for the way I approached things after you spoke with mother, I should have spoken with you instead of accusing you and I am sorry", he lifted his head and looked at her face when he spoke the last and was glad he had because he saw her face change into the softest, sweetest smile and he breathed a sigh of relief. She was not mad, he had done something right and he lay his head back down. "I will just stay here if you don't mind" he added with a little laugh. His head bobbed up and down slightly as Cora giggled at his comment, then he heard her take a breath, followed by the rhythmic sound of her voice.

"That is kind of you to say Robert, and I gladly accept your apology. I am sure I owe you one of my own, I do need to figure out a way to deal with your mother that doesn't involve you running to the rescue every time. I do need to learn about what my role will be, I understand that. It's just, I find it a little difficult to understand sometimes. I, well, I mean no disrespect but I don't always see things the way you do … by you I mean, the English … in America we are quite different. More different than I had ever expected. It's not so much the way of life or anything that is so hard to get a grip on; it's more the complete devotion to tradition. In the States we have traditions too, of course we do – although your mother would laugh at the thought I am sure, but if something doesn't work or isn't helping or making our lives better, then we do away with it. I come from a place where we make changes based on our needs and how to get the most out of life. Here I feel like you all just do things because that's how they are done, no questions asked – end of story."

Cora held her breath a moment and waited for Robert's response. She had tried to explain things to him as gently as she could. She wanted him to understand that things here were different and not as simple for her to understand as he might think. Maybe he would think she was young and silly, and she didn't want that. When he laced his fingers through her hand and bought it to his lips to kiss the back of it she let out the breath she was holding slowly. He seemed to understand.

"Cora, I had no idea. I, I never really thought of it I suppose. I am sorry if that seems callous, I just didn't." Robert felt unkind for not considering his wife's feelings on this. She had been raised with impeccable manners and education, the finest of everything, the best money could buy. But she was American, her experiences were different, her understanding of the way things are done were different, of course she would not think the same about the traditions he took as second nature. Kissing the back of her hand again he tried to offer her the comfort she needed, he wanted to be here for her.

Cora shut her eyes and smiled. How she loved him. He filled her heart and made her feel as though she could fly. They had already experienced a few bumps in their young marriage, but this was proof they were able to work things out together. She decided now was as good a time as any to move their conversation on to her other problem.

"Thank you Robert. You have made me so happy." She gushed opening her eyes as she spoke and shifting under his weight slightly. He lifted his head off her stomach and moved his body to lie next to her, holding firm to her hand and with one hand, and lifting his free hand up to place it on the other side of hers, sandwiching her one delicate between his large ones. Learning the lines and crevices of it, the way it felt, the softness of it.

"It is my distinct pleasure to make you so" he said as he caressed her hand between his. Despite lying naked in a bed with a man, Cora felt more safe and secure than she had ever felt. It bolstered her confidence and she spoke gently.

"Robert? I should like to ask you about staying the night with me. I … that is to say, I … I should like you to stay with me every night, to be as it is now, just the two of us alone" even though they were married and it was quite allowed for her to speak with him openly, she still felt her cheeks grow slightly pink. She had laid herself bare before him, she had felt so secure, she hoped he understood that he had the capability to crush her or lift her to the heavens. She was, as her one hand, in the palm of his.

Robert tilted his head and looked at her face, she had closed her eyes and he felt a drop in his stomach. She was worried what he would say, his response had power to bring her joy or sadness and it struck him at the power and responsibility he had for this amazing woman. His wife. She loved him, and regardless of his feelings he held her heart in his hands. He squeezed her hand.

"Cora, I enjoy very much sleeping the night with you. Seeing you in the morning, hair lying across the bed and arms stretched out is a beautiful sight indeed." He saw her smile and open her eyes, turning her head on her pillow to face him. Their eyes were gazing into each others, their faces close.

"You are flattering me … and avoiding the question" she stated plainly, a smirk playing at the corner of her lips. They were so close she could feel the breath coming out of his lips against her face, it felt gentle, warm, sensual.

"A gentleman doesn't flatter Cora, he tells the truth" he smirked at her, inching closer to her.

"And yet, you are still avoiding the question" she whispered, running a hand down the length of his side and back up. "You see, after we have … uh, … experienced each other" Cora blushed at her own words. Robert let go of the hand he was holding and wrapped his arm around her waist dragging her closer to him, pressing their bodies together.

"Like this?" he whispered.

"Yes" she breathed, "Just like this." Feeling the familiar stirrings of excitement grow in her stomach and lower, she mustered her strength and dove ahead, she had brought it up now, she wanted to put it to bed. "It's … oh my…" Robert had leaned closer and begun to softly kiss the curve of her neck, his tongue warm and soft, teasing her.

"You were saying" Robert murmured, his lips against her neck. He had already decided he would stay with her. He had formulated a plan, he was going to throw that tradition out the window and show his wife he would be the man she needed him to be. In the morning he would approach Alice, the maid who cleaned his room and give her a generous bonus if she kept his bed made up in his room, and her mouth shut about its lack of use. Mother need never find out, he would get to sleep next to his wife and make love to her at will, his wife would be happy. He couldn't lose. His genius made him feel powerful, and it excited him.

"It's, just that I feel so close to … oh Robert …"she breathed, his hand had slid down past her hip and between her thighs, slowly circling a trail up between her legs where he had come to rest his hand. He was gently rubbing and teasing her there at an agonizingly slow speed, while his lips and tongue caressed her neck gently.

"Please go on" he said as evenly as if he were in a business meeting, in the meantime he was caressing and fondling his wife to distraction. She reached her hands around his neck and hang on tight.

"I feel so close to … oh my …you, and I feel like … aah." Cora bit her lip as his fingers changed speeds and touched her with greater need. She felt the way he was responding to her excitement pressing against her leg. She needed to get this out and fast. "Like I need you with me after. … Oh gosh, oh gosh … like I want to be be …. Oooh, mmmmm …. Near you … Gosh Robert!" she cried out, unable to finish any more of her speech. She lifted his head from her neck and pulled his mouth to hers in a passionate kiss, crashing their lips together as their tongues touched and teased the other. Leaning back Robert rolled onto his back, pulling her on top of him with his hand, and freeing the other from between her thighs maneuvered her to straddle his erection. She gasped and her eyes went wide, she stared at him and looked to him for confirmation. This was new, she was unsure, she needed his guidance.

Smiling up at her he spoke, "I agree with you Cora, let's throw out that silly tradition and do this instead", with that he guided her hips down against him and she slid down, taking him onto her with a soft cry of pleasure. Spurred on by the renewed delight he saw on her face her placed both hands on her hips and showed her how to move against him. Up and down, pulsing, rocking. He enjoyed looking up at her face, the way her hair flew about her shoulders and her breasts bounced up and down as she moved. Their combined gasps of pleasure and exertion filled the room and she placed her hands flat against his chest and took control of her movements against him. Her cries were louder than he had ever heard her moans deep and desirable. With a quickening of her motions she cried out in ecstasy and breathed his name. Pushing hard against her he thrusted again and again until he joined her there, and she collapsed against his chest breathless and smiling.

Running his hand up and down her back Robert spoke softly against her ear, "I'm going to enjoy sleeping with you" … and he meant it.


	23. Marital Bliss

The next few months seemed to float by, fluctuating between states of wedded bliss, complete contentment, and disgruntled misunderstandings and miscommunications. It had become interesting to Cora that their marriage bed had become the temperature gauge for how things were going between the young couple. If all was well they shared Cora's bed, some nights just to sleep in it together but more often than not to enjoy each other's bodies first. If things were on a rockier path, Robert slept in his room alone. Once he had taken himself there after an argument about his mother. Once she had sent him there after a particular squabble about the way he had greeted the Earl of Dainbridge's new young wife. Robert maintained vehemently that he had treated her no different than any other female there, of course with the exception of Cora. Cora had insisted he was looking at her too long, it had caused her the greatest pain to think of him having thoughts of other women and she had sent him from her bed for 5 nights. Once they made up … in the day room after his parents had gone to sleep, against the settee … Cora had admitted it was just good old jealousy, she knew Robert had not flirted with anyone else. What she hadn't told him was that she started her period the day of the event in question, which signaled to her once again that she was not pregnant – a crushing blow.

But they had sailed along more happily than not, learning about each other and enjoying each other. Two things hung in the air hovering above their marriage like a dark cloud waiting to bring the rain.

One was the drafting of the documents the Crawley lawyer had been drafting for months that Cora would have to soon sign giving over her dowry. Her father had stipulated that the she not be asked to sign anything until 6 months into her marriage, that if she had not been made happy she would not have to sign and could dissolve the marriage and return to the States with her money. This had been kept from Cora, and when she learned of it from Patrick one evening she was shocked. Although she appreciated her father's concern, she knew that if such a stipulation ever were to be made public it would be a most embarrassing scandal. It helped to explain Violet's attitude towards her. Cora had smiled kindly at Patrick and explained to him that she had indeed been made very happy at Downton and in her marriage, he needn't worry, she would sign whatever he placed before her. She would never take away what Robert had needed to save Downton, and she could never stop loving him – she was stuck.

The second cloud was Cora's lack of pregnancy. Robert had not uttered a word on the subject unless first bought up by Cora, and had been kind stroking her back and encouraging her to be patient. She knew it made him feel a little awkward to discuss things of a medical nature, and so the fact he sat next to her the morning he found her crying into her pillow after realizing she was not pregnant again had spoken volumes to her. She had finally told him his mother had commented on her 'Defective American womb' and she had seen his face redden as he left the room. She took comfort in the fact that he was taking on his mother on her behalf, but part of her wondered why it was not happening, and Violet's comments kept her fears creeping in to her mind. She had been taught by her mother that marital relations led to pregnancy. She had been told to guard her virtue, and the risk of pregnancy had been one of the reasons, she had not known it would take so long. Why had she thought it would happen quicker? How foolish she had been. She had spoken to the Dr several weeks ago and he had explained that sometimes these things took a little longer than one would hope, but he saw no reason 2 young people like themselves couldn't achieve a positive pregnancy after a reasonable amount of time. Cora knew they were completing the task that would get her pregnant more than regularly, but still she remained without child and it worried her.

Robert was pleased with the way things had been going with Cora. Making the choice to sleep in his wife's bed had been the best decision he had made. He was fairly sure his mother had figured it out though, she'd made several under her breath comments about American sleeping habits and he knew it was only a matter of time before she came straight out with it. He was ready though, months of sleeping next to Cora and he was hooked. He would stand up to his mother when that time came, and Cora would appreciate him all the more for it. Sometimes he felt as if he could do no wrong. Cora loved him and he could not imagine a better wife if her tried. She seemed to grow more beautiful by the day, she kept him entertained with their lengthy discussions and she shared with him interesting facts she had read, or poems she had liked. He enjoyed talking to her, liked her points of view, thrilled with the way she touched him … he was happier than he had ever been.

He knew Cora was worried about getting pregnant, his mother had made comments and his father had chimed in as well. His father wanted Cora to be pregnant by the time she signed the papers handing over her dowry, knowing that if she were it would guarantee her signature even if she was not happy. Robert had told his father Cora would sign regardless, he needn't worry. Robert had asked to see the papers and his father had told him they weren't yet completed, but Robert felt a little uneasy at the way his father had approached the subject and couldn't help but wonder why? He made a note to ask him about it again, and had promptly forgotten when Cora had entered the room in a new lilac day dress. She took his breath away and he liked it. He had planned a surprise for her that day, and she was dressed ready to receive it.

"I had no idea what you had planned and so could not dress accordingly" Cora said with a pouty grin as Robert left the confines of his desk to join her side. He smiled as he lay a chaste kiss against her cheek before adding.

"You, as always, look the picture of perfection" Cora smiled wide and her eyes sparkled, which in turn caused Robert to grin even bigger than before. She had a way of making him feel better than anyone else, she walked into the room and he felt happier all of a sudden. Robert was not sure what to call such a feeling, but he knew he could not imagine life without his gorgeous American wife.

They had walked for rather a long time and Cora realized she recognized the direction they were headed although she kept it to herself. She did not want to ruin her husband's surprise, not when he was taking such joy in the task of surprising her. She was glad she knew where they were headed as she was growing rather tired all of a sudden and knew they would be arriving at the pond soon. Robert had been most attentive, although he usually was anyway and Cora often thanked the good Lord above for blessing her with a kind and faithful husband, if not one who loved her. She hoped he had arranged for food though, as his hands were completely free of a basket or sack, and she was growing hungrier with each passing step. Trying to forget her discomfort she smiled and nodded as Robert relayed a story of his youth. She loved learning more about him, and eventually she forgot about the hunger and fatigue, or perhaps they passed on their own.

"Here it is, the Downton duck pond" Robert said with a grand gesture and a flourish of his arms. Cora gave the expected gasp of joy, Robert continued. "I know it is not much really, but it reminds me so much of our walks in London when we courted, and I have wanted to show you ever since you came to Downton"

"Oh Robert it's wonderful." Cora gushed, "Whatever took you so long" she laughed, chiding him half heartedly. When Robert's face dropped into a slight frown Cora worried that perhaps she had come across quite rudely and she hurried to make amends, "Oh, I am sorry Robert, I didn't mean it"

Robert shook his head and smiled, "I know that Cora, of course. I did have plans to bring you here actually, the day after our wedding … but …"

Cora realized that he was not mad at all, but a little sad as he relived the memory and it made her heart swell for him. Gosh, he was such a good good man, and she loved him all the more for it. "I left you all alone that day" Cora interrupted him, she rose up onto her tip toes and placed a soft kiss against his cheek "I am very sorry my dear, but I would love you to show it to me now"

Robert too great pleasure in walking hi wife around the pond. He had arranged for the servants to lay a picnic blanket with a basket of cooks specially prepared luncheon contained by the more secluded part of the pond so as to protect them from any wind that may pick up. He had also bought some bread in his pocket to feed the ducks and took it out as they strolled the length of the pond, each of them taking turns throwing bread to the overfed ducks and laughing as they wagered with each other which duck would take the bread first. It was silly really, how something so childlike could bring him such joy. Finally, having rid themselves of all their bread Robert walked them over to their picnic blanket and basket and helped Cora sit down before joining her on the ground.

"Thank goodness for you Robert, I am so hungry that the sight of this basket make me want to cry, or kiss you, or both" Cora laughed as Robert leaned his cheek forward pointing to the spot he expected his kiss to be laid. Leaning closer Cora placed one against his cheek and laughed as he smiled a satisfied grin.

"Worth all the cooking I had to do to get that kiss" he teased as Cora laughed once more.

"Really? You cooked this feast did you?" Cora asked as she opened the basket and began pulling items out. Plates, bread, cheese, ham, lemon cake, blueberries, butter … it really was a feast.

"But of course My Lady, I am your humble servant"

They spent an hour talking and eating the meal cook had prepared, Robert finally confessing what they both already knew, that he had nothing to do with the contents of the picnic basket save having made a request of the cook 2 days earlier. They laughed as Robert tried to throw blueberries into the air and catch them with his mouth. They cheered as Cora threw them into the air and he actually managed to succeed in catching them with his mouth. They fought away a rogue duck intent on the last of Cora's lemon cake, and Cora giggled in delight as she watched Robert chase the duck waving his arms wildly. It had been the most picture perfect afternoon, and as they lay on their back side by side staring up at the clouds Cora did not think of her lack of pregnancy, nor did Robert think of the dowry papers due to be signed in a months time. They simply lay there, occasionally pointing out the odd shape of a cloud, or the way the breeze shifted against the treetops.

Robert finally gathered the courage to speak on something he had been wanting to say for a while. "Cora, I would like to tell you something if I may?" he suddenly felt nervous.

"Of course" Cora said, staring into the sky.

"I feel as though I have not expressed myself to you as I should have, and well, you know the reasons for our courtship and that whole situation is clear." He felt a lump forming in his throat; Cora turned her head to the side and looked at him tenderly.

"Yes, I know all of that. It is fine Robert."

"I just thought you should know that, well, I feel as though before you I was asleep, and now I am wide awake … but like some kind of dream … you will think me silly, I am not poetic at all and my explanations are lacking in flair … I … I … apologi …"

"Don't apologise." Cora jumped in interrupting him in haste; she held her hand up and lay it against his chest as if stopping him physically would help stop his words. "I do not need a poet, or an apology for that matter. I need a husband, as sweet and delightful as you Robert Crawley. You may explain yourself to me in any way you like, it will make me very happy, very happy indeed." It was not a declaration of love, she knew she may very well never get that from him, but it was the closest thing she had and she would take it, with two hands she would take it and hold onto it.

"Thank you Cora. You are … you are magnificent" he breathed as he leaned across and lay a gentle kiss to her lips.

"You are quite something yourself Robert" she whispered against his lips and brought her hand from his chest to the side of his face guiding him back for another kiss. This time she increased the intensity and encouraged him to kiss her longer by sliding her hand from his cheek to the side if his neck holding him in place. Robert drew back a little and breathed his wife's name like a question.

"Cora?"

In answer Cora kissed him again, turning to her side as she did and pressing her body against his. Robert kissed her back but pulled back once more as he felt the heat growing between them.

"Cora, perhaps we should walk back now" he was being turned on by his wife's kisses, the nearness of her body, they could walk back and still have a little time before the dressing gong.

Cora responded by shaking her head 'no' and running her the palm of her hand down the front of Robert's chest all the way down until it rested against the growing bulge in his pants, he gasped.

"What are you doing?" He asked in shock as Cora leaned in and kissed his neck before gently biting his earlobe.

"I would have thought you could have figured it out by now" she said seductively in his ear as she moved her palm up and down the rise in his pants. She could hear his breath getting quicker and pressed herself closer to him.

"Yes, yes I understand what, but … here? Let's go back and pick up in your room darling … ohhh – you have to stop before I can't … aaahhh" he was fighting against the delightful touch of her hand against him and the rhythmic motion she had begun combined with the soft biting and licking she was placing against his neck and earlobes was proving hard to ignore.

"The house is too far Robert" she breathed against his neck as she began to wriggle her body against his, plucking all her courage and deciding she was already half way there so she might as well go all in she spoke directly in his ear in a seductive whisper, "I need you to touch me now" the groan she heard escape his lips sent a shiver through her like she had not experienced before. It was amazing to feel the way he wanted her. Still he lay motionless for a few moments as she moved her body against his, her palm rubbing the length of his stiffness through his trousers. Feeling that she really did want the touch of her husband against her skin she gave one last attempt at coercing him with words, whispering into his ear once again. "Oh please Robert, don't make me beg"

Before she would realize what was happening he had placed his hand around her waist pulling he against his body tightly, then hoisting them both up and laying her down on her back against the blanket, his body laying on top of hers. "My gosh Cora" he said with a raspy voice, the desire written like fire in his eyes, "I want you so much"

Recovering from the surprise of their sudden change of position Cora let a small smile play at the corners of her lips as she slowly licked them and said, "Then have me"

And so he did.


	24. The end and the beginning

"This is ridiculous, it is little more than legal theft!" Cora exclaimed looking at Robert for help. Her throat went dry when she realized none would be coming. He had known this was the plan, all along he had known her money would be tied into the estate so tightly that there she could never touch it. Patrick spoke in a calm voice.

"I know it seems harsh Cora, but you and Robert will have Downton eventually, so it does make sense for your money to be a part of the estate in this way … you will see …" Cora held up her hand cutting him off as briskly as she could. She threw a deathly cold stare at Robert and held her hand out for the pen.

"Where do I sign?" she clipped her words angrily before signing where Patrick's lawyer gestured on the documents. 3 signatures was all it took for all of Cora's money to be forever tied to Downton. She threw the pen down on the table and turned on her heals and stalked out of the room, slamming the door behind her. She could care less that Patrick was there or his lawyer for that matter. She had been fooled and handled and treated like a nobody for months. Suddenly her surroundings seemed to her more a prison than a home and she flew up the stairs as fast as she could to begin her escape.

Robert had seen the hurt on Cora's face when the reality of it all had come crashing down on her. He had seen how upset she was and it broke his heart into a million pieces. He ached for her and wanted to comfort her and make it all better. Clearing his throat after a few minutes he spoke quietly, "If you will excuse me father, Mr. Jameson, I should check on my wife". Patrick nodded his approval and Robert made his way slowly in the direction of her room. He wondered how mad she would be at him? Her eyes had told him she felt he had betrayed her, used her, fooled her. He tried to think what he could do or say to make it up to her, but he felt defeated, tired, out of breath. There seemed to be a deep ache in his heart and he felt sick to his stomach over it. Reaching her door her knocked softly and heard her beckon him in.

"Bring the cases Willis, we are packing and …"Cora had begun with her back to the door looking at the open armoire of clothes as she pulled dresses out and laid them on the bed, but when she turned and saw Robert she stopped in her tracks and stood up straight. Her face was red from the strain of the tears she had already spilled, although none fell presently. "What in the hell are you doing in here?" she yelled at him, "Get out! Get out of my room!" she pointed to the door as she spoke, but Robert closed it behind him and locked it for good measure.

"I know you are upset Cora" he began gently, quietly, almost reverently "But if you will please let me explain …"

"You get to explain nothing!" she hissed. "How dare you come in here and think that you can talk your way into my good graces. How dare you? Who do you think you are?" she turned and began gathering more clothes from her closet. There was a knock at the door, Robert assumed was Willis and he called through the door. "Not now!" which caused Cora to whip around to face him once more.

"Don't send her away, I need her to help me"

"With what? What are you doing Cora?" Robert's tone remained soft and gentle and sincere as he took more steps towards his wife. His heart was filled with pain and sadness for her, and it hurt him to see her so upset, so broken - to know he was the cause broke him in two.

"Leaving. You've done it plenty of times at night, surely you can recognize the gesture when you see it" she didn't really speak her words to him, they were more like a hiss, as if she was spitting venom in his direction and trying to wound him as deeply as he had wounded her. Robert had walked to where she stood between her bed and her armoire and stopped a few feet in front of her. Even angry she was the most beautiful creature he had ever seen.

"Please don't do that" he asked sadly, he felt as though he could cry. The thought of waking up tomorrow and Cora being gone was like a knife to his stomach, he could barely breathe.

"Why ever would I stay here? You and your father have played me for a complete fool for what is it, 6 months now? Your mother can barely stand me and makes that painfully clear with every passing comment. Give me one good reason why I should stay here?" she was yelling again, her hands trembling as her anger grew. She could not be the girl who stayed and got trampled underfoot for the rest of her life, she would just die, and she couldn't do that. Not now anyway.

"Because I love you" Robert said staring into her eyes. He had not known how she would react to hearing those words from his lips for the first time. He had thought perhaps tears, maybe laughter, joy, a warm embrace … he had not known what would happen, what he had never thought would happen was to feel the sharp sting of her hand as it slapped him across his face and the sound of her voice as she cursed at him.

"Go to hell"

"Cora, I …" he held one hand against his cheek to feel the sting and stared at her in disbelief. She interrupted him screaming at the top of her lungs.

"How dare you?" she lifted both her hands and shoved as hard as she could against his chest but he did not move, she was not strong enough to move him but she shoved him anyway, and he made no move to stop her. If she had looked in his face she would have seen the sad lost look in his eyes, the desperate fear written across his face and the silent tears that had begun to fall. For it was true, he did love her, and he had finally found the strength to tell her - but perhaps it was too late.

"How dare you?" she yelled again a little quieter than before shoving him as hard as she could, the top half of his body moved slightly, but his feet stayed grounded. "How dare you? How dare you say that to me? How dare you?!" she thumped against his chest with her fists, pounded against him in anger and despair, her tears returning in great droves and her mind swirling. "You are a liar" she spat at his face as she pounded her fists against his chest with less force, her energy spent. Finally he reached his hands up and gently grabbed both her wrists in his hands stilling her movements. She struggled against his grip for a moment, but when he didn't let go she stopped trying to pull away.

Looking into her icy cold stare he spoke evenly and with purpose, "I have never lied to you Cora, and I never will."

Cora's face contorted into an angry line, "I don't believe you anymore Robert. How convenient of you to suddenly discover you love me when you have just stolen my money and there is a baby on the way. What incredibly advantageous timing on your part. You must think I am a stupid American with no mind of her own. Well I do have a mind of my own, and I intend to use it to pack my things and leave this house tonight!" Cora took a step back as he dropped her wrists at the shock of her words. Robert tried to register what she had said. Baby? Their baby?

"Did you say baby?" Cora, what do you mean?" Robert took a step towards her and she mirrored his actions by taking a step back. She formed her face into a cruel smile.

"Oh yes, congratulations Robert, you are to be a father. Let's all hope it's a boy so at least my son can inherit my money and do what he likes with it" Cora turned around and moved over to the bed to sort clothes for packing. She would go to London, and from London maybe New York for a time. There could be no divorce of course, but there could be distance and that is what she needed. She could not be with him any longer. It was too painful and too hard for her to get her heart ripped out again and again.

"C – C – Cora, I … why have you not told me before? I – this is wonderful darling – I am … speechless … I am …"Robert stammered trying to gather his thoughts. A baby?! How marvelous, a baby. Their baby. He loved his wife, they were having a baby, everything should be perfect – and yet here she was, screaming at him and packing to leave. He began to panic and rose up through his gut and into his chest where it sent shock waves through his heart. The pain was unbearable. Losing her was not an option, he would rather die. "Cora, please stop packing, we need to talk about this. I will do anything Cora please." He had never had to beg for anything in his life. He had lived a blessed and charmed life, the son of an Earl, the heir to a great title. Somehow none of that mattered when he thought of what was at stake here. The future Earl of Grantham would beg for his wife, for his baby, for his love. "Cora!" he yelled desperately approaching her, "Please!" he begged, tears falling from his eyes. He had never been as afraid of anything in his life as he was at this very moment. When she turned and looked at him he thought he would break apart.

"It's too late Robert. Just stop it, stop this" she had ceased yelling at least, but her words held no feeling in them. She was cold, dismissive, resigned to the future she had decided upon and it sliced Robert's heart like a knife. His whole life lay before him and he could feel it slipping away. He was desperate and vulnerable when he sank to his knees before her reaching his arms out towards her.

"Please" he begged through the glistening wetness of his tears, "Don't leave. I love you Cora, I love you and I need you and I can't be without you, Oh heaven please don't leave" Cora looked down in shock, the sight of her husband kneeling before her, arms outstretched with tears in his eyes was not a sight she thought she would ever witness. It plucked at her heart and she closed her eyes to stop him penetrating the cold exterior she had formed. She tried to grab his hands to force him up off the floor, but her resisted and instead pulled her close to him, his face resting against her stomach as he wrapped his arms around her legs and held on for dear life.

"Stop Robert, it is too late" she wanted to say more but her voice cracked and she had to hold her hand to her mouth to cover the sound of her own cries. Why did he have to wait until now? This was so unfair. She couldn't stay here, not now. But here he was, begging on the floor like some common man, not the future Earl of Grantham, it was disarming and it stirred her heart.

"Don't say that" he breathed against her stomach, "Please, don't say that" he knew he sounded desperate, which was probably for the best because he was. He would do anything for her to stay, he loved her, and that love had quite possible driven him mad. "I love you Cora. I do. I honestly do" he looked up from her stomach where he was pressed against her and caught her eyes as she looked down at him, her hands resting on his shoulders. He watched her bite her lip to keep from sobbing and he felt again the pain and anguish of being the one to cause her so much pain. "I think I may have always loved you, I just didn't know what it was, and I was scared, and I was the worst kind of fool. And now I kneel before you a broken and a foolish man who loves you more than life itself. Please Cora, give me a chance to show you how much I love you. Let me be the man you always thought me to be." She turned her head to the side to remove her face from his gaze, this was all too much to take in. "I know I have hurt you, I know today has hurt you more than I could ever know – but you need to know that when you are in pain, I am in pain. I hurt for you Cora. You are part of me, you are in my blood and under my skin and are a part of me like I never thought a person could be. I love you. I love you, please, please stay with me, oh please stay" he buried his head against her stomach and tried to hold on for dear life. After several minutes she pushed against his shoulders and stepped backwards out of his embrace. He let her go, and at her bidding he stood up and faced her. She leveled him with her gaze, her eyes no longer filled with tears, but red and swollen from the ones that had so recently passed over them.

"I do believe you Robert" she said softly, almost a whisper, it gave Robert the hope of a mirage in the dessert and he reached a hand toward her. She held her hand up to stop him touching her and he frowned once more. This was not over.

"I believe you love me, and it is so surreal to me now after all this time. I had wanted to hear those words pass you lips for the longest while. It broke my heart every day that you didn't feel that way about me. Despite all of this" she indicated to her clothes prepared for packing, "I do love you still" the words caused Robert's heart to soar, "but I have learned over these last 6 months that love is not always enough" and his heart plummeted again. He felt sick. "But if you can agree to something, then I will stay with you, and we will love each other as I always hoped we would". Robert looked at her hopefully, willingly.

"Anything, yes, gosh Cora anything." He stepped forward to close the gap between them and took her hands in his, she let him and he felt like the King of England. She was going to let him love her; his heart began to piece itself back together.

"Leave Downton with me" and just like that it was shattered once more.


	25. Together

Robert felt as though he could not breathe, he was simultaneously aware of everything and nothing all at once. He could hear the sound of his heart beating and yet could not feel it. He could hear Cora breathing but could not see her chest rise and fall .He felt weak, he felt defeated, he was literally at a loss for what to do. If ever there was a rock and a hard place this was it. He found his way to Cora's bed and sat down on it looking into space, not focusing on anything, trying to find something to say.

"Robert?" Cora finally asked softly, standing in front of him with her head tilted to one side.

"But, but … I love you Cora. I …" he could not finish his sentence; he did not know what the finish was. He loved his wife, he finally knew what he should have known all along, and now it was all too late. Now he had to choose – how could he make that choice? Leave and love Cora forever but give up on his duty, abandon his responsibilities, break his fathers heart, incur the wrath if his mother. Or, let Cora leave without him, endure the grief of his broken heart for the rest of his life, miss out on the life of his child, endure scandal and ridicule … endure the wrath of his mother. There was no goo d choice.

Cora stood her ground and straightened to her full height, her back stiff and regal, her neck impossibly elongated and proud; her voice was soft, calm, as if she had not just rocked the entire world on its axis.

"I understand Robert, I am so very happy that you feel that way, and I don't say this to hurt you at all – that is not my intent."

"Then why ask it?" Robert snapped, quickly regretting the force of his words. He wanted to be furious with her for asking such a thing of him. He wanted to yell and shout and demand that she accept his love and be done with the rest of this. He wanted her to understand what it had cost him to offer her his love; he was vulnerable, open, in a territory completely foreign to him. He had never felt this way before, he had never known this was even possible, and now he felt helpless.

Cora looked down at him and set her mouth into a thin smile, she was losing her patience with this. He had professed his love, she was happy to hear the words … finally, believed he meant it, knew what it cost him … but now he sat in a stunned daze not willing to let his new found love move him to any sort of action. It frustrated her beyond words. She had been the one loving in this relationship since the start, she had lived in a loveless marriage unable to stop herself from loving someone who couldn't love her back … and now he finally loved her and he thought just saying the words would do. She wanted to scream at him and yell and make him understand that love is more than the words you say, it's the things you do. Instead she took a deep breath, opened her mouth and spoke evenly.

"I am sure to you it seems an unfair request to make. I am sure you feel frustrated by this. I do understand …"

"Really?! You understand? Cora, how could you understand the position you have put me in. It is unfathomable." Robert interrupted her and stood to his feet, finally gathering his wits about him and finding his voice. He reached out and held her arms, he wanted to touch her, hold her and help her see sense. He loved her, what good could any of this do?

"I am the only person who can understand. Are you seriously doubting that?" Cora could not believe her ears. She had made her ultimatum on somewhat of a whim, she had not been sure what Robert's reaction would be, she did not expect him to act as though he was the only one making a sacrifice. It caused her to grow angry at the thought process he obviously had and she pulled away out of his grasp.

"You are asking me to give up everything!" Robert stared at her with disbelief written on his face. Cora loved him, she did, always had, but right now she wanted to shake him. She could not believe the words coming out of is mouth. Was he that clueless?

"Yes Robert, I am familiar with the concept. I gave up everything for this marriage, and you gave up what exactly? Your bedroom?" Cora was fighting to keep the anger out of her voice but it was not working, she was losing the battle she waged with herself, she was so frustrated and angry she needed some space. She needed to get out. She needed to leave Robert's presence before she said something she regretted, something she couldn't take back.

Clearly taken aback at her words Robert's voice came out hurt, "You act like I kidnapped you or forced you to com here. I never thought …"

Cora interrupted him, "No, you never did, did you?" Cora slowly made her way towards the door, before Robert could speak she lowered her voice and spoke softly, "I need some air, I am going to take a walk … by myself." Almost as an afterthought with her hand on the doorknob Cora added, "I would like your answer when I get back please. I intend to leave for London tomorrow" and then she left the room, closing the door behind her.

Cora walked and walked and walked. Her legs seemed to take her of their own will, she just let them guide her along the path and didn't notice the direction she was going. Her mind was racing, her heart was pounding and tears threatened to fall as every new thought crossed her mind. What if Robert chose Downton over her? Would she really leave as she had threatened? Could they move on from this if she did stay? Now she knew he loved her she wanted them to be together, to love each other as she had dreamed. But the stubborn part of her could not just let him say the words and not move him to action. It made her chest hurt and she thought she could even feel her heartbreak at the possibility of being without him.

Robert sat in Cora's room for over an hour. He expected her to come back soon anyway, despite the fact that he did not want to talk with anyone about what had happened. He needed to sort out his feelings, wade through his thoughts and come to a solution. When she had uttered those words he had felt his heart tear apart. He had no easy way out of this, it was going to painful one way or another, he had to decide which would cause the least amount of pain. He had already decided really, he had known as soon as she said the words – he just hadn't come to terms with how to deal with the loss. It would be acute, he wished there was another way, maybe in time things would change – but for now, there really wasn't a choice. He hoped they could get through this. The longer he waited the more tired he became, and feeling exhausted from the weight of his decision he lay on Cora's bed breathing in her scent from the pillows and fell asleep.

The longer she walked the more she calmed down. She found herself in familiar surroundings and felt a tear begin to fall as she came upon the duck pond. Of course she would end up here, where every memory reminded her of Robert, of the best of Downton. They had visited several more times since their first, and it become their special place. They had made love next to that pond more than once, she let her hand drift to her stomach and sighed at the thought of the baby growing inside her. She was sure that the baby had been conceived there, or at least she thought of it that way in her head. She had planned to tell Robert about the baby at the pond, just the two of them alone. Instead she had thrown the news at him during an argument, she felt an overwhelming sense of guilt over that and she knew she had to apologize to her husband. She was so deep in her own thoughts she did not notice the dark clouds that had grown angrier since she had left the house. She was so busy thinking about what Robert was doing that she didn't realize until it was too late that large drops of rain had begun to fall. Looking up at the sky Cora realized she had gone too far from the house and the rain looked violent and plentiful in no way ready to stop. She had a choice to make, try to wait it out in the barely covered seclusion of the bushed and trees around the pond, or start back towards the house – more than 30 minutes away even if she hurried. Cursing herself for not being more aware Cora decided she had better head back to the house and turned from the pond to run up the embankment in that direction. The ground had already begun to get muddy so close to the pond and as she turned on her heal and stepped up the bank she slipped and fell to the ground with a great thud. Her hand went straight to her stomach as she thought of her baby, their baby, she and Robert's child. She felt no pain, she was sure she was fine, just wet and dirty and in need of getting home. She made to stand and as she tried to put pressure on her left leg she collapsed again, this time feeling sharp pain shooting through her ankle. She clutched at it and tried to stand again, this time crying out as the pain shot through her ankle with greater intensity the more she tried to stand. She fell again to the ground and looked around her in horror. She was alone, she was far from the house, she was already saturated, and now she was also in pain. She would not walk, the house was too far away to even see so yelling would not help. After several panicked minutes trying to figure out what to do Cora tried to stand and hop her way toward the shelter of the trees. The pain was made worse with each step, she cried out in pain as tears raced down her cheeks. She fell down twice more until she finally had to drag herself the final few feet into the somewhat covered shelter of the nearest bushes. She was still getting wet, but it was better than before. With nothing left to do she curled into a ball and cried into her arms.

Robert opened his eyes to the sound of the door opening; his wife's maid stood looking at him in confused silence. Robert sat up, he had slept a long while, looking at the window he saw a storm raged outside and it made him shiver.

"I am terribly sorry My Lord" the maid said, "I came to dress Lady Cora for dinner, but I do not see her" she looked about the room confused.

"The dressing gong has rung?" he asked, she nodded. "Perhaps she is downstairs" Robert offered as he stood and made towards his own room. He stopped as he saw her shake her head.

"No My Lord she is not" Robert stopped in his tracks. Where was she? She had left hours ago. His eyes moved back to the window and the evening darkness that had begun to fall across the storm that raged outside.

"Are you quite sure?" He asked again. When she nodded he felt the pit of his stomach drop and he bolted for the door.

Cora lay in the increasing darkness and cried for her foolishness, for her physical pain, for her tender and bruised heart. She had been wrong to give Robert such an ultimatum, to threaten to take his child from him, to ask him to sacrifice as much as she had. He had never asked her to do that, true she had left everything for their marriage, but there was not an ultimatum – it was just expected really. Not even by Robert so much as by Cora's own parents, by his parents, even by herself. Why would she ask him to go through the dame thing? Wasn't part of why she loved him the wonderful way he was dutiful and kind? He would be a wonderful Lord Grantham when the time came, she could not take that from him. She hoped it was not too late to tell him she had been wrong, horribly wrong.

Robert felt the darkness beginning to envelope him as he rode his horse Triumph across through the storm headed for the pond. He knew she was there, there couldn't be anywhere else. His father had insisted on sending some male servants into other areas to search, and had gone on his own horse in the other direction. Robert appreciated the concern, but he was sure she was at the pond; they had made that place theirs. If he lost her … he couldn't think on that now, but he knew if he did he would command that pond destroyed. His mother had commented on 'that stupid girl' and her being so foolish. Robert had cut her down with a load roar of anger – "Don't you EVER talk about my wife that way again! – Or you will never see us, or your grandchild as long as you live – so help me!" … he had seen the way his angry words had cut at her, but he did not care. He was desperate to find Cora, to make sure she was alright. The preparing of the horses had seemed to take hours, although his father assured him it had only been minutes. Now he rode hard against the rain, straining to see in the faded light and praying with all his might that she was ok. He realized she had to be injured, that was the only explanation that would keep her out in the dark and rain. He hoped it was minor, that she was conscious, alive, ok … and the baby … he couldn't let himself think that way. Thinking of how wet she must be he thanked the young new maid Elsie for her forethought at sending him with a blanket. He rode on, the closer he got he began to call her name against the darkness and the winds. Loudly, madly he called her name over and over again – and prayed she was alright.

Cora could see her ankle had swollen and knew she would need a Dr. She hoped help would find her soon, the sky was so dark now, almost fully night and she was getting so very cold in the wind and rain. She cursed her stupidity again and prayed that Robert would find her. Surely the dressing gong would have rung by now? Surely he would know she had not returned. She clutched her arms around herself and tried to hold on. Softly against the wind she heard the faint sound of something in the distance. She strained against the wind to hear better, eventually she heard it again – definitely a sound … a voice in the darkness … her name. Robert!

"Robert" … her voice squeaked out, she was so cold, so tired, so weak … she mustered her strength and tried again, gathering her might and her voice to yell as loud as she could "ROBERT!"

Robert came to a halt and jumped off the horse. He had heard something, he had heard Cora. She was here. He yelled her name again, frantic, fearful … where was she? He heard his name again and he spun in the opposite direction and ran yelling her name, his voice was hoarse … he did not care. He saw her legs poking out from the underbrush of the bushes, vaguely made out her form laying in the darkness. His heart leapt and sunk all at once. She was here, she was alive … she was hurt. Closing the distance with a great leap he sank down next to her and cried over her as she tried to sit.

"Cora!" he could hardly breathe, she was alive. He had found her.

"Robert" she was completely soaked, her hair stuck to her face in great wet strings, her clothes were dirty and wet through, she was pale, her eyes scared and red. "You found me" she breathed as she reached for his face.

"Of course my love. I'm going to pick you up now darling, I have to get you back home" he said gently as he positioned his arms around her.

"My ankle" she gestured with her hand, he nodded and picked her up carrying her toward the horse. "take me home" Cora said softly, before she passed out in her husbands arms.

It was 4 hours later when Cora sat up in her bed and Robert stepped into the room with a ginger smile.

"You gave me a real scare" he said softly coming to sit next to her bed, taking her hand and kissing the palm of it gently, he held it against his cheek for a moment and breathed in her scent. He lowered her hand, keeping both of his wrapped around it. "I am so glad you are alright Cora, I …"his voice cracked and he couldn't finish the thought.

"Oh Robert" Cora said, her voice was still weak, but she was much better. The Dr had been called, she had been given a warm bath, a thorough examination, her ankle wrapped and propped with pillows, a warm stew bought up to her … she was far from all the way better, but she was safe, warm, and on the mend. Cora felt some pain in her ankle; the Dr had mentioned it was not broken but badly sprained. She would need to rest, he had given her some medicine to help the pain and swelling. He felt confident the baby was well, Cora did not have a fever, she had been lucky.

"I am so sorry" she burst into tears and he held her hand tighter in response. They had not seen each other since he had carried her up the stairs and the Dr had sent him away. His mother had sent for the Dr while they were gone looking for Cora, knowing she would more than likely need him upon her return. Robert had thanked her quietly while he waited to see his wife. His mother had simply nodded, they had crossed a bridge somehow – she knew he was in love with Cora, devoted to her and her first. Robert knew his mother supported them, and cared for Cora. They never actually spoke of it, but they both knew what had happened.

"It's not your fault darling, its ok. I'm just glad you are ok" Robert soothed as Cora cried. She shook her head and spoke through the tears.

"No, not for that. That was awful, but I mean – I'm sorry for what I said to you. I should never have asked you to make that kind of choice. I should never have done that to you" she dabbed at her eyes with her handkerchief and looked at Robert's confused face.

"No Cora, you were right. You have given everything for me and I nothing." Cora interrupted him and spoke quietly but with force.

"That is not your fault Robert, I knew what I was doing when I married you. I wanted to – I should never have .."

Robert help his hand up to stop her, "Cora please. Just listen to me darling. You were right. I have not sacrificed anything, and I will Cora. Not tomorrow, you need to rest, but when you are well again we can leave here. I will not pretend I won't miss it, this is my home, this is my life, but … the thing is … I could survive without Downton, I could never survive without you. I love you Cora, I will do anything to make you happy. Anything. Everything" he pulled her hand back up to his lips and kissed it gently as Cora felt a silent tear roll down her cheek yet again. After a small moment of silence she spoke again, louder than before, the conviction strong and resolute.

"If you want to truly make me happy, then stay. Stay at Downton, stay here at Downton … with me"

Robert looked at her face searching her eyes, he had been shocked plenty today, yet this one surprised him the most. "What? You want me to … what?" he asked – flabbergasted.

"This is your life Robert" Cora explained, "and I love you … all of you, Downton is part of you and so I love it too. Make me happy Robert; make me so very happy by staying here with me … in our home"

Smiling gently at his wife Robert leaned closer and lay a gentle kiss to her lips and rested his forehead against hers before sitting back down.

"I will Cora … I will make you so very happy"

… and he did.


End file.
